Collision
by Just Gabz
Summary: Daltonverse. Nothing could ever come between Ethan and Dwight, not until the car accident. Ethan loses all memory of being with Dwight but can love truly conquer all? Can Dwight find a way to trigger Ethan's memories? Written for NaNoWriMo. Dwighthan.
1. Chapter 1

_**Title:** _Collision_  
><strong>PairingsCharacters:** _Dwight/Ethan, Dwight Houston, Ethan Brightman, Evan Brightman, Reed Van Kamp_  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> _NC-17_  
><strong>Summary:<strong> _Dwight Houston and Ethan Brightman are in love. Nothing could ever come between them, not until the car accident. Ethan loses all memory of being with Dwight but can love truly conquer all? Can Dwight find a way to trigger Ethan's memories?  
><strong><em>Author Notes:<em>** Written for NaNoWriMo. Thought it was about time I started posting the chapters here :)  
><em><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> _I don't own anything. The lovely CP Coulter graced us with these characters, I just like messing around with them a little

_Chapter 1_

It started with a kiss. It always seemed to start with a kiss. Right from the beginning, which I suppose made sense considering that's where it started. The start of everything. The build up had been torture but one kiss was all it took to let everything loose.

Dwight Houston was anything but normal. All his life he'd been told that. He was the target of constant taunts and ridicule. He never had any friends, buthe was okay with that. He had his kid brother. Alan was the only friend he'd ever need. They'd protect each other from ghosts and demons and nothing would stop them. They were a team. Right up until Alan died.

He was only seven. Dwight never forgave himself. As the big brother he was supposed to keep Alan safe, but some monsters would get passed the salt and the holy water. Sometimes the line between human and monster blurred. So he ran from the monsters. He went from school to school, learning to protect himself as he went, trying to find the safest place he could, until one day he stumbled upon Dalton Academy for boys, he stumbled on Warblerland, and that's a whole other story.

Then there's Ethan. Crazy, boisterous, loud, fun Ethan. Ethan was just there for the excitement. His favourite children story was Alice in Wonderland. He and his twin brother, Evan spent their time naming their friends after the characters, having nerf fights and generally causing mischief. Dwight hated it. He hated cleaning up after him. He hated them scaring him, and pranking him. He hated it all, right up until the point Ethan's lips brushed over his. The sweetest of first kisses. The sweetest of new beginnings.

Dwight didn't see it as annoying anymore. He saw it as endearing and sometimes Ethan even forced him to join in. As much as the thought of Ethan coming at him, wielding a nerf gun terrified him, he could never say no. He'd always say yes, if just to see the smile on Ethan's face.

It was another kiss that found Dwight in his current situation. It started so innocently. Although, that was the way it usually started too. Dwight and Ethan were laying together in Dwight's room like they usually did. All he'd done is leant over and pressed a gentle kiss to Ethan's lips. It was the way Ethan was looking at him. He couldn't stop himself, he just had to kiss him. He should've known, really. Ethan was the most playful guy Dwight knew. Still, as Dwight felt a tongue slide along his bottom lip, he couldn't help but move closer, urging Ethan to do more. It felt so good whenever Ethan did that.

Ethan giggled softly into Dwight's lips before pulling him closer. Dwight kept the kiss going for just a little longer, mainly because Ethan's tongue was still swiping along his lip. Screw breathing, that felt so good, he wasn't about to let it stop. Eventually though, he had to. As he pulled away, his eyes slowly fluttered open. He missed Ethan's lips already. They were so soft and warm and Dwight was sure kissing Ethan was the greatest thing in the world.

Ethan licked his lips, smirking, "You taste really good. Can I-"

Dwight cut him off, leaning forward again, "Oh God, yes, you can."

He pressed their lips back together, sighing softly. His hand brushed along Ethan's cheek, slowly running to the back of his neck and pulling him closer. Dwight could feel Ethan's smirk against his lips and he really shouldn't have been okay with him being so smug, but this was Ethan. He'd learnt that whenever Ethan was smug, especially in situations like this one, the outcome was going to be good for both of them.

He melted just a little as he felt Ethan's tongue hesitantly flick over his lips again. It always felt so good when he did that. A jolt of excitement ran through him. It was like Ethan was reading his mind. Just as he thought about how amazing it would be for Ethan to keep going, do more, his tongue ran tortuously slowly along Dwight's bottom lip. Dwight parted his lips just enough. He didn't want to beg, but come on! If Ethan didn't keep going, Dwight was going to have to take matters into his own hands, and really, Ethan was much better at punishment than he was.

He really didn't know what it was he was expecting Ethan to do next, but when he felt teeth graze over his bottom lip, he couldn't control the sound that came from the back of his throat. It was only for a moment but it was enough to drive Dwight just a little bit insane, and he was very sure that Ethan did it on purpose. That was one thing, but then a moment passed and Ethan was sucking ever so softly on Dwight's lip, causing him to groan. That wasn't fair. He couldn't just do that. Ethan ran a hand into Dwight's hair, pulling him closer and continued to suck gently on his lip.

Dwight tried his best to stay still, knowing how good it was when Ethan got like this. He didn't want to mess with it. He'd just let Ethan do what he was good at, and he wasn't just good at it. He was amazing at it. It wasn't long before Ethan's tongue was sliding along his lip once more. Dwight whined softly as Ethan's teeth grazed along his lip again. He couldn't take it anymore. The feelings bubbling up in him were far too much to not just pounce on Ethan.

Dwight grabbed Ethan's hands, pressing him down into the sheets and pulling away from the kiss, groaning as Ethan's teeth tugged on his lip, "You're such a tease."

Ethan grinned, leaning forward in Dwight's hold, and murmuring into his lips, "You love it."

Dwight was very sure Ethan would be the death of him. He wasn't sure how, or why, he just knew he would. One day Ethan would plan something so extravagant, something so crazy and that would be the end of Dwight Houston. He also knew that it would definitely be worth it.

Dwight growled softly, murmuring into Ethan's lips roughly, "So what if I do?"

"Well, I know a few other things you love…" Ethan bit his lip, stifling his grin.

Dwight looked into Ethan's ice blue eyes, taking a shaky breath. Just the thought of all the things Ethan could do to him, would do, was enough to send shivers down his spine, "Like what?"

Ethan laced their fingers together, wrapping his leg around Dwight's and using it as leverage to flip them. He chuckled softly brushing his lips along Dwight's jaw, barely touching his skin. Dwight's breath hitched as he watched Ethan, feeling his fingers move from his hands, along his arms. Ethan's lips brushed over Dwight's ear, "You want me to show you?"

Dwight wrapped his arms around Ethan's waist, running his hands under his shirt and up his back. His skin beneath Dwight's fingertips always felt so good. It almost made him tingle. He was always so warm. Nodding slowly, he dug his nails into Ethan's back just a little. Ethan raised his eyebrows, smirking and kissed Dwight softly, moving his fingers along Dwight's sides.

It wasn't long before Ethan was deepening the kiss, running his tongue over the top of Dwight's mouth and earning a soft moan. A moment later, Ethan's hands were under Dwight's shirt, running up his chest and pushing it up. He pulled away from the kiss, whispering into Dwight's lips, "You're wearing too much."

Dwight groaned softly, running his fingers down Ethan's back. Ethan loved that. He knew he did. The way he shivered told Dwight he did. He tilted his head, looking into Ethan's eyes, a smile tugging at his lips, "You might have to do something about that."

Ethan tugged gently on Dwight's shirt, slipping it off and tossing it to the side. He grinned, running his fingers along Dwight's chest, his eyes trailing their path, "No matter how many times I see you, you're always beautiful."

Dwight shivered, his stomach filling with butterflies. It was things like that that made him love Ethan. The way he'd go from playful to sincere in an instant. The way he'd say things like that because he wanted to and he meant it. The way he looked into his eyes when he said it, like he had to be sure Dwight believed him.

"You're beautiful too." Dwight murmured softly, pulling him closer and brushing their lips together in a gentle kiss.

"My beautiful knight…" Ethan whispered, pulling away and grinning, leaning forward and sucking softly on Dwight's neck. Dwight whined, tilting his head to the side to give Ethan more room. He ran his fingers into Ethan's hair, holding him in place. Dwight was finding it hard to stay still as Ethan's teeth slowly sank into his skin.

"N-Not fair." Dwight moaned, rolling his hips forward and earning a groan from the Tweedle.

Ethan kissed the mark left on Dwight's neck, looking up at him and frowning, "What?"

"You're still wearing a shirt." Dwight pulled at Ethan's shirt, his breath hitching as he caught sight of the delicious sliver of skin above Ethan's belt. He pulled Ethan's shirt off, grinning as he dropped the shirt and ran his fingers along Ethan's sides, "Okay, you can keep going now."

Ethan laughed, "Why, thank you." He leant forward once more, presing gentle kisses to Dwight's chest. Dwight always made a soft noise in the back of his throat when Ethan did that. The feel of Ethan's soft lips on his skin made him shiver. Suddenly those same lips were on Dwight's nipple, his tongue slowly brushing along the sensitive skin and Dwight found himself gasping all over again. Ethan knew every part of Dwight's body. He knew exactly where to touch, kiss, lick, bite. As his teeth grazed over Dwight's nipple, the knight threw his head back, moaning. It was unfair; how good he was at that.

Eventually, Ethan moved lower, his lips ghosting over his stomach, causing Dwight's stomach muscles to quiver. Ethan was a tease. The biggest tease Dwight had ever known and pretty soon, he knew he was going to be begging. Ethan had a way of making him do that even when he tells himself he won't. As Ethan's hand brushed over Dwight's jeans, he couldn't stop his hips bucking forward, desperate for the friction.

Ethan smirked, pressing his palm against him just a little firmer, "God, you're dying for it, aren't you?"

Dwight whimpered, "Ethan…"

There was a moment of complete silence, the only sounds in the room were shallow breaths as Ethan slowly unzipped Dwight's jeans. His hand slowly slid into Dwight's pants as his eyes trailed up to Dwight's face, smirking as he watched his reactions. As soon as Ethan's fingers brushed over his length, stroking him, Dwight gasped, unable to stop his hips from moving with Ethan's hand. Ethan was far too talented with his hands for his own good.

Moans spilled from Dwight's lips, his fingers clawing roughly at Ethan's back, "E-Ethan…please…"

"I love it when you beg." Ethan smirked, his thumb tugging at the waistband of Dwight's pants, "These are going to have to go…"

Suddenly Ethan was dragging off Dwight's jeans, along with his pants and Dwight would've been absolutely fine with this if it didn't mean that Ethan wasn't touching him anymore. He craved that attention. Ethan was so good at making him want, and need, and beg for every touch. Ethan was slowly running his fingers up Dwight's thighs and the knight had to bite down on his lip to stop himself making any sounds. There was something about Ethan. He was so good at touching him in just the right ways.

As Ethan's lips ghosted along Dwight's thigh, he groaned softly, watching him, "Ethan, please…"

"Patience, Dwight." Ethan murmured, running his tongue along the underside of Dwight's length as slowly as he could.

Dwight whined, clutching at the bed sheets. As Ethan carefully flicked his tongue over the tip, Dwight arched his back, his breath becoming ragged. Ethan's tongue was torture. It always was. Every touch sent a new jolt of pleasure through Dwight and he was sure the teasing was going to kill him if he didn't get what he wanted soon.

Again, it was as though Ethan could read his thoughts because suddenly his mouth was engulfing him, sucking on the tip before taking as much of him as he could. Everything was on impulse. They'd both learnt enough about each other by now to know what they liked. The first time they did this, Dwight didn't know whether he was allowed to run his fingers into Ethan's hair, but he'd learnt.

He gripped Ethan's hair tightly, tugging roughly as he sucked on Dwight's length. It was all Dwight could do not to scream. When Ethan got like this is wasn't long before Dwight went incoherent. He couldn't focus on anything but the wet heat of Ethan's mouth around him. The consuming pleasure running through Dwight became even more as Ethan started moving, bobbing his head and sucking a little harder. He let his tongue run along Dwight and there was no way for him to stop himself crying out in pleasure.

"E-Ethan…mmm…"

Dwight did all he could to will his hips to stay still. Ethan slowed, licking teasingly at Dwight. The knight's mouth opened and closed in silent moans as Ethan suddenly sped up his movements. He knew Ethan was trying to tease him, trying to rile him up but he really didn't care. All he cared about was the way Ethan's mouth felt around him, bringing him closer and closer to the edge.

It wasn't long before Dwight felt that warmth in his stomach, that familiar warmth coiling up inside him. He'd felt it before so many times. He's felt It as Ethan was grinding against him. He felt it when Ethan touched him, stroking him until breaking point. He'd felt it when Ethan had pressed him against the wall and thrust into him hard, fast, desperate for every moment of pleasure. "S-So close Ethan…please…"

Ethan ran his hands along Dwight's thighs, spreading his legs further and taking more of him into his mouth, sucking harder and moving faster. Dwight was on edge. He couldn't take much more. His fingers were gripping to Ethan's hair as tightly as they could. He couldn't hold back anymore. Dwight screamed, pleasure washing over him as he came undone. He could feel Ethan swallowing everything, licking him clean and he couldn't hold back his groan. His whole body felt like it was melting into the bed, smiling lazily up at Ethan as he crawled back up his body.

Ethan's smirk should've annoyed him. He shouldn't have liked how smug Ethan was but he didn't care. He was still trying to get his brain to work when Ethan was kissing him softly. Tasting himself on Ethan's lips was enough to bring him back down to Earth, groaning softly and deepening the kiss.

"I love you." Ethan whispered into Dwight's lips.

Dwight smiled softly, his stomach filling with butterflies. Ethan said that all the time. Every day, but it still got to him. It still made him blush. It still made him tingle and it still made him what to kiss Ethan senseless. "I love you too." Dwight couldn't help it. He had to kiss Ethan again. He brushed his hand along Ethan's shoulder as he did, sighing happily before murmuring softly, "It's your turn."

Dwight could see the lust in Ethan's eyes. He could see the way those three words affected him. He almost liked this more than when Ethan went down on him. Almost. The way Ethan reacted, the way Dwight could tease him and Ethan couldn't do anything to stop him, mostly, the sounds Ethan made.

He gently flipped them, running his fingers along Ethan's arms. It felt so good to have Ethan's skin beneath his fingertips. He leant forward, brushing his lips against Ethan's shoulder, gently kissing before sinking his teeth into Ethan's skin. Ethan's soft moan was enough to spur on Dwight's actions. He loved those noises Ethan made. Slowly, he trailed his fingers down Ethan's stomach, still sucking gently on his shoulder and undid his belt. He pressed gentle kisses to the mark he had left behind, smirking as he slowly slid down Ethan's pants.

"Are you trying to torture me on purpose?" Ethan murmured, groaning under his breath.

Dwight smirked, scratching his nails roughly down Ethan's thighs, "Why? Is it working?"

"Yes." Ethan groaned, running his hands along Dwight's back, watching him carefully. Dwight looked up into Ethan's eyes, still smirking. That was the best thing about Ethan. He watched Dwight carefully in moments like these, which meant Dwight could look into his eyes as he swiped his tongue over the tip of Ethan's length. Ethan moaned, closing his eyes for just a moment and arching his back. He looked so good when he did that.

Dwight smirked, catching Ethan's eye once more, staring into them. They'd gone dark with lust and that shouldn't have been nearly as hot as Dwight thought it was. He continued to look into Ethan's eyes as he slowly took him into his mouth, moaning as he dug his fingers into Ethan's thighs. The room was filled with Ethan's moans as his hands found their way to Dwight's hair, guiding his movements. Dwight loved that too. Even though he was causing those sounds, driving Ethan crazy, Ethan needed control, dominance and Dwight loved Ethan's dominance.

It didn't take long. Soon he had Ethan begging. Ethan sounded so good when he begged, whining and mewling as he writhed beneath Dwight. He sped up his movements, sucking harder and finally sending Ethan over the edge, screaming Dwight's name. He licked the Tweedle clean, crawling up his body and curling into his side. That was probably Dwight's favourite part of all; curling up in Ethan's arms, eventually falling asleep together.

"You're so good at that." Ethan murmured, still trying to get his breathing back to normal.

Dwight chuckled softly, running a hand through Ethan's blonde locks, "You started it."

"Mmm but you finished it." Ethan giggled, wrapping his arms around Dwight and pulling him closer.

Dwight nuzzled Ethan's neck, looking up at him and smiling softly, "I love you."

The way Ethan looked at him was enough to melt his heart. He smiled the softest, most sincere smile and pulled Dwight closer, whispering into his lips before brushing them together, "I love you too."


	2. Chapter 2

_Chapter 2_

Mornings were amazing. The sunlight was always a pain at first. The first reaction generally was to pull the blankets over their heads, shuffle closer and bury his face into Ethan's chest. Ethan was so warm. Not too warm though. He was that perfect, just right warmth that had Dwight practically clinging to him. At first he was embarrassed, but he was getting used to the way Ethan would pull him closer, kissing the top of his head.

So really, the warmth and the closeness was perfect. Dwight couldn't help but move closer. There was absolutely no space left between them by morning. Their legs were wrapped together in a loose embrace. Those were always the first things to move on Dwight in the morning. He would stretch them unconsiously, rubbing his leg along Ethan's and sighing happily.

Next were his arms. He somehow always found himself clutching to Ethan a little tighter. He had one arm wrapped around Ethan's neck, the other wrapped loosely around his waist, their fingers laced together even in sleep. Dwight wasn't sure how that happened. They never went to sleep holding hands, but they always woke up like that. Dwight had asked Ethan if he woke up and did it but Ethan just laughed at him, kissing his cheek. So that one remained the mystery.

With Ethan, his morning routine had changed somewhat. Instead of jumping out of bed, more than ready to start his day, he had absolutely no reason to. Everything he wanted was already right there with him, in his arms. Why would he ever want to go anywhere? Ethan was warm and safe and he smelt like mint, which, as a hunter, he knew was very good for keeping evil spirits away. He was completely protected with Ethan. So instead of getting up, he rubbed his leg against Ethan's, held him a little tighter and then went back to sleep.

When he finally did start to stir again, He'd feel a hand gently brushing through his hair. He would always check to see if Ethan was still holding his hand and he always would be. Ethan would keep the blankets over their heads, knowing how much Dwight hated the sunlight in his eyes first thing in the morning. The hand running through his hair would soothe him. He's sigh happily, even press his head into Ethan's hand, urging him to keep going.

Then Dwight would recognise that familiar scent. He'd shift closer, burying his face in Ethan's neck and take a deep breath, feeling almost giddy as Ethan seemed to surround him in all the right ways. Ethan would giggle when he did that. Every single time. Dwight guessed that he must tickle him, or something like that every time he did it.

Eventually he knew he'd have to look up though. He'd have to open his eyes and as much as he really, really didn't want to, he knew the sight that would greet him would be well and truly worth it. Finally, Dwight's eyes fluttered open. He yawned into Ethan's neck before looking up at him in the darkness from underneath the blankets. Ethan would smile that soft, beautiful, perfect smile and Dwight would want to curl into him even more.

"Good morning sleepy head." Ethan whispered, chuckling softly, "You sleep so much."

"Your fault. You're too comfortable." Dwight murmured, his voice still deep with sleep.

"I'm sorry, do you want me to leave?"

"No!" Dwight hugged Ethan as tightly as he could, "Mmm my teddy bear…"

Ethan giggled, kissing Dwight's cheek, "All yours."

Dwight grinned, loosening his hold just a little bit. Moments like these were perfect. He wanted them to last forever. It was just he and Ethan in their own little world they'd created together. He looked up into Ethan's eyes, getting lost. They were this beautiful ice blue colour but if Dwight looked closely, tilting his head just so, he'd be able to see the tiny flecks of green in them. They were beautiful. They were hypnotising.

"You're doing it again." Ethan bit his lip, stifling his grin.

Dwight blushed, "S-Sorry. They're so beautiful…"

Ethan brushed their noses together, whisperin, "So are yours."

A moment of silence passed between them. One of those moments where there was absolutely no need for words. They were so far passed that now. They could just lay together, looking into each other's eyes and that would be enough. Of course, soon it wasn't. Ethan had that look in his eyes that compelled Dwight to remove all distance between them, kissing Ethan delicately and rubbing his thumb gently against his cheek.

When Dwight pulled away, the first thing he did was wrap his arms around Ethan's neck, hugging him close and resting his head on his shoulder, "I'm keeping you."

"Fine by me." Ethan chucked, trailing his fingers up and down Dwight's back.

"Promise to be mine forever?"

"I promise." Ethan whispered into Dwight's ear, kissing his cheek.

Dwight sighed happily, "What are we doing today?"

"Well…" Ethan ran his fingers back up into Dwight's hair, "It's a Saturday, so I was thinking we could go get breakfast together."

Dwight looked up at Ethan, "I woke up in time for breakfast?"

Ethan laughed, "Yes. You did. If you get up and get dressed right now."

Dwight whined, clinging to Ethan, "But I don't want to move…"

Ethan pressed a long, soft kiss to Dwight's lips and the hunter immediately melted into him. It felt so nice to have their lips pressed together. He loosened his grip on Ethan just a little bit, losing himself in the moment. That's the way things always seemed to be with Ethan. You always lose yourself in the moment. There's no thought for consequence. It's just the moment. It's them and it's chaos and madness and sheer thrills. Nothing with Ethan was ever simple, but then, who'd want it to be?

When Ethan finally pulled away for air, Dwight's eyes stayed closed, his lips parted as he tried his hardest to keep that moment, just for a little bit longer, "Get dressed, and I will pay. Come on."

Dwight reluctantly opened his eyes, nipping softly on Ethan's lip, "You're not paying."

"I'm paying."

"You are not paying." Dwight ghosted his hand over Ethan's side, causing the Tweedle's breath to hitch and he raised an eyebrow, smirking.

"Alright, I'm not paying, just don't tickle me."

Dwight chuckled, hugging Ethan for a moment more before crawling out of bed. He knew Ethan was watching him. He always did. Not that he minded at all. He was flattered. Ethan's gaze on his bare body used to embarrass him. He used to get nervous and think the worse, but now he knew Ethan liked how he looked, always would and he didn't mind anymore. In fact, he played it up sometimes. Ethan wasn't the only one who could be a tease.

Dwight could feel Ethan's gaze on him. He looked back at the Tweedle, smirking with an eyebrow raised, "Enjoying the view?"

"Mmm don't I always?" Ethan chuckled softly, biting his lip.

Dwight rolled his eyes, walking over to the drawer of clothes. Ethan didn't stay in his room technically. Technically Ethan stayed down the hall with his twin brother Evan. So it always made Dwight smile when he opened the drawer and saw Ethan's clothes mixed in with his. It was like even when Ethan wasn't there, he was. Dwight had long since decided that his room was Ethan's too. Ethan was allowed in there anytime. Day or night.

Dwight picked out one of Ethan's hoodies. His favourite. It was a dark blue colour that went with Ethan's icy blue eyes, "Can…can I…?"

"Yes Dwight." Ethan chuckled, "You can always wear my hoodies, you know that."

Dwight smiled brightly, running his hand over the fabric, "This one's my favourite." He murmured softly.

Ethan quickly made his way over to Dwight, wrapping his arms around his waist from behind him and resting his head on Dwight's shoulder, "You're so cute when you say stuff like that."

Dwight leaned back into Ethan's warmth, sighing happily, "I'd call you a hypocrite for telling me to get dressed when you're not but this is much nicer."

Ethan laughed softly, murmuring into Dwight's ear, "I though you preferred me naked."

"I thought you preferred me naked too." Dwight retorted, "Besides, I'm the only one who gets to see you like this. No one else."

"Mmm possessive. I like it."

"Yeah, you do." Dwight turned his head, kissing Ethan's cheek. "Get dressed."

Dwight watched Ethan move around the room, grabbing simple red shirt, pants and jeans. The hunter grabbed his own pants and jeans, quickly shrugging them on.

"Mmm just go out like that." Ethan grinned.

Dwight laughed, grabbing Ethan's arm and pulling him close, wrapping his arms around his waist, "You're insatiable."

"You love it." Ethan smirked, kissing Dwight softly, "Come on. We're going to be late."

"…For breakfast?"

"You can be late for breakfast." Ethan replied knowingly. He slipped on his clothes, smiling fondly as he watched Dwight pull on his blue hoodie.

Dwight pressed his nose to the fabric, taking a deep breath and sighing happily. It had that perfect smell. That smell Dwight had come to fall in love with. His favourite smell. It was like a mix of different smells. The most prominent one was mint. That made him feel so safe. He felt protected whenever he smelt that. Then there was this sort of musky smell. That made it even better somehow. Then there was this one last smell. It was indifinable. There was no smell like it. It was just pure Ethan. He loved wearing Ethan's hoodies for that, but also because they were the perfectly right amount of warm. It made it feel like Ethan aways had his arms around him. It made Ethan's hoodies perfect.

Ethan grabbed Dwight's leather jacket, smiling softly, "You get my hoodie, I get your jacket?"

Dwight rolled his eyes, walking over to Ethan and putting the jacket on him, kissing his nose, "It brings out your eyes."

Ethan hummed happily, lacing their fingers together and pulling Dwight close as he opened the door, "You pay, I drive?"

Dwight quickly grabbed his holy water bottle, clipping it to his belt and smiling softly, "Sounds fair."

x X x

Dwight rested his head against the window as Ethan drove, watching silently as the world passed by around them. He always wondered what the people in the other car's stories were. He wondered why someone would look so sad. Maybe they'd lost someone too. Then he'd see someone happy. Someone laughing. Someone dancing to the music on their car radios and he couldn't help but smile, because no matter the cruelty the world dealt out, there was a reason to smile.

He moved his hand onto Ethan's knee, rubbing soft circles into his jeans and continued to smile. He liked being close to Ethan. He liked being able to touch him, to reassure himself that Ethan was there and he wasn't going anywhere. Without even thinking about it, he ran his hand further up Ethan's leg, increasing his grip just a little bit.

Ethan coughed, "You want me to crash the car?"

Dwight quickly took his hand back, blushing, "S-Sorry."

Ethan's hand brushed over Dwight's and Dwight turned to look at him, his brows furrowed in confusion. Ethan's thumb brushed gently over Dwight's hand until he finally turned it over, pressing their palms together. Ethan let their fingers thread together, his eyes staying on the road as he continued to rub Dwight's hand with his thumb.

"I didn't say to take your hand away." He spoke softly.

Dwight just kept looking at their hands, a smile tugging at his lips. It was the simplest of gestures, but another thing that made him love Ethan. Whenever he felt like he'd done something wrong, Ethan would pick up on it and he'd make Dwight feel like he was the most amazing person in the world. He made Dwight feel like he could do anything, just as long as they were together. Gently, he squeezed Ethan's hand, silently thanking him. Again.

Ethan did things like this every day. He knew how insecure Dwight was. He knew about Alan, and how Dwight blamed himself. He knew that as long as they were together, if Dwight was to make a mistake, no matter how small, it would nag at him. So he did everything he could to stop the nagging feeling. He did everything to make sure Dwight knew that his mistakes were tiny and unimportant and that Ethan never held them against him, just like Dwight never held any of the little mistakes Ethan made against him either. Because they were a team and there was so much good, the bad was meaningless.

The rest of the car trip was made in silence. Every now and then Ethan would gently squeeze Dwight's hand. In return, Dwight would bring Ethan's to his lips and press a delicate kiss to his knuckles. That's all they needed; each other.

When they got there, Dwight was reluctant to let go. He liked Ethan's hand in his. It fit s perfectly. When he did let go, he kept his eyes on Ethan's hand, watching he way he moved his fingers. Ethan chuckled softly, "The sooner you get out of that car, the sooner you can hold my hand again."

Dwight took the less than subtle hint, quickly getting out of the car. He yawned softly, stretching before reaching out for Ethan's hand. The Tweedle smirked, holding Dwight's hand and tugging him close, ruffling Dwight's black hair. He whined, running his free hand through his hair, trying to fix it, "What was that for?"

"No. Don't fix it. It looks good like that." Ethan giggled, kissing Dwight's cheek, "Why are you so tired? Did you sleep okay?"

Dwight raised his eyebrows, "I slept perfectly. You just wore me out before I got to the sleeping part."

Ethan grinned, raising his eyebrows suggestively, "We should do it again some time."

"Such a sweet talker." Dwight rolled his eyes.

It was at that moment that Ethan decided to do something sudden, something that Dwight wasn't expecting. It wasn't much, but it was enough to startle him. Ethan pressed Dwight to the side of the car, pinning him there. Ethan was always one for doing something Dwight won't expect, and as Ethan's eyes trailed over Dwight's body, he took a long, shaky breath.

Ethan leant forward, whispering into Dwight's ear, "You're the sort to be wined and dined…dinner, you and me?" He nipped gently on Dwight's lip, causing his breath to hitch, "What do you say?"

"Y-Yeah…okay." Dwight nodded quickly, leaning forward and pressing their lips together on impulse. When Ethan got almost demanding like that, it was a huge turn on. Dwight couldn't help it, he needed to kiss him. Soon Ethan's hand was brushing into Dwight's hair and Dwight was enjoying that far too much, sighing softly. When he absolutely had to, Dwight pulled away, resting their heads together, "I love you."

"I love you too." Ethan grinned, "Now come on, you're meant to be buying me breakfast."

Dwight grabbed Ethan's arm, linking it with his and leant into him, sighing happily. Ethan was taller than him. Not by much, but still. It kind of added to that feeling of safety. Dwight liked to think it also added to Ethan's warmth, as much as he knew it did nothing.

The café they went to was only small. It was a familiar place. They went there together all the time and it felt homey. It was like their own little place. They had so many of their own little places. This one seemed special though. They shared so many mornings together in the booth at the back of the room. Their booth. Ethan had even gone so far as to carve 'D.H+E.B' into the bottom of the wall by that booth. He said it was their claim. That they'd come back there with their kids in twenty years and they'd see that, and remember all the times they'd shared.

Dwight was holding Ethan's hand again by the time they got inside, stepping up to the counter and twirling Ethan in a circle, earning a giggle. He smiled brightly at the cashier, "Hey. I'll have a medium latte with pancakes and he will have one medium caramel frappe with extra coffee and a bacon and egg bagel."

Ethan stared at Dwight for a moment, "How do you know my order?"

Dwight chuckled, "Because you get the same thing every time we come here." He kissed Ethan's cheek, smirking, "I can't help it if you're predictable."

"I'm going to have to try harder to trick you, huh?"

Dwight grinned, "I wish you all the luck in the world."

"Why thank you."

Dwight paid for their order, grabbing Ethan and dragging him towards their booth. He watched Ethan carefully as he sat down. He couldn't help it. He liked to watch Ethan's simple movements. He liked to see the way the Tweedle carried himself. Ethan just grinned up at him, waiting for him to sit too.

Dwight reached out for Ethan's hand again as he sat down. Ethan's hand was already there, his finger tapping gently on the table as Dwight reached out across it, brushing his finger gently along Ethan's. The blonde smiled softly, catching Dwight's finger with one of his own. Dwight pouted, causing Ethan to laugh before running his fingers against Dwight's knuckles, looking into his eyes. Every time Ethan did that, Dwight swore he fell in love all over again.

"What are you thinking about?" Ethan almost whispered.

"You." Dwight replied simply, causing Ethan to blush.

"What about me?"

"You're beautiful." Dwight smiled softly, tapping one of Ethan's fingers with his own, "And I'm having trouble fathoming that you're real."

"I am." Ethan grinned.

Dwight reluctantly pulled his hand away as their food arrived, biting his lip as he smiled at Ethan. Sometimes he'd feed Ethan some of his pancakes. Sometimes Ethan would just steal a piece. Sometimes he'd end up ignoring them completely, instead reveling in Ethan and the excited look on his face as he spoke about adventures he'd had with Evan, or even just adventures he'd planned out in his mind. When Ethan thought about things like that, he looked so alive. So happy. Dwight was always drawn in.

This time Ethan watched him for a moment, waiting. Dwight felt a little self concious, fidgetting in his seat, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I want you to talk this time."

"W-What?"

Ethan rested his head on his hand, smiling fondly at Dwight's nervousness, "Every time we come here, you listen to me talk and it's about time you did. I want to hear about you. I want to hear about your childhood. What was Alan like?"

Dwight froze in his place. He never really spoke about Alan at all. It was a subject that remained closed as much as Dwight could manage it. He shuffled in his seat again, staring down at his pancakes, "I-I…what do you want to know?"

"You don't have to. I'm sorry. I'm asking too much of you."

"No. No, I just…I don't know where to start."

"I don't mind what you tell me. Just something. I want to know about what you were like as a kid." Ethan grinned excitedly, taking a bite of his bagel.

Dwight smiled softly, "Alan…he always looked up to me. I used to teach him about hunting. I set up his own bottle of holy water for him, clipped it to his belt. He was so little and the bottle was so big, it just weighed him down." Dwight cut a piece of his pancakes, taking a bite, "H-He…he would always try to protect me, no matter how many times I told him that was my job. We'd always get into so much trouble, because we'd go off on these little adventures together and end up breaking something of mom's. He'd hide in my room with me for hours, and I'd read to him from one of my books."

Dwight looked up, biting his lip as he realised he was rambling. He didn't mean to. There was just so much to say about Alan. When he looked up, he saw Ethan staring right back at him, his bagel held up slightly with a big, goofy grin on his face. Dwight really wasn't sure what he was supposed to think about that grin. He blushed, cutting up his pancakes and taking another bite, "S-Sorry. Rambling."

"Don't stop." Ethan urged, shuffling forward in his seat, "Please. It's so cute."

"R-Really?" Dwight tilted his head, raising an eyebrow curiously.

"Really." Ethan smiled softly, "You were an amazing brother…and you're going to be an even more amazing Dad."

Dwight's stomach filled with butterflies and he couldn't stop himself smiling, "I…thank you. You will too. I know you will."

"Please tell me more?" Ethan pouted.

Dwight smirked, nodding slowly. He told Ethan as much as he could in the time it took them to eat. He told him about the times Alan had driven him crazy, and the times he'd been scared he'd lost Alan. He even told him about when Alan saved him. Ethan knew more about Dwight and his brother than anyone else in the world. It felt like he had opened a door, showing Ethan a huge and defining part of his life, and as usual, Ethan showed him that he could do that without any fear, because this was Ethan and Ethan would listen forever. That's what love did to him, and Dwight was so grateful.

He watched Ethan for a moment as they sat there in silence, smiling fondly, "What else are we doing today?"

Ethan grinned, looking down at the table, "I was thinking it was about time you and I had a date with some nerf guns."

"Really?" Dwight bit his lip nervously.

It wasn't that he didn't want to. On the contrary, he loved having fun with Ethan in the Tweedle's own special way. It brought out the best in Ethan when they did that. It was just that when Ethan was wielding a nerf gun, he was a little bit terrifying. Dwight was well and truly no match. The only time he could ever stand a chance against Ethan was if he was hunting, and he'd never have the heart to actually hunt Ethan. He was sure Ethan was going easy on him every time. He didn't know why. It could've been because Ethan was trying to spare his feelings. Truth was, Dwight didn't care. It made Ethan smile the most perfect smile in the world. He couldn't deny him that.

"Yes, really. Please Dwight?" Ethan pouted, giving Dwight the best puppydog eyes he could muster.

Dwight groaned, rolling his eyes. He definitely couldn't deny that. Ethan knew he couldn't. That just wasn't fair, "Okay, okay. Fine, but if you run at me with that battlecry like you did last time, I swear I'm locking myself in a room and hiding from you until I'm sure you're not possessed."

Ethan giggled, brushing his hand over Dwight's on the table, "No promises."


	3. Chapter 3

_Chapter 3_

Dwight had his head pressed against the window again, sighing softly. Mornings like these with Ethan were always so perfect. It was just them and there was nothing else. Nothing else ever mattered but this. These moments. Being together. This was it for Dwight. This was all it would ever be; just the two of them.

Dwight reached out for Ethan's hand again, smiling softly when Ethan met him half way, brushing their fingers together. They'd been together so long now. Just over six months but it felt like a life time. It felt like they were always going to be together. Dwight knew they would. He couldn't ever give up on the Tweedle. This was it for him.

The brush of his fingertips was all Dwight wanted. The touch. The look in Ethan's eyes that screamed 'I love you' every single time. The infectious laugh spilling from the blonde's lips. The way he always, always insisted that Dwight do something he would never even think to do before that moment. What more could he ask for when he had everything right there, shared in just the simplest of touches.

Ethan brushed his fingers gently over Dwight's palm, barely touching and caused him to giggle, "Tickles."

Ethan laughed, doing it again, and biting his lip to stifle his grin. Dwight chucked, grabbing Ethan's finger to stop him. He carefully laced their fingers together, pulling Ethan's hand closer and pressing a gently kiss to it, sighing happily, "You know I love you, right?"

"I had a sneaking suspicion, yeah." Ethan laughed, taking his hand away and resting it on Dwight's leg.

Dwight immediately placed his hand over Ethan's smiling fondly, "I mean it."

"I know Dwight, I love you too."

"Always?" Dwight murmured, just wanting to hear Ethan speak.

"Forever."

Dwight smiled softly, resting his head against the window once more. It was cloudy. He was sure it was going to rain at any moment. That meant their nerf fight would have to be indoors. Shame really. He'd had some good experience with outdoor nerf fights. More places to hide. It was coming towards lunch time already. They were a street over from the school. Not more than ten minutes away, really. Dwight wished they'd left sooner. Or later. Whatever could've stopped what happened next.

Ethan looked over at Dwight, his smile still present as ever, "What's with you?"

Dwight looked up from his spot. He was going to tell him nothing. He was going to say that he was still tired and that he just liked the sound of Ethan's voice because it soothed him. He was going to tell him that he loved to hear Ethan say that he loved him, loved the sound of the sincerity in his voice. There were so many things he was going to say. He didn't say any of them. He didn't have enough time to get all that out.

When Dwight turned, he was prepared to see Ethan's eyes looking at him, just for a moment before looking back at the road. What he did see was far worse. He saw a car coming right at them. He was sure they had right of way. Ethan was the best driver he knew, but there it was, moving closer and closer towards them and when he finally could get himself to speak, all he could do was cry out Ethan's name. He had no time for anything else because it was already hitting them.

It was like everything slowed down in the moment. The car was pushed harshly across the road. Dwight's arm his the door roughly, his head hitting the window and pain shot through him but he didn't care. He wasn't focusing on that. His mind was racing. All he could think about was Ethan. Ethan was there and he was on the side the car hit. He couldn't tell if Ethan was okay or not.

The air was filled with the sound of metal crushing against metal. It made Dwight's stomach churn as he thought of it, pictured the way the car had collided with theirs, the sickening thought of the metal bending and crushing together. When their car finally stopped moving across the road, Dwight gave himself a moment, rubbing his head to try to make the pain go away. It was already aching. There was pain shooting through his arm. He wasn't sure how hard he'd hit it. Groaning softly, looking over at Ethan. He wasn't sure if his heart stopped or sped up. Ethan wasn't moving. His eyes were closed and he was slumped against the wheel of the car.

"Ethan?" Dwight carefully brushed his hand over Ethan's shoulder, "Ethan, baby, wake up."

Dwight whimpered as Ethan stayed still, taking off his seat belt and turning in his chair to face Ethan properly. He ran a hand gently through Ethan's hair, "Ethan, wake up!"

Ethan still didn't move, worse still, as Dwight pulled his hand away, he felt something wet on it. He didn't want to look. He didn't want to see it. He knew what it was but he wanted to pretend that Ethan was just sleeping, that nothing was wrong. Why did anything have to go wrong?

He looked at his hand, choking on a sob as he saw the scarlet blood. He took a long, shuddering breath, moving Ethan's hair from his eyes, and brushing his dry hand along his cheek, "Ethan, please…"

Ethan still wouldn't move and Dwight became desperate. He rushed to grab his phone from his pocket, calling the ambulance. His fingers were shaking as he held the phone to his ear, talking as calmly as he could manage. They kept telling him to get out of the car and that he couldn't move Ethan. Dwight stared at Ethan unconcious beside him. He knew Ethan was alive. He had a pulse, but that just made it even more clear to him that he couldn't just leave him there. They were so insistent though. They kept telling him he had to get out of the car so Dwight grabbed Ethan's hand.

He squeezed it gently and pressed a kiss to his knuckles, whispering softly, "I'm not going to leave you. I promise."

Dwight stumbled out of the car. He limped, his leg aching as he made his way to the other side of the car. Their car had moved away from the one that hit them with the force. Tears fell down Dwight's cheeks as he took in the damage the other car had done. The metal of the driver's door had twisted in. Dwight felt sick just looking at it, trying to figure out how much of that was digging into Ethan's side.

He leant against the side of the car, looking into the back window at Ethan as pain rushed through his leg. "Just hold on. We're going to get you out Ethan, I promise. Just hold on a little longer."

x X x

Dwight was tired. He was starting to fall asleep when the ambulance got there. He didn't want to sleep though. He had to stay awake and make sure Ethan was okay. He promised Ethan he wouldn't leave and there was no way he was backing out on that. Even as they wrapped him in a blanket, saying Dwight was in shock. He wasn't though. He was seeing it all clearly, clearer than they could. If they didn't get Ethan out now, he was going to die. He couldn't just let them take their time. He couldn't just let them carefully check him over while he slowly died in the front seat, just to make sure it was safe to move him. Dwight had already done all that. He needed help now.

Dwight was screaming. He couldn't help it, they couldn't see how dire the situation was. He screamed Ethan's name and he screamed for them to get him out. He screamed until his voice went hoarse, his whole body shaking. This was all so wrong. Ethan was supposed to be okay. They were supposed to be back at Dalton. They were supposed to have nerf guns and he was supposed to be hiding from Ethan.

Why couldn't it be like that? Ethan would catch him every time and he'd pounce on him, every time without fail. He'd pounce and Dwight could never quite catch him in time, falling to the ground. Not that he ever minded. Ethan would giggle, and kiss him and whisper 'I win' in his ear. Dwight always thought he was the winner though. Every time.

So when he looked around him, seeing the debris from the smashed up cars, he shivered, pulling the blanket tighter around him as he watched them finally, finally get Ethan out of the car on a stretcher. Dwight turned to the paramedic standing beside him, making sure he was okay, "I'm going in the ambulance with him. I-I'm not leaving him."

He rested his hand on Dwight's shoulder, smiling as reassuringly as he could. Dwight looked away, staring at the floor. He didn't want to see that smile. He could only imagine how many times he'd given that same smile to other people, to people who didn't make it, to families who would have to go on without fathers or mothers, brothers or sisters.

He watched as the brought Ethan over to them, moving out of the way as they wheeled him into the ambulance and quickly followed. As he got in, sitting down on the bench next to Ethan, he immediately grabbed his hand, lacing their fingers together.

"Are you family?" Another paramedic asked curiously and Dwight looked up at them, startled.

He wasn't sure what he was supposed to say. He couldn't just lie, but what if he told the truth and got kicked out? They'd know if he was lying though. He hard black hair, pale skin and brown eyes, and Ethan had blonde hair, blue eyes and a tan. He looked down at Ethan's face, gently squeezing his hand and took a deep breath, "You could say that."

The paramedic looked at him for a moment before sitting beside him, "Good enough."

Dwight let out the breath he didn't realise he'd been holding in, holding Ethan's hand to his lips and closing his eyes. He couldn't lose him. Not now. Not when they had so much planned, so much they were going to do together. They were going to get married one day. They were going to get a house together, and have kids. They had so much ahead of them, it couldn't just stop here. Not like this. Ethan had so much life left in him.

"You've got to fight, okay? You've got to fight for me so that we can do all those things we said we'd do." Dwight whispered into Ethan's hand, holding a little tighter, desperate for the human touch, trying to tell himself that Ethan was there, he was still alive and he wasn't letting go, "Nerf fights, hmm? I'll let you knock me over, I won't even try to catch you if you don't want me to. You promised me a promised me dinner so don't you dare leave me now."

There were tears falling down Dwight's cheeks as he looked at Ethan's face, his eyes closed, blood in his otherwise perfect blonde hair. He shuffled up towards Ethan's side, brushing a hand gently through his hair and humming softly. It was a song Ethan hummed to him when he woke from nightmares, or cried over memories of Alan. Ethan never sang lyrics, just the same melody. It was beautiful. Dwight knew he couldn't do it justice, but he wanted to try something.

"I-Is he going to be okay?" Dwight whispered softly, looking up at the paramedic as he wiped at his eyes, "Please. He has to be okay."

"We don't know yet." They smiled sadly, "Head wounds are always a worry, so that's what we're going to focus on. There's a large gash on his leg. Just keep thinking positively."

Dwight sighed softly, leaning forward and resting his head on Ethan's chest, looking up at him, "You're all I have left."


	4. Chapter 4

_Chapter 4_

"Hello? Yeah…it's Ethan…there was an accident. You need to come to the hospital. It's hard to explain, just come. Okay…bye." Dwight's voice was cold and flat as he spoke on his phone, flipping it shut and carefully putting it back into his pocket.

They were worried Dwight might be concussed, but he wasn't. They checked him over and it was nothing more than a bump. Nothing more than a light bruise. His leg was a little worse, but only a little. No broken bones. No bleeding. Just bad, bad bruises.

Why did he get off so lucky? Why wasn't he the one in the bed? He should've driven. He should've let Ethan pay and then he could've driven and he'd be the one in there, not the Tweedle. Not his Tweedle. He could still feel the blood on his fingers. Ethan's blood. It made him feel ill. He had Ethan's blood on his hands, in more ways than one. He didn't know what he was supposed to do.

He felt so useless sitting in the waiting room. He stared at the floor, his face emotionless. He was so tired. Emotionally and physically. He could barely stand and every now and then his eyes would close, but he wouldn't let it stay that way. He had to stay awake. He had to be there when Ethan woke.

His mind was eating away at him. Telling him of how useless he was, how much he had done wrong. He couldn't save his brother and now, here he was, unable to save the guy he loved. He was a failure. Why was he always the one spared while the people he loved were left to hurt? Why couldn't he save him? Wasn't he good enough?

His thoughts weren't clear. They just kept jumping. He wasn't sure what he was thinking at all anymore. It all sort of jumbled together. He kept thinking about Alan and then thinking about Ethan, the two blending together. He was terrified. He didn't want to be too late again. He was too late for Alan, if he was too late for Ethan, he'd never be able to forgive himself.

Dwight didn't even flinch as a hand rested on his shoulder. He wasn't expecting it, but he didn't much care anymore. The only thing he cared about could be dead in the other room for all he knew. A moment later there was someone sitting beside him and Dwight didn't have the heart to move his head to the side. He knew who it was anyway. It was who he'd called earlier and he really didn't want to look at him. He'd lose it if he did.

"What happened?" A voice that sounded so much like Ethan's spoke.

"We went out for breakfast." Dwight didn't trust his voice over a whisper, "W-We go to breakfast most days, you know? A-And Ethan said he'd pay but I told him no, I said I would so he said he'd drive. I should've driven. He might be okay if I'd driven. Why didn't I drive?"

"Okay." The boy next to him wrapped an arm around Dwight's shoulders, "But, what happened?"

"I'm so sorry Evan. I'm so, so sorry."

"Shh. You didn't hurt him. I know you didn't. My brother loves you. You just need to calm down, and tell me what's going on."

Dwight nodded slowly, taking a deep breath. He didn't want to relive it, but he knew he had to as tears started to well in his eyes, "He was driving us home. We were only a street over, ten minutes from Dalton a-and this car came round the corner a-and it hit us. I know Ethan had right of way. I know he did. He's the best driver I've ever seen. T-The care hit Ethan's side. His head was bleeding and he wasn't moving."

Evan stared at him, frozen. Dwight didn't even register it though, the images flooding his head again and suddenly, he couldn't stop the tears anymore. He pulled Evan to his chest, crying softly into his shoulder, "I-I'm sorry. I'm so sorry…"

"No. Dwight, don't blame yourself for this. Not for one second, okay? You weren't the one who drove the car into him." Evan quickly hugged Dwight, rubbing his back soothingly, "He's going to pull through this, for us. He'll pull through because he knows there's no Tweedledum without Tweedledee, and he's going to pull through for you because you have your whole lives ahead of you."

"When they let us in, you can go in first, okay?" Dwight whispered softly, clinging to Evan. He just needed some form of human contact and this was the best he could get.

"No, it's okay. You can."

"No." Dwight quickly shook his head, "Once I get in there, I'm not leaving. S-So you have your time, just you and him and then I'll go in there."

There was a small smile on Evan's face as he pulled away from the hug, resting his head on Dwight's shoulder, "Hey, Dwight?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm glad he chose you."

"So am I." Dwight looked down at the floor, "Do you think he knows he's not alone?"

"He's wearing the promise ring you gave him, Dwight. He knows."

Dwight had almost forgotten about that ring. The ring he'd given to Ethan one night, when he took him out to the Dalton courtyards, finding one tree. The special tree that Dwight went to to think. He'd set up a picnic there. One of their first dates and Dwight already knew he wanted to give Ethan that ring. He hadn't seen Ethan without that ring on since that night.

"Thank you." Dwight murmured softly, resting his head against the wall.

"Anytime."

x X x

It was hours before they finally came out to talk to them. Dwight wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not. Looking at his watch he realised it was already four o'clock. Where had the day gone? Most of it was spent staring at that wall. He wanted to go back to the morning and be in bed with Ethan, and just stay there. Insist they stayed home.

He kept thinking about what they'd be doing right now instead. They probably would've just had a lazy day in bed. Ethan would have his arms wrapped firmly around Dwight, brushing their noses together. He did that a lot when they were really close to each other. It felt nice. It always made Dwight smile. Dwight would look up into his eyes, close the distance between them in a gentle kiss. No words between them.

Or maybe they would've been doing more than that, kissing rough, and passionate, hands roaming over each other's bodies. They could've been moving together, creating the right amount of friction to set each other on edge. They could've been screaming together as they lost themselves in the moment, in themselves, in everything.

Dwight liked to think that they would've been curled up together under the blankets, eating junkfood, not paying attention to the bad movies on TV, and pressing gentle kisses to each other's hands, cheeks, necks, noses, lips. They'd just be wrapped up in each other, laughing, smiling, falling asleep in each others arms. In a perfect world.

But this wasn't a perfect world. This was a cruel world. This was a world that seemed to like nothing more than to torture Dwight, to give him something, let him fall in love with it and then taking it away just as quickly. He was sick of it. He was tired of always being the one left behind. He was tired of being just a little bit too late. He was sick or the maybes and the what ifs. He didn't want Ethan to be another maybe. He didn't want Ethan to be another person the world took away from him.

Evan was fighting. He couldn't sit still while they waited. He started by pacing the small waiting room hallway. Back and force. His arms were crossed tightly over his chest as he frowned, focusing on the floor. Dwight had no idea what was going through the other Tweedle's head. He didn't know.

Evan just kept thinking about what it would be like. Could be like. Ethan could be dying. Ethan could be dead. All those times they shared together, they could be gone. They were so close. They finished each others sentences. This wasn't the way it was supposed to end. They were supposed to die together, old and grey. It wasn't supposed to be like this. It couldn't. Evan wouldn't let it.

He would stop every doctor or nurse that walked passed. He'd ask, he'd beg them to tell him if Ethan was okay. They'd all tell him they didn't know and that they'd find out for him as soon as they could. They never came back. Evan figured they didn't care. They were focusing on other people, like they didn't think Ethan mattered, but he did. He was the most important thing in the world.

Dwight just sat in his seat. He couldn't fight anymore. He had let that all out during the crash, while they were getting Ethan out. He had nothing left in him. No will. No strength. He was running on empty as he stared at the cold off white hospital walls. That white was enough to drive you crazy if you stared at it long enough, he was sure.

He didn't bother getting up to talk to the doctor that came out to greet them. He let Evan, and just listened, only taking in some parts of the conversation. Evan was insistent on the information. He wanted to know every detail. The thing was, he really didn't. Dwight knew deep down that Evan wouldn't want to know. He wished he could form the words to tell him that though but he just couldn't get them to come out.

He only got small details. The gash in his leg would heal, it would be fine in time. He had a cracked rib, and concussion. He wasn't awake. He had been for a little while though. That hurt. Knowing that Ethan had been awake and he hadn't been there to look after him. He said he wouldn't leave him, but they made him. They said he needed to get some sleep and that they would monitor him over night, but that he should be out of the hospital soon.

He got out lucky they said. Dwight almost wanted to laugh at that. Ethan got out lucky. He was in the hospital with a cracked rib, blood spilling from his leg and head, but he got out lucky? How was that lucky? Dwight was the lucky one, but he'd never felt like he'd lost so much. Not since Alan.

There was one piece of information that caught Dwight's attention above all others. They could see him now. It was eating at him. He needed to see him. He needed to know that Ethan was okay, but he knew that once he got in there, he wasn't going to be able to let go. Clenching his fists, and biting down roughly on his lip until he was sure he could taste blood, he closed his eyes, taking a deep breath.

Evan pressed his hand to Dwight's shoulder, "Are you sure you don't want to come in with me?"

Dwight shook his head, tears welling in his eyes but he wouldn't let them come. He couldn't. Not again, "Y-You go. Let me know when you're ready for me."

When the doctor took Evan to the room, he just stared at the closed door for a moment, unsure of what to do. He wanted to go in there. He wanted to make sure his brother was okay, but he wasn't sure he was ready to see his brother in such a bad state. He looked at the pale blue door a little longer, trying to figure out how he was supposed to act when he saw him, how he was supposed to feel.

Eventually he had to though and as he opened the door, he couldn't help but shut his eyes, taking a deep breath. He looked at the floor when he finally did open his eyes, his hands shaking. He was so scared. He didn't know what state he was about to find his brother in but he knew it couldn't be good. When he finally looked up and his breath hitched. There were wires going into his arm and it almost made Evan sick, just looking at it. Ethan was paler than usual and there was a bandage wrapped firmly around his head. His eyes were loosely closed and his hands were laying lifelessly beside him.

Evan's eyes immediately filled with tears. He couldn't stop them as they just kept spilling from his eyes. He moved on impulse, not really realising what he was doing as he walked over to Ethan's bed. The first thing he did was take Ethan's hand, shuddering as he noticed the stark contrast between their skin tones.

He pulled up the chair nearby and sat beside Ethan. His eyes closed as he gripped Ethan's hand tightly, his head slumping forward. He couldn't hold the tears in anymore. He couldn't hide it anymore. He had to cry. He cried for everything. He cried for what he could be missing with Ethan and he cried because he wasn't there to protect him. He failed him as a brother. He wasn't sure what it was he was supposed to do, but he knew it was something, if he could just figure out what it was.

He looked up at Ethan's sleeping body, murmuring into his hand, "I'm so sorry I wasn't there. I'm sorry this happened. I wish it was me…"

x X x

Dwight kept staring at the wall. He couldn't help it. It was easier than focusing on what was happening. The pale white colour seemed to go on forever. It was like he could stare deeper and deeper into it but it never ended. Like running down a never ending hallway. If he turned back, he'd be left with the reality of his situation, the madness, the chaos,and the fear. The more he moved into t hallway though, running further and further, he would get more lost in the whiteness.

While he was stuck in that hallway, staring into the white wall, he had so much time to think. He couldn't not think. All that was on his mind was Ethan. He kept wondering what he was supposed to do now. He had to help him but he didn't know how to anymore. Maybe if he was awake, he'd know what to do next but as like as Ethan was asleep, Dwight felt completely and utterly useless.

He wondered what Ethan would think when he woke up. He'd wonder if Ethan would hate him. He left. He didn't mean to but he did and he felt so sick inside because he promised Ethan he wouldn't go anywhere. Dwight was supposed to have stayed right there with him through everything. He wasn't supposed to have let go of his hand. He should've still been holding it. It felt wrong not to be able to hold his hand. He needed to be threading their fingers together and he needed to be telling Ethan he loved him.

It felt lke an eternity sitting in that room, staring at that wall as he waited for Evan to come back and tell him he could see him. Dwight flinched as Evan pressed a hand to his shoulder, waking hiim from his day dreams and there were tear stains running down Evan's face. Dwight's heart sunk when he saw those tear stains. He wasn't sure what that meant. Dwight had seen the worst though, right? He was actually there. He saw the blood, he felt it on his fingers. There was no way it could be any worse than that…could it?

"Y-You can come in now." Evan sniffled, reaching out for Dwight's hand. It took him a moment to actually take Evan's hand. He just stared at it for a moment, unsure of if he should or shouldn't.

He hesitantly got up from his seat, his legs shaking. Maybe if he took it slow, he could make it. It was like the long walk to the gallows. He felt like the closer he got, the further away from happiness he was going. Ethan was his happiness though. He couldn't just not go. He had to get there, he had to go to him no matter how scared he was. He was always meant to be the strong one.

As they got to the room, Dwight looked at the floor for a moment. The guilt was creeping up on him again. He felt like he'd failed Ethan somehow. He hadn't done enough. Maybe he could've done something more. There was no way he could be sure of what it was he could've done. The what ifs and maybes just started rushing through his mind again.

When he caught sight of Ethan, he felt like crying all over again. He was scared. He looked so pale. It felt wrong seeing Ethan like that. Ethan was usually so strong but as Dwight looked at his sleeping body, he looked so fragile. He looked like something, anything could send him over the edge and truly break him. He couldn't let go. He had to stay with him. Forever. He had to look after him.

Dwight moved over to the seat, taking Ethan's hand and shivering as he noticed their skin nearly matching in colour. It was all so wrong. His first instinct was to kiss Ethan's knuckles. He wanted Ethan to grip his hand back. He wanted Ethan to squeeze his hand gently and rub his thumb along his skin like he had been before.

Dwight couldn't trust his voice above a whisper but he had to say something, he had to talk and hope that Ethan could hear him, "I love you. I love you so much Ethan, please wake up. I need you. I need you to be here with me. We have to do all those things we promised each other we'd do." He rubbed his thumb gently along Ethan's hand, taking a shuddering breath, "I'm sorry I didn't drive. I'm sorry I didn't save you Ethan, I'm so sorry."

Dwight stayed there for hours. He had to. He refused to leave. Evan stayed by his side, holding Ethan's hand from time to time. Whenever Evan held Ethan's hand, Dwight ran his hand along his arm. He did anything to just brush their skin together. He needed it.

When the nurse came in and told them they had to leave, Dwight panicked. He couldn't. He promised he wouldn't leave before, there was no way he was going to leave now. He had to stay and make sure nothing happened to him. They would only let one of them stay though and Dwight knew it should've been Evan. He just didn't want to let go.

He held tightly to Ethan's hand, "P-Please. Just a little longer. Please, I need to stay a little bit more. I need to be here when he wakes up."

Evan looked down at the floor sadly, "You stay, okay? And you call me the second he wakes up."

Dwight stared at Evan for a moment, trying to find the right words, "It's okay."

"No. I want you to stay here. It's you and him now. Has been for a while and yeah, he's my brother, but you're the love of his life and he needs you right now, not me."

A moment of silence passed between them before Dwight pulled Evan into a tight hug, "Thank you. Thank you so much."

"Just look after him."


	5. Chapter 5

_Chapter 5_

Dwight fell asleep. He didn't mean to. He'd spent most of the night awake, whispering to Ethan and humming that same soft melody he'd hummed in the ambulance on the way over there. He had to keep himself busy so that he could stay awake but as the early hours of the morning came closer, Dwight's eyes were struggling more and more to stay open.

He had only closed his eyes for a moment. He figured if he closed them for a moment or two, he could keep them open for a lot longer. The logic was there in his brain but as his eyelids got heavier and heavier, he couldn't open them again, resting his head on Ethan's chest, his finges still threaded through the Tweedle's.

He stayed asleep for a long time, not realising just how tired he was. The smallest of movements was enough to wake him though. The one thing that did finally wake him was his hand being squeezed. He smiled softly, squeezing back. He sighed happily, smelling the ever familiar scent of Ethan, soothing him. Then he realised. He felt Ethan squeeze his hand.

He slowly opened his eyes, hesitantly looking up at Ethan. He had absolutely no idea what time it was but it was light out. As he looked up, he squeezed Ethan's hand again, murmuring under his breath, almost scared to break he moment, "E-Ethan?"

Ethan's eyes fluttered open just barely, moving his head to the side to look at Dwight. He smiled softly, squeezing Dwight's hand again. Dwight's heart raced and he quickly lifted his head up, moving his free hand up and down Ethan's arm soothingly. He couldn't believe it. He was awake. He was awake and he smiled and he was going to be okay.

"Hey…you scared me."

Ethan went to speak but his throat was so dry and his head was aching so much, he couldn't concentrate. He didn't know why he was there. He didn't know for sure where 'there' was. He also wasn't a hundred percent certain why Dwight was there, holding his hand.

Dwight realised what was wrong and quickly grabbed the water next to Ethan's bed, handing it to him and earning an appreciative smile. He watched Ethan sip the water and bit his lip, smiling softly. Ethan was okay. He was there and he was awake and he was okay. Dwight couldn't quite believe it. He was going to be okay. They could get passed this together.

"I stayed with you as long as they would let me."

Ethan raised his eyebrows, staring at Dwight a little confused for a moment. He didn't get it. Why was Dwight being so nice to him all of a sudden? Where was he? Why did his head pound so much? "I…what happened?"

Dwight smiled sadly, shuffling closer and carefully ran his hand through Ethan's hair, "We were coming home from breakfast. A car hit us, hit your side, but it's okay, because you're awake and that means you're going to be okay because I'm going to look after you. I promise."

Ethan almost cringed, leaning away from Dwight's touch. It was weird and he wasn't sure whether he liked it or not. Dwight wasn't the affectionate type and yet there he was, running a hand through his hair and holding his tightly in the other.

Ethan said the first thing he could think to say, "Where's Evan?"

That hurt, just a little bit. Ethan didn't seem to care. He didn't seem to take in Dwight fully, he just wanted to know where his brother was. Dwight looked down at the floor, trying not to show just how hurt he was. He didn't want Ethan to know. He just wasn't himself yet. That was all. He needed time to adjust to everything that had happened. It was perfectly normal.

"D-Do you want me to call him? I can tell him to come down here." Dwight offered, smiling softly.

Ethan nodded quickly, wincing softly as pain shot through his head. Dwight moved on impulse, quickly getting to Ethan's side, "Be careful." He whispered, pressing a delicate kiss to Ethan's forehead. "Don't want you hurting yourself anymore."

This time, Ethan did flinch. He gently pressed his hand to Dwight's chest, pushing him away. Ethan had never pushed him away before. It hurt. It was almost more than he could bear. He'd been through so much with Ethan in the last twenty four hours and Ethan pushing him away just made him feel mose useless, more worthless.

"…W-What are you doing?"

"I-I'm trying to comfort you. I'm sorry…." Dwight looked away guiltily. He felt almost sick. This wasn't the way this was supposed to be. Ethan was supposed to wake up and Dwight was supposed to look after him until Ethan yelled at him to just relax.

"It's…it's really flattering Dwight, but that's what my brother is for. Frankly, you're being…way more affectionate than I ever expected you of all people to be."

"I don't understand." Dwight spoke softly, his lip quivering as his grip on Ethan's hand loosened, "I love you, I'm just trying to protect you."

"You love me!" Ethan stared at Dwight in shock, "S-Since when have you loved me?"

"For six months! I've loved you since the day we got together Ethan, I tell you every single day! Don't act like you don't know. If this is some idea of a joke, it's not funny, so please stop." Dwight almost begged, his eyes filling with tears. He was so scared. He didn't know what was going on or how he was supposed to fix it.

"Six…what? You and me? Together? Like, together together?" Ethan's eyebrows rose further as he stared at Dwight, "We're not together Dwight, we never have been."

Dwight's heart sank in his chest, but he couldn't hold in his anger, "You love me! You tell me so every single day! You're wearing the damn ring I gave you on our third date!"

Ethan's eyes immediately moved to his hand, brushing his finger along the simple silver band on his finger. It had tiny little flecks of gold in it, scattered throughout the sinver. "H-How…?"

"You're my boyfriend! Don't say you can't remember, Ethan. Please. I need you. I need you to remember me and all the things we've done together. You can't forget the future we had planned!"

Ethan just kept staring at the ring. He was sure he'd never seen it before in his life. He'd not been wearing it before he woke up and suddenly there it was, suddenly, there Dwight was. Dwight was so clingy and scared and attached to him. He had to wonder why. Why was Dwight so close? He was absolutely terrified. How much had he forgotten to have lost an entire relationship? Maybe it wasn't true though. He'd need Evan to tell him for sure.

Looking up at Dwight reluctantly, Ethan smiled, "Can you please call Evan for me? I-I need to see my brother."

"Oh. Okay." Dwight stared at the floor, his voice coming out as a quiet whisper. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. This was almost worse than losing him. He had Ethan right there in front of him but he wasn't allowed to kiss him. Maybe it was the stress of the situation. Maybe if Dwight gave him a little while, he might remember.

Dwight pulled the chair away from Ethan's side, pulling his phone out of his pocket and dialling Evan's number. It wasn't long before he picked up.

"Dwight? Is he awake?"

"Yeah…yeah, he's awake. Evan…he doesn't remember us."

"What do you mean?"

Dwight looked over at Ethan, his voice cracking as he finally started breaking, "He can't remember that he loves me."

There was a pause on the other end of the phone and Dwight felt sick. He didn't know what he was supposed to do now. He hadn't expected anything like this to happen.

"I'll be there soon. Just look after him."

"How?"

"The same way you always do."

Dwight reluctantly closed his phone, slipping it back in his pocket. He looked up at Ethan, seeing the hint of fear in his eyes, "I-I'll wait outside."

"No!" Ethan wasn't even sure why he reacted the way he did but he couldn't just let Dwight leave, "Stay. Please."

Dwight looked down at the floor, his heart aching. He wanted to rush over to him. He wanted to crawl onto that hospital bed, hugging him and resting his head on his chest. He wanted to tell Ethan he loved him and that he would keep him safe through everything. He couldn't though. He had to stay away. He had to give Ethan space and keep his distance.

It was like he wasn't Ethan's rock anymore and when he looked into his eyes, he didn't see the same love he had all those times before. It felt wrong. As he realised just how useless he was to Ethan, he broke. He couldn't hold in the emotions anymore. He was supposed to be strong for Ethan but now Ethan didn't need him, didn't want him and it hurt Dwight so much, he just crumbled. Tears were already spilling down his cheeks and he couldn't quite bring himself to look at Ethan anymore. It felt wrong. It felt like he was looking at someone else. That same glow was there, that glow that made him fall in love with him, but it didn't feel like him anymore. How could he forget? Everything they'd been through and he just forgets?

Dwight sat in the chair, a good distance left between the too of them and let his head fall as he silently cried. He cried for everything he and Ethan had. Everything they'd lost. He cried because there was nothing else he could do and the tension just kept building up.

"Dwight…?" Ethan bit his lip, looking over at Dwight warily. He never meant to upset him. He didn't know how to fix it but he couldn't just leave him like that, "Dwight, come here."

Dwight sniffled, looking up and wiping his eyes quickly. His whole body was shaking as he stared at Ethan for a moment, trying to figure out whether or not he actually should go to him. Ethan told him to though, and he could never deny Ethan. Hesitantly, he got up from his seat, taking slow, timid steps towards Ethan. He wasn't sure what Ethan wanted, wasn't sure he really wanted to know.

Ethan patted the bed next to him, smiling reassuringly, "Sit down."

Dwight just stared at the bed for a moment, unsure of what to do. What was he supposed to say? He couldn't even find words, so instead simply did as he was told. He didn't look at Ethan just sat down, staring at his hands as he wrung his fingers together nervously. He had no idea what he was doing, or why. Tears were still falling down his cheeks but he didn't care anymore. He'd gotten to the point where he just felt numb.

Ethan started sitting up, wincing softly as pain shot through his leg. Dwight moved on instinct. He quickly leant over to Ethan, brushing his hand over his arm, "No. Be careful."

Ethan shook his head, brushing his hand over Dwight's reassuringly, "I'm fine. Just a little dizzy."

Dwight ran his fingers down Ethan's arm, trying to make the contact last. He didn't want to let Ethan go. He'd had him for so long now and he meant it when he said Ethan was all he had left. He couldn't just let Ethan get taken away from him. "J-Just…I don't want you getting worse."

"I'm in the hospital, Dwight. If anything happens, I'm in the right place to get help."

Dwight looked down at the bed, picking at the blanket. He didn't know why Ethan called him over. He wanted everything to go back to the way it was. Ethan grabbed Dwight's wrist, pulling him over to him and Dwight took a long, deep breath, "W-What are you doing?"

Ethan wrapped his arms around Dwight, hugging him tightly, "I'm trying to comfort you." He wiped a few of the tears from Dwight's cheeks, murmuring softly, "I don't like seeing you crying."

Dwight sniffled, looking up into Ethan's eyes. He leant forward before catching himself, realising what he was doing. He wasn't allowed to. He wanted to so badly but he couldn't, "See, you're doing that thing where you make me want to kiss you…only this time, I'm not allowed to."

"Dwight…" Ethan looked away, sighing sadly, "I'm flattered, believe me, I am…but how could you and I ever work?"

Dwight whimpered, his lip quivering. It hurt so much to hear him say that. He never wanted to hear him say it. It was like a break up. Only this was a little bit worse because it was as though they really had broken up. They weren't together, because how could Dwight be with Ethan when Ethan didn't want it?

"We made it work." Dwight's voice was a whisper, tears falling down his cheeks again, "We're two sides of a coin. You make me strong and you make me do things I'd never normally do, and I keep you grounded. We're a team."

"We're a team? You and me?" Ethan looked right into Dwight's eyes as he asked. He didn't want to upset Dwight, he was just so confused. He needed the answers. He looked away for a moment, grabbing Dwight's hand and squeezing it gently.

Dwight couldn't help it, he blurted out the words without thinking, "I love you."

Ethan smiled softly and Dwight swore he saw a glimpse of his Ethan again. Just for a moment, but then Ethan was looking away, biting his lip as he stuttered hesitantly, "I…I-I can't…I can't say that when I can't remember any of it. I'm sorry."

Dwight wrapped his arms around Ethan, hugging him tightly and burying his face in his neck, crying softly, "I'm so sorry. It should've been me…"

"No." Ethan rubbed Dwight's back, sighing sadly, "Don't you ever think that."

"I should've driven." Dwight whispered, "I should've driven and let you pay. It should've been me, not you. I should have left it alone."

"You're going to drive yourself crazy with this."

"I'm already crazy without you." Dwight murmured so softly, Ethan almost couldn't hear it.

"I'm right here."

"It's not the same." Dwight pulled away, looking at the floor, "You're not in love with me anymore."

"I never was."

"Don't you dare say that!" Dwight stood up, glaring at Ethan. He'd never been so angry with him before. He'd never wanted to scream at him and call him anything less than beautiful. He was just at the end of his tether. He couldn't take it anymore. He just wanted his Ethan back, "Maybe you didn't love me at first, but you loved me enough to initiate our first kiss. You loved me enough to take me on our first date. You loved me enough to show me everything and to take me through it. You loved me enough to plan our future, getting a house together, getting married, having kids. We had it all planned because we love each other so don't you dare for one second say you never loved me!"

Ethan looked away guiltily but Dwight couldn't get himself to look at him for long. He couldn't stand that room anymore. He had to get out. He started walking towards the door but stopped in his tracks as he saw Evan standing there, looking at him curiously. He didn't want to explain. Especially not with Ethan right there in the room with them. He couldn't breathe in that space anymore and pushed his way out of his room, murmuring just loud enough for Evan to hear, "I'll be outside."


	6. Chapter 6

_Chapter 6_

Evan wasn't sure what to think, walking into the room to see that. He only heard the last part of Dwight's outburst but it hurt just hearing it. He couldn't quite imagine how the hunter was feeling. If Ethan really couldn't remember, Dwight would be heartbroken. He didn't know how he was supposed to console him, but he had to focus on Ethan right now. Ethan looked so confused, so scared.

Evan quickly made his way to the bed, grabbing Ethan's hand and doing his best to smile reassuringly. His skin was already gaining it's colour. Evan felt so relieved. He was really okay, "I was so worried about you."

"What the hell is going on?" Ethan rubbed the bandage on his head, groaning softly, "He's mad, right? This is all some crazy practical joke that you somehow got Dwight in on, isn't it?"

Evan looked at the floor, biting his lip. He didn't know how he was supposed to tell Ethan. He wasn't sure exactly what he was supposed to say. He looked up into Ethan's soft blue eyes, taking a deep breath. He looked so scared, so confused. He really had no idea what was going on. He couldn't be sure before because this was Ethan and he could very easily play a really terrible joke on them. "I…umm…what's the last thing you remember?"

"Waking up here." Ethan shrugged, scratching the back of his neck as he took a moment to try and figure it out. What happened before he was here, "I…I was with you…at Dalton, and we went to bed like we always did, and then I woke up here." He frowned, tilting his head to the side, "But that doesn't feel right when I say it out loud."

Evan grabbed the chair, pulling it to Ethan's side and took a moment to find his thoughts, "Okay. This is going to be really weird for you, but you are in love with him. Maybe you don't remember it but you have to feel it, even a little bit."

Ethan stared at the door Dwight had just walked out. Maybe. It was possible, wasn't it? In some way? He always thought he was kind of cute, the way he'd panic over the most trivial of things. Ethan always found his need to protect others very endearing…but love? Could he ever really love Dwight? That seemed like such an extreme. He still wasn't sure it was true, but Evan said so. His brother would never lie to him.

He couldn't speak much higher than a whisper, "I feel…drawn to him. I want to look after him."

Evan smiled fondly, "That means a part of you still remembers, right? We'll talk to the doctors but I'm sure your memories are going to come back in time. Try not to give up on him while you wait, okay? He needs you just as much as you need him."

"I don't need him."

"Oh believe me, you do." Evan chuckled softly, gently squeezing Ethan's hand, "You'll realise that soon enough."

"No. I need you. I need my brother." Ethan pulled Evan closer, wrapping his arms around him and hugging him tightly, "You weren't here when I woke up…"

Evan smiled sadly, "I wanted to be, but if you had your memories, you would've wanted Dwight here more than me and they only let one of us stay."

"Never." Ethan squeezed Evan tightly, burying his face in his neck, "No one will be more important to me than you. Maybe, if this is true, he might be equal in importance, but never more."

Evan's heart swelled, unable to stop the bright smile that slipped onto his lips. He and Ethan were always so close, he was alwaystrying to look out for him. Sure, he was only two minutes older than Ethan but that made him the big brother. That meant he had to protect him. He sighed softly, emotions bubbling up inside him and his voice cracked, "I love you."

"I love you too." Ethan looked up at Evan, smiling brightly. He brushed hair from Evan's eyes, looking directly into them as he spoke very sure of himself, "I'm sorry I scared you, but I'm not going anywhere."

Tears pricked at Evan's eyes but he couldn't let them fall. He wouldn't. "You promise?"

Ethan chuckled softly, nodding, "I promise."

Evan couldn't hold it in anymore. Those two simple words were enough to make him break because he needed Ethan. He needed him so much and there was no way he was going to let him go anywhere anyway. Ethan's reassurance made the whole situation seem more real somehow. He hugged Ethan as tightly as he could, tears falling down his cheeks, "I was so scared we were going to lose you."

"I'm so sorry." Ethan gently rubbed his hand along Evan's back, trying to reassure him, "I'm here. I'm right here and I always will be."

Evan took a long shuddering breath, trying to stop himself crying. He was meant to be the strong one but there he was, crying. That's the way it usually seemed to be, though. He may have been the older brother, he may have been the one who was supposed to look after them and keep them strong, but most of the time, it was Ethan keeping them strong. It was Ethan comforting him. It was always Ethan. He would be nothing without Ethan and that thought itself almost scared him except that was the way it had always been. He didn't know any different. It would do anything for his brother and he knew Ethan would do just the same.

Ethan closed his eyes for a moment, trying to figure out everything that was happening. Maybe he was in love with Dwight, but how? When did it happen? How did it happen? What got them to this point? If it was really love, how could he just forget it so easily?

"Evan?"

"Yeah?"

"W-Will you tell me about him? About Dwight and I?" His voice went quiet, like he wasn't sure he wanted to be asking for it. He wasn't sure any of it was true yet. It all seemed like some kind of terrible dream.

"I…I can only tell you the stuff I know which is the before…and a little of the beginning stuff." Evan looked a little apologetic, shrugging, "You don't give me all the details of you and Dwight - and I am extremely grateful for being kept in the dark, thank you."

Ethan blushed. He wasn't sure why. He just did. What was there to be embarrassed about though? This was his brother. He knew everything about him. Nodding quickly, he sat up further, eyes intent on Evan, "Tell me. Please."

Evan nodded slowly, shuffling in his seat, trying to figure out where to start. Where had Ethan and Dwight started? He didn't really know for sure where to begin, "I…umm…well, you started talking about Dwight after we caught him singing. You kept saying that you thought he had the most beautiful voice you'd ever heard." Evan smiled fondly, remembering he way Ethan would flop backwards into the bed, grabbing a pillow and clinging to it as he grinned, talking about the way Dwight sung that day.

"You would…you'd stop in the middle of the hallway. You'd grab my arm to get me to stop with you, and I'd just watch as you tilted your head a little and watch Dwight walk passed. I swear you drooled once. I don't care that you won't admit it." Evan laughed.

Ethan blushed more, looking at the blankets. He bit his lip to stop himself smiling. It sounded nice, but that was just it. It sounded nice. It didn't mean it was true. It didn't mean he felt anything when Evan told him about it. He would admit that it made his heart flutter a little. It made him a little dazed and it made him think about Dwight a lot more but that didn't mean love. That didn't mean any of the feelings Evan was describing were necessarily real.

He chewed his lip nervously, "What else?"

Evan tilted his head a little, watching Ethan carefully, "Uh…well, you said to me that you had to do something. He was all you thought about, you were so crazy about him. You filled his room with roses. He got really scared when you did that. You know how paranoid Dwight can be. He sprayed you with his holy water. So you told him. You initiated everything."

Ethan frowned, "So…he didn't like me?"

"No! No, he did. He does. He's just Dwight. Dwight never knows when he's allowed to do things or whether or not he'll make himself look stupid so he never does anything. He was very grateful when you finally made the first move."

Ethan smiled softly, imagining how awkward Dwight would've been. That did make a lot of sense. Maybe it was true. Maybe he had initiated everything. Maybe he was crazy for Dwight. Maybe. "What happened after that?"

"You came back to our room and proceeded to tell me about how perfect his lips are. All night long." Evan rolled his eyes, "Kept going on about how soft they are and warm and how good they tasted. Then you kept talking about how he was an amazing kisser for his first time. I swear, I was going to kick you out of the room."

"Sounds amazing." Ethan looked down at the ring on his finger, taking a deep breath. He twisted it gently on his finger, feeling unsure of himself.

"I sense a but."

"No. Just…sounds too good to be true." Ethan smiled a little sadly.

"It is true." Evan grabbed Ethan's hand, brushing his finger over his ring, "He is forever committed to you and you were to him. You are. You'll remember soon. I know you will."

"Can you…" Ethan bit his lip, unable to take his eyes away from the ring, "Can you check on him? I think I really upset him…"

"Oh. Right. O-Okay." Evan held Ethan's hand a little tighter, not wanting to let him go. Now he had his brother, he didn't want to just leave him here all alone.

Ethan seemed to pick up on it right away. He squeezed Evan's hand, smiling reassurinly, "Hey." He made sure Evan was looking at him before speaking, "I know you're scared but I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere."

Evan nodded slowly, a soft smile tugging at his lips, "Right." Evan reluctantly let go of Ethan's hand, looking back at him for a moment as he left the room, "I'll be right back. I promise."

"I'll be here."

Evan nodded slowly. He opened the door, looking around for Dwight and his heart sank. Dwight was just by the door, his back to the wall. He'd sunk to the floor with his knees pulled to his chest and his head buried in them. His whole body was shaking. Dwight was taking it so hard. Much harder than Evan had expected. But then, he couldn't imagine what Dwight was going through. To be so in love with someone and have everything taken away from you. Ethan and Dwight were inseperable, and then this happened.

He knelt down beside Dwight, brushing a hand over his back and causing him to flinch, "Hey…it's okay."

"Nothing's okay." Dwight murmured, his breath hitching as he continued to cry.

"Ethan still loves you."

"No he doesn't." Dwight looked up at Evan, his eyes red, and blotchy. He had tears streaming down his face and his hair looked so messed up, there was no way of telling just how often he'd ran his fingers through it. "He said it himself, he doesn't love me."

"He didn't mean it though. I-I mean…he did…but he didn't. Not really. He just doesn't remember, but he will." Evan assured.

"You can't know that." Dwight felt sick. His stomach was in knots. It was as though his whole life for the past six months was a lie. It was like he had nothing left. The one thing he had was taken away and every moment disappeared with it. There would be no more trips to that café. There would be no more kisses in the halls. There would be no more waking up in each other's arms and the thought of no more killed him.

"I do though. I do." Evan sighed softly, wrapping an arm around Dwight, "He's confused Dwight. Give him some time and he'll remember. He needs to get used to everything first. Do what you can to remind him. Talk to him about things."

Dwight buried his face in his knees once more, sobbing softly. He couldn't do that though. How could he tell Ethan about a life he never had? If Ethan didn't think it was real then it might as well have never been at all. It hurt so much but he couldn't force it on him. This was like a second chance for Ethan, and he was going to say no instead. He could tell Ethan didn't want him anymore.

Murmuring softly, Dwight's voice was muffled, "He doesn't want me anymore."

"He's wanted you since the day he met you." Evan murmured, rubbing Dwight's back soothingly, "He did. I remember. I could see it in the way he looked at you. So, if he still remembers you, that means he remembers that."

"R-Really? He did?" Dwight looked up at Evan, a hopeful look in his eyes.

Evan looked down at the floor, biting his lip. Truth was, he had no idea. He didn't know how long Ethan had liked Dwight. He had kept it all inside for so long, there was no real way to know for sure. He had to have liked him for a while before they got together though. He had to like him when they first met, to some degree. Evan couldn't just crush that little shred of hope left inside Dwight.

He smiled reassuringly, nodding, "Of course he did."

Dwight wiped at his tears, sniffling. He pulled Evan into a tight hug, in dire need of some human contact. He felt so lost. Normally at times like these, it was Ethan he'd turn to. Ethan would console him. Ethan would protect him. Ethan would find a way to make all the darkness become light again. He made it all feel right and now he was the one person he couldn't go to. He felt so alone.

Taking a long, shaky breath, he murmured into Evan's ear, "I can't lose him."

"You won't." Evan said sternly, looking right into Dwight's eyes, "Just talk to him. Let him adjust and sooner or later, he's going to believe you. He's going to remember it."

Dwight nodded, smiling softly, "O-Okay. I just hope he remembers. Some people never do."

"He will." Evan ruffled Dwight's hair, trying to lighten the mood, "I know he's going to remember, and if by some twist of fate, he doesn't, then you'll fall in love all over again. You and Ethan are for life. You'll find a way to make it work."

Dwight looked down at the floor. How? How in the world was he supposed to make it work if Ethan couldn't remember? As long as Ethan couldn't remember, Ethan didn't love him and as long as Ethan didn't love him, that was it. There was nothing he could do. He wouldn't force himself on Ethan. He wanted Ethan to loe him unconditionally, he didn't want it out of pity. He just wanted him. Completely. He wanted the guy he had fallen for. He wanted the guy who would pull him closer in bed, and the guy who would tell cheesy jokes when he was upset. Dwight just wanted the guy he'd given everything to.

"H-How are we getting him out of here, when they let him leave?" Dwight asked, his voice soft as he tried to stop thinking such terrible thoughts.

"I think…you don't mind if I take him, do you?" Evan chewed on his lip nervously, "It's just that he feels comfortable with me, it seems like the most obvious solution. I'd let you but that could be really awkward and uncomfortable. I don't want to put you through that."

"It's okay. That makes sense." Dwight sighed sadly. He used the wall to slide up to his feet, looking down at the floor, "I'm just going to go back to Dalton, okay?"

"You don't have to leave, Dwight."

The hunter chuckled sadly, "Yeah. I do. He doesn't need me. I'm just making things more confusing for him. He would be better off if I wasn't here. Besides, he has you to look after him. Just keep him safe, okay? I'm going to be fine." Dwight smiled softly, it not quite reaching his eyes as he started walking down the hall. He looked back, "Hey Evan?"

"Yeah?" Evan crossed his arms over his chest.

"Tell Ethan…tell him…" _Tell him I love him_, he thought. Sighing sadly and shaking his head as he started walking away again, "Don't worry."


	7. Chapter 7

_Chapter 7_

Dwight was having a hard time handling it when he got back. It was bad enough being at Dalton all alone but then Ethan came back. Everyone ran up to him and they were hugging him, asking him what happened, making sure he was okay. He was smiling so brightly and they were all so happy to see him…and Dwight couldn't do anything. He wanted so badly to go over there but he knew he couldn't.

Dwight just wanted to rush over to him and wrap his arms around him. He wanted to run a hand through his hair. He wanted to press a gentle kiss to his lips. He wanted to whisper to him that he was so glad he was okay, and that he'd keep him safe. He wanted to tell him how much he loved him. He couldn't do any of that though. The distance suddenly shoved between them was like a knife twisting in Dwight's stomach.

It was hard enough, getting used to not having Ethan around. It was even harder when Ethan was right there. Right in front of him and there was absolutely nothing he could do about it. He'd rather it that way though. He'd rather have Ethan there, with him. He'd rather be able to watch over him and make sure that he was safe than not having him at all.

It was still difficult though. He didn't realise how much he relied on Ethan being there. He hadn't noticed just how often they were around each other, even when they weren't 'together'. They were always near each other. Before, all Dwight had to do was smile the softest smile at the Tweedle and he'd come over to him, kiss his cheek, drag him off on another Warblerland adventure.

When he looked up at Ethan in the halls, and smiled softly at him, all he received in return was a small smile. He didn't like it. Yes, it was exactly what he should've been expecting and yes, he couldn't really ask any more than that from Ethan, but it didn't mean he didn't want more than that. Something. Anything. It was like the smallest of human contacts would never happen again and it hurt. It hurt so much that he couldn't do anything about it.

Evan had told him in the hospital to talk to him about things but Dwight couldn't figure out how to start talking to Ethan. The thought of actually talking to him about things was just impossible. How was he supposed to get Ethan to understand that he was and always would be in love with him? How was he supposed to make him see that it would never ever change and that he needed Ethan to feel it too?

It was only day one of having Ethan back at Dalton but it was torture. Dwight would hide in his room a lot but there were things he absolutely had to leave him room for. He had grabbed a big bag of salt from his room, intending to go around Windsor and work on the salt lines. He had to make sure they were all right. The others didn't seem to realise how important it was that he did that, how many lives he would be saving.

Ethan and Evan were sitting in the corner of the room, Ethan had the biggest grin on his face and Dwight was trying so hard not to notice it. They were all used to Dwight going around with salt every day, they almost didn't even notice he was there. Then Dwight heard that laugh. That adorable laugh that absolutely drove Dwight crazy. It made him smile so brightly and it made me want to wrap his arms around Ethan and hug him close.

He looked over at them, overhearing Evan starting the beginning of an Alice in Wonderland poem, "'Will you walk into my parlour?' said the spider to the fly, 'Tis the prettiest little parlour that ever you did spy…"

Dwight watched them closely, a smile tugging at his lips. He loved when Ethan was with Evan. He was always so relaxed, so happy. He bit his lip as Ethan's face lit up when Evan spoke. He couldn't stop grinning as he continued the poem for his brother, "The way into my parlour is up a winding stair, and I've got many curious things to show when you are there.'…"

Dwight just sat on the window sill, entranced. The look on Ethan's face was so perfect, he couldn't quite bring himself to look away. He just smiled softly, the bag of salt laying forgotten beside him on the windowsill. He rested his elbow on his knee, his face on his hand and just watched the way they interacted. They loved each other so much, you could tell. Dwight envied them that. He missed his brother so much and it was amazing for him to see Evan and Ethan together, almost the same as he and Alan used to be. Nothing could ever be the same though, but it was one of the things that reminded him of the little brother he lost three years earlier.

They spoke the last two lines together, grins on their faces, "'Oh, no, no,' said the little fly, 'to ask me is in vain, for whoever goes up your winding stair can ne'er come down again.'"

Dwight almost knew how the little fly felt. Ethan was the spider. Ethan had lured him in. He had gotten him so caught up in everything, all the good, all the promises of tomorrows and Dwight went along with it. Then suddenly the bad came and there was no way he could go back. It wasn't Ethan's fault though. He knew that. He just wished there was some way to make it better again. It was so hard to pretend he didn't want to kiss Ethan. It was so hard to act like he wasn't in love with the Tweedle, and to act like his heart didn't ache at the mere sight of him.

They laughed softly and so did the boy sitting with them. Reed Van Kamp. He was the smallest of the Windsors, at least among their group of friends. His strawberry blonde curls had a tendency to fall into his eyes from time to time and Dwight supposed that mustn't have helped with his clumsiness. Reed was without a doubt, the most accident prone guy they had ever known. He'd been known to trip on air, to walk into walls, to cut his lip on cans. You name it, chances are, Reed Van Kamp has experienced it.

In fact, as he sat there with the Tweedles, one couldn't help but noticed a little bandaid by Reed's jaw. Dwight was almost curious. He didn't like when Reed got hurt, it just seemed to be something he couldn't do anything about. Truth was, Reed was probably the one person Dwight felt most protective of, other than Ethan. So the clumsiness had a tendency to unnerve Dwight. He wasn't sure how to keep Reed safe from himself.

"So, Ethan…what was it like? The crash I mean? Y-You don't have to tell me, if you don't want to. I've just been through so many things, I'm kind of interested." Reed tilted his head to the side, his hair flopping to the side with it as he bit his lip nervously.

Dwight could tell Reed almost wanted to take it back. He felt like he was asking way too much and Dwight really didn't want to listen to this but at the same time, he wanted to know what Ethan would say. He turned away from the three of them, picking up his bag of salt again and trying to focus on fixing up the salt line at the window. He really wasn't sure he'd want to know how Ethan would answer that question.

There was a long silence in the room and Dwight glanced over to see Ethan staring right back at him. His breath caught in his throat as he took a moment to just look into those icy blue eyes. They were so perfect. He wished he could go over there and wrap Ethan up in his arms. The Tweedle looked so scared. He looked confused. He didn't know what to say, Dwight could tell. He couldn't so anything though. He had to leave them alone. It was easier that way.

He was trying to annoyed that knife twisting in his gut feeling that had come back. He had relived in in his mind a million times over, trying to imagine what it would be like if he had done something differently. He didn't know anymore. He was sure that he could've done something to have stopped it but it didn't seem to be coming to him at all.

Ethan's voice was soft, his voice cracking as he spoke, "I-I don't…I don't really remember anything."

"Right." Reed looked down at the floor, picking at his trousers absentmindedly, "Sorry."

"D-Dwight was there." Ethan murmured.

It was like suddenly Evan and Reed realised he was there the moment he said it. Dwight froze in his place, almost afraid to turn around, certain they were watching him now. He carefully finished the salt line, trying to pretend he hadn't heard Etan's words. He was sure they knew he did though. Anyone could tell by the way he was acting.

He knew he had to look. There was only so long he could hold off but he tried. he took his time to slowly close off the top of the bag, keeping his head down. Maybe they'd forget he was there.

"Dwight?" Ethan's voice was still that same soft tone and Dwight melted just a little. It was so sweet, so innocent, how could he not? It was like Ethan was a afraid to ask Dwight. He didn't want to know just as much as Dwight didn't want to tell him but Reed wanted to know and yeah, Dwight knew Reed didn't necessarily need to know but they couldn't just leave him with no answers. That wouldn't be fair on him, and he had been polite about asking, making sure it wouldn't hurt Ethan's feelings.

Dwight hesitantly, turned to face them, "Yeah?"

Ethan bit his lip, tilting his head just a little and Dwight was putty in his hands. Whenever Ethan did that, he was. He'd do anything for him. There was something about that, it was so cute and Dwight just couldn't deny it anything. He shuffled a little closer on the windowsill, smiling reassuringly.

"W-What happened? In the crash?"

Dwight looked at the floor, wringing his hands together and took a deep breath, "You really want to know?"

Reed spoke softly, "You don't ha-"

Ethan quickly cut him off, shaking head, "No, I want to know too."

Dwight nodded slowly, "Okay." He took another deep breath, trying to remember it. He knew he'd never forget it but that didn't mean it made sense in his head. It was fast and slow at the same time. It blurred. He still wasn't entirely sure about all of it. He wasn't exactly in the best state of mind as it happened.

"We were coming home from breakfast. I-I asked you if you loved me. If you'd always love me." Dwight looked straight into Ethan's eyes as he said that.

"What did I say?"

"You said, 'forever.' You were holding my hand and you turned to me and asked me what was wrong." Dwight swallowed the lump in his throat, "A-And then I looked up at you and I saw the car coming at us but it was too late. I couldn't stop it."

"What happened after that?" Ethan was staring at Dwight so intently he was almost self concious about it. His hands shook, trying to think about it. Trying to get through it for Ethan's sake.

"It's kind of a blur after that. Just a really loud crushing sound and I hit my leg and my head against the side of the car. You weren't moving so I made sure you were breathing, tried to wake you up and then I called an ambulance." Dwight's voice cracked as tears filled his eyes, "I-I'm sorry. I need to finish with the salt." He murmured, using the salt as an excuse to leave the room. He quickly grabbed the bag, walking out as fast as he could for it to be considered normal, but it didn't matter. They knew why he was really leaving. He couldn't even bring himself to keep the tears from spilling down his cheeks.

"Wait! I'm sorry!" Reed quickly ran after Dwight, calling his name and Dwight relucantly turned to face Reed, quick to wipe away his tears. He kept rushing towards Dwight, tripping and falling into him. Dwight reached out just in time to catch him.

Dwight acted on instinct. He quickly pulled Reed to his feet, looking carefully at him, and resting a hand on his shoulder, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

"You're not supposed to run Reed. We've been through this."

"I can run if I want to." Reed grumbled, brushing his hair out of his eyes, "I'm sorry, okay?"

"What for?"

Reed shuffled nervously, "I upset you. I didn't mean to. I shouldn't have asked. I didn't mean to pry, and I'm sorry."

"Dude, relax. It's okay. You didn't upset me." Dwight sighed, raking his hand through his hair, "It's this whole situation that has me like this, not you. Believe me, I've relived that in my head so many times, one more time isn't going to hurt me."

Reed nodded slowly, raising an eyebrow, "Are you sure? I know you Dwight. You bottle things up."

Dwight looked away guiltily. It was true. He was hiding a lot of it inside, but what else could he do? There was far too much to just let it all out. It was too much pain. He needed time. He needed to figure out what he was supposed to do next. Usually he'd have Ethan there to help him, but Ethan being the thing that's got him so worked up makes it so much more difficult.

Dwight rubbed his eyes tiredly, "I'm fine Reed. Promise."

Reed pulled Dwight into a tight hug. Dwight was never one for displays of affection. He didn't like hand shakes. He didn't like hugs. He didn't like when people would greet you with a kiss on the cheek or anything like that, but it was different with Reed. Reed was just the opposite. He loved to hug people, to make sure they were okay. Reed was selfless like that. It was one of the reasons Dwight looked up to him so much. So when Reed hugged him, he let it take away some of the pain. He let it add another stitch to the wounds he was sealing up.

"I'll come by later with juice and cake and we'll have our own camp out in your room, okay?"

Dwight chuckled softly, "Not necessary."

"Not taking no for an answer." Reed replied sternly, "You need a friend right now, so I'm going to help you out."

Dwight smiled fondly. It was true. He did. He was in dire need of a friend at that moment. He didn't really have anyone he could call a friend in the first place. He was always locking himself away in the room. He preferred it in his room. He knew it was safe. He knew he'd be okay. So what was the point in leaving?

Reed understood that though, and he liked to make sure Dwight was okay despite all that. He liked to know that Dwight wasn't lonely, and now that Ethan wasn't looking at Dwight the same way anymore, Reed really wanted to look after him, to make sure it would be okay for the hunter.

Dwight nodded again, hugging Reed once more, "Thank you."

"Any time." Reed smiled brightly, "I'll see you later."

"Okay."

Dwight watched Reed leave for a moment, turning around and freezing in his spot as he spotted Ethan looking back at him. He couldn't help but look right back into those eyes. He wanted to go over there and ask him what was wrong. He wanted to take the sad look off of his face. He wanted to make sure everything was okay. He hated seeing that look on Ethan's face.

It felt weird, not being able to look after Ethan. Normally it was so simple. He didn't even have to go to Ethan, he'd come straight to him. Normally Ethan would wrap his arms around him, bury his face in his neck and murmur in Dwight's ear all the things that are wrong. Dwight wouldn't always know what to say, but sometimes Ethan didn't even need words. He just needed the closeness and Dwight was always ready to give him that.

Now though, now there was this never ending divide. Dwight couldn't get rid of it and as Ethan hesitantly raised his hand and waved at him from down the hall, Dwight's stomach churned. It should be so much more than that. All he could do though, it smile softly and wave back, walking towards the next window he had to line with salt.

x X x

Dwight was just trying to waste some time, and he had to read that book for english class. He needed a change of scene. His room contained too many memories, so he sat in the school library, reading. It was relaxing. It helped take his mind off things, right up until the point that Ethan and Evan walked into the room. Dwight slid down further in his chair in an attempt to hide but it was in vain. If anything, it made them see him more. Ethan looked at Evan for a moment, nodding and then walked towards Dwight.

Dwight panicked. He decided that maybe if he acted like he hadn't noticed Ethan, maybe if he just kept reading, he would think he was disturbing him and not bother. Again, that was in vain. He was a Tweedle. Tweedles never minded disturbing people. As Ethan cleared his throat, Dwight looked up, not expecting him so close so soon.

"O-Oh. Hi." Dwight smiled softly.

"Hey." Ethan smiled, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, "I didn't upset you before, did I?"

"What?" Dwight frowned, "What are you talking about?"

"Asking you to tell me about the crash, I didn't upset you, right?"

"Oh, no. No, I've been through it all before, you know?" Dwight chuckled nervously. Ethan was so close. He wanted to kiss him. So badly. Just reach out, grab his hand and pull him into his lap. He'd done it so many times before, why couldn't he do it now?

"Oh. Right." Ethan laughed softly.

Ethan just kept looking at him. Dwight wasn't sure what to think, "What's wrong?"

"You're wearing my hoodie." Ethan murmured, tilting his head to the side as he took in the sight of Dwight in his hoodie.

Dwight blushed, looking down at himself. He didn't even realise he had it on, "I'm so sorry. Do you want it back? I'm so used to wearing your clothes and it was in my room…"

"No." Ethan shook his head quickly, brushing his hand over Dwight's arm impulsively, "It suits you…I'll see you around, okay?"

Dwight could barely trust his voice as he watched Ethan walk back to his brother, "O-Okay…"


	8. Chapter 8

_Chapter 8_

Ethan felt weird. He was standing in his dorm room with Evan, looking down at the clothes drawer. There was a red plaid pyjama shirt there, one he remembered distinctly belonging to Dwight. He supposed that if he was with Dwight, and if his clothes were in his room, chances are, some of Dwight's may have come his way too.

He brushed his hand over the fabric, smiling softly. Impulsively, he picked it out and slipped it on. It felt right to be wearing that. He took a deep breath, sighing happily. It had a familiar smell but he didn't know how it was familiar. He supposed that would be what Dwight smelt like. It was nice and the shirt was so warm.

Ethan rushed into the bed, trying to keep it that way and sighed happily. It felt wrong though. This still wasn't right. He wasn't sure what it was, but this wasn't the way it was supposed to be. The bed felt wrong for some reason. It was cold. It didn't give him the warmth he had been expecting.

Evan crawled into the bed with him as they always had for as long as Ethan could remember and it was still wrong. He sat there, frowning and staring down at the quilt, trying to figure out what it was. It didn't feel so safe here. Sure, his big brother was there but something made it feel a lot less safe.

"What's wrong?" Evan murmured softly, looking at his brother worriedly. He had a feeling this would happen though. It was a good thing, really. It meant that he was going to be able to learn things, or at least get a sense of things.

"Something isn't right." Ethan murmured, looking around the room, trying to figure it out. He nearly said that there was no salt along the doorway or the windowsill but quickly stopped himself. Why would there be? That wasn't right. He kept trying to figure it out, and then he realised, "I don't usually sleep here."

Evan nodded slowly, "No. You don't."

Ethan took a shaky breath, looking over at Evan and smiled sadly, "I normally sleep with Dwight, don't I?"

Evan nodded, slowly, smiling reassuringly, "Yeah. You have for a while now."

"But what about you?"

Evan took a deep breath, thinking it through for a moment. Sure it hurt at first but it was what Ethan wanted. Ethan helped him gradually get used to him not being around and he just wanted his brother to be happy. Besides, Ethan would visit all the time. He spent every moment away from Dwight, with him. If Evan ever called, Ethan always came running. He knew his brother loved him, despite the distance the relationship had given them. That was bound to happen. He couldn't spend every moment with his brother and his boyfriend. That just wouldn't work.

"I'm fine. You helped me get used to it. You're happy with him, so I'm happy that you're with him."

"But I don't want to just leave you behind." Ethan bit his lip, looking away sadly.

Evan immediately pulled Ethan closer, wrapping an arm around him, "Hey, I'm fine. You don't leave me behind, okay? You look after me. You've done absolutely everything you can to help me get used to the way things are now. I'm okay with it. You spend every spare moment with me."

"Really?" Ethan looked up at Evan hopefully. He was so scared that if this was all true, he was taking his brother for granted. It was like some kind of bad dream. He could picture it in his head when they told him about it but it was as though it was someone else living it, not him. It wasn't right. Like they weren't his memories and it was really unnerving. He couldn't quite get his head around what was real and what wasn't. He was trapped in his own personal Wonderland and he didn't know how to get out.

"I feel like I'm going crazy." Ethan whispered, raking a hand through his hair.

Evan hugged Ethan as tightly as he could, kissing the top of his head, "He loves you. I know it sounds crazy and messed up but the White Knight fell for Tweedledee, and you know what? Tweedledee fell just as hard. You keep each other safe, and happy, and I am so proud of you for choosing someone like him. He's done nothing but give you hope. He makes you happier than I've ever seen you before."

Ethan rested his head on Evan's chest, a smile tugging at his lips, "You say all these wonderful things about us, like we were the most perfect thing in the world. It sounds amazing. I'd love for it to be true but it's just too good to be. How could he do all that for me? How can any of that be real?"

"Because it is." Evan groaned in frutration, "I know it sounds absolutely insane. I get that but you have to believe me. I'm your brother and I'm telling you that he loves you and you love him. You don't remember it now but you will. It'll get better, I promise."

Ethan looked up at Evan and sighed, "Well then, what am I supposed to do?"

Evan bit his lip, looking at the bed as he thought. He couldn't just tell Ethan to go along with everything. If Ethan didn't want it, he wasn't going to force him into it, but if he said no that would be it. It would crush Dwight is Ethan suddenly turned around and told him that he wasn't going to be with him again. Ethan couldn't remember it and as long as he couldn't remember it, he wouldn't know what he was giving up. He couldn't just let Ethan give up without trying.

"You…just live your life. Get through each day, and figure out how you're feeling." Evan finally answered.

"If this isn't true and I say yes, then I am in for a life of misery. If this is true and I say no, then I will be missing out on the best thing that's ever happened to me." Ethan frowned, rubbing his head tiredly, "I'm so confused."

"I can't tell you what to do. Just give Dwight a chance, okay?"

"Of course. He's still my friend. I still want to see him. We've always been friends."

"Dude, he used to hate us." Evan murmured, chuckling softly, "But watch out for him, okay. He might be alright now but I honestly don't know how much longer this is going to last."

"What do you mean?" Ethan frowned, tilting his head in confusion, "Dwight's my friend. We're going to be fine."

"He wants more than that though, doesn't he? He's trying to keep a distance to make iteasier for you but sooner or later that's going to be too much for him to take anymore. He's going to want to get close, and close for him now, is what you had. Don't let him force it on you, but don't turn him down too harshly either, okay?"

"I'm going to be as understanding as I can for him. I know it's hard for him too, but that doesn't mean I have to go along with everything he says and I'm not going to let him get away with everything either. I'll do my best. That's all I can do." Ethan smiled as reassuringly as he could.

"And I'm going to be here to help you through as much as I can."

Ethan grinned, resting his head in the crook of Evan's neck, "And that is another reason why you're the best brother ever."

"Just want to look out for you."

"And you always do."

"Get some sleep, okay?"

"Yeah okay."

There was a short pause before Evan spoke once more, "It's good to have you back Ethan."

"It's good to be back."

x X x

Dwight didn't like it. He hated it. It felt so wrong. He was sitting in the middle of his bed, all alone with the small reminders of Ethan scattered around his room. There was a nerf gun lying on Dwight's desk, and his clothes were still in various places around the room. Even his smell still lingered. Dwight wasn't sure how he was supposed to sleep without Ethan there, keeping him warm and safe.

At that moment, a knock sounded at the door and Dwight wanted it to be Ethan. He wanted it so badly. He would've done anything to see that door open and have Ethan standing there, smiling softly. To have him walking into the room and curling up in his arms.

Dwight was a little saddened when he heard Reed's voice sound through the door, "Dwight? Can I come in?"

He smiled softly, grabbing a pillow and hugging it to his chest. Reed was good at helping Dwight forget about the bad stuff, but he wasn't so sure he would be able to do that this time. Still, it would be good to be able to spend some time with him.

"It's open, Reed!" Dwight called, resting his chin on the top of the pillow. He kept his eyes on the door just in case Reed tripped on something on the way in…or tripped on nothing at all. That had happened more than a few times.

Reed smiled brightly as he opened the door, carefully stepping over the salt line Dwight had there at all times. His hands were full of different things and Dwight bit his lip, watching him nervously. He was sure he was going to drop at least one of them, if not all of them. He didn't though. It was amazing. Reed couldn't even see where he was walking with all the things in his arms, yet he managed to get all the way to Dwight's bed and place them down beside him before sitting next to him. Dwight stared at him in awe.

"What?" Reed frowned, "I have my graceful moments."

Dwight chuckled softly, rubbing the back of his neck, "Yeah…yeah, I guess you do. What are you doing here Reed?"

"I told you I was going to come and see you, and here I am. Unless you want me to leave." Reed murmured a little sadly.

"No! No, I didn't mean it like that at all." Dwight grabbed Reed's wrist before he could get back up, "Stay. Please. I miss talking to you."

Reed smiled softly, opening the big box he had brought, "I got cake like I said I would, and there's juice." He held up the bottle, "I figured I'd make sure you weren't lonely. You and Ethan are always in here together. It seemed wrong for you to be all alone."

"What about Shane?"

Reed blushed, smiling fondly, "He can go one night without me."

Shane was the Ethan to Reed's Dwight. He loved him to death, everyone could see it, even if Reed wasn't about to announce that to the world any time soon. He didn't think it was something everyone needed to know about. It was just Shane and Reed, nothing more. Dwight was one of the few people that Reed would openly talk about the other boy to.

"You don't have to-"

Reed quickly cut him off, holding out a piece of cake for Dwight, "Let me look after my best friend. Please?"

Dwight just looked at Reed for a moment, a smile tugging at his lips. Reed was really his only friend. He didn't mind so much. At least he had someone. Reed was very good at being a friend too. He knew exactly when Dwight needed him and what he'd need to do to make Dwight feel better.

When Dwight finally spoke, his voice came out soft, "Thank you."

Reed grinned brightly as Dwight took the piece of cake from him, "Anytime, and I mean that."

Dwight picked at the piece of cake, taking a small bite, "So, pray tell, how does Reed Van Kamp plan to cheer me up?"

Reed shuffled over to Dwight's side, smiling up at him and handed him the bottle of the juice, "Drink."

Dwight nodded, chuckling softly, "Yes, sir." He quickly took a sip of the drink, watching Reed to make sure he was happy with the amount that he had.

"How are you doing?"

"I'm fine. I'm, I'm great Reed." Dwight smiled reassuringly at him, sighing softly as he realised that there was absolutely no way Reed was going to believe him. He chuckled nervously, "What do you want me to say?"

"I want you to be honest, so that I can help."

Dwight looked down at the bed, biting his lip, "I'm…I'm a wreck. I went through so much. I went through all that and the only thing that was keeping me going was that I was going to get him back and I was going to be able to look after him, a-and now…now he doesn't even know who I am." There were tears stinging at Dwight's eyes but he refused to let them fall.

Reed smiled sadly, resting his head on Dwight's shoulder, "He makes you feel better about everything, doesn't he?"

"Of course he does."

"I'm going to give you something. Something that means a lot to me." Reed picked up a little toy rabbit from the pile of things he'd brought, "This is Babbit. Technically his name is Rabbit but when I was a kid I couldn't say that so I called him Babbit. I used to have nightmares, and I needed Babbit to keep them away because my mom wasn't around that much, working, you know?" He shrugged, smiling down at the little rabbit in his hands, "Anyway, Babbit kept me safe at night, I've always kept him just in case, but I think you need him more than I do."

Dwight watched as Reed held out the rabbit before him. It looked worn out. Like it was so, so old, but it wasn't. Not really. It was just loved. Reed had poured his love into that little toy rabbit when he was a kid and now he was going to give it to Dwight, all just to make him feel better.

Dwight bit his lip, putting down the juice bottle and brushing a finger over the toy, "I-I can't accept this Reed. This is your childhood. It means so much to you."

"And so do you, and I want you to have him."

"A-Are you sure?"

"Positive. Just look after him." Reed smiled softly.

"I promise." Dwight looked down at the little rabbit, leaning into Reed just a little bit, "Thank you so much."

"It's nothing." Reed looked up at Dwight and murmured softly, a worried look on his face, "Just promise me you're not going to give up."

"What do you mean?" Dwight furrowed his brows in confusion.

"I mean, Ethan doesn't remember who you are. Don't let him give up on you, and do not give up on him. Please."

"He remembers who I am."

Reed rolled his eyes, "But not what you are to him. Just promise me you're not going to give up on this."

"Why id this so important to you?"

Reed paused for a moment, "Because…how can I have any hope for Shane and I if you and Ethan are destroyed because of this? I always thought…I thought if Shane and I could be like you and Ethan, we'd be okay through everything, so I need you to be okay through this. Not just for you, but for me too."

Dwight sighed softly, "You and Shane are perfect. Trust me. Nothing can get between you two."

"Nothing could get between you and Ethan, and then this did. Just promise me you won't give up. Please."

Dwight pulled Reed into a hug, resting his chin on Reed's shoulder, "I promise. I'd never ever give up on him. We'll be fine. You'll see."

Reed sighed in relief, pulling away to look up at Dwight, "I'm staying in your spare bed tonight."

"Are you sure?" Reed looked over at the bed next to his. He had a room mate for a while but it didn't last. Ethan was the closest thing he had to that now, until Dalton assigned someone else. A guy named Todd had his eye on it though.

"Positive. You need some company tonight and I'm not about to leave you all alone."

Dwight brushed his fingers over the little toy rabbit, tilting his head to the side and smiling softly. He was so grateful for Reed. Reed was always the one that was there for him. Through absolutely everything, Reed was the one who saw when Dwight needed someone, and knew exactly what he needed from that someone. Reed never pushed him to talk. Reed just wanted to make sure Dwight was happy, and it was the most anyone had done for him. He and Ethan were the only people Dwight had in his life, and he would always cherish that.


	9. Chapter 9

_Chapter 9_

The first night without Ethan was hard. The second was worse. The third was torture. As the days went on, it only got worse. He needed more than to just see Ethan. He needed to touch him. He needed Ethan to touch him. He needed Ethan to whisper in his ear and kiss his neck and make him special. Ethan was the only one who could make him feel like he wasn't so alone anymore.

There was so much tension building up in him and he was having trouble taking it anymore. He was trying to be really sensitive about things but when Ethan leant over, or stretched, his shirt would ride up and show Dwight that perfect sliver of skin. He was used to being able to touch that. He was used to pulling him into his arms and kissing him until Ethan dragged him off into his room and gave him so much more.

He wanted more. He needed it, craved it. It was crazy to want that at that point. He wanted to taste Ethan. He wanted to kiss him, and hold him, yes, but he wanted to run his fingers over his skin, and to make him feel alive. Dwight wanted to return the favour. So one day when Ethan was coming back from the showers, still dripping wet, Dwight snapped. The need became too much. He couldn't force himself on Ethan though. He wouldn't do that to him.

So he locked his door and he laid out in his bed, trying to pretend Ethan was there. It was never the same, and he hadn't done this in such a long time. He'd never needed to. Ethan was always there. Dwight was used to Ethan's body feeling, his fingers feeling their way over him and gentle kisses.

So that's what he imagined. He closed his eyes and it was like Ethan was there. He could almost feel it. Ethan towering over him with that smug little smile of his. Dwight smiled faintly, imagining Ethan's breath ghosting over his cheek. He kept his eyes closed, just imagining Ethan there, brushing kisses along his jaw.

Dwight sighed softly as it reached his neck, tilting his head slightly and biting his lip. He wanted it to be real. He wanted Ethan there with him. He wanted to make Ethan feel as special as Ethan always made him feel. He needed it. He stretched out slightly, sighing again as he imagined Ethan's lips finding the perfect spot, the spot they always found and grazing his teeth there. It felt so good when Ethan did that and he always managed to do it.

He wasn't even focusing on a particular image anymore, he wasn't sure where he was going with it. He just knew he had to keep going. It felt so good and he'd missed it. Sure, it wasn't the same, but it was the closest thing Dwight was going to get, at least for now.

He pretended his hands were Ethan's as they moved along his sides, slowly creeping under his shirt. It made him shiver, biting down just a little harder on his lip. Ethan took everything slow with Dwight. He wasn't sure why. He guessed it was the Tweedle's way of teasing him. He made every moment last as long as possible. That was most of the time, anyway.

Sometimes Dwight would catch him off guard. Sometimes Dwight would grab Ethan and press him to the wall. Sometimes he'd kiss Ethan hard, and rough and let his hands roam over his body, his own smirk appearing on his lips. Times like those were different. Times like those, Ethan would grab Dwight and it was all urgency. He'd all but rip Dwight's clothes off him, wanting to feel and explore and torture Dwight for what he did. Those were the times when Ethan didn't care so much about teasing.

Dwight liked it either way, but he was so used to the slow torture of Ethan's fingers, that was what he really wanted above everything else. He didn't care if made him ache with need, waiting, slowly torturing himself, that's what Ethan would do, so that's what he did.

As his hands moved over his chest, he let his fingers catch as they brushed over a nipple, his breath hitching. It was all foreplay. That's was another thing he loved about Ethan; how long he could make foreplay last. It was all a game for Ethan, to see how long Dwight could last before he started begging. It didn't take long usually, which just made Ethan want to go on for a little longer.

Dwight rubbed the pad of his thumb over his nipple, groaning softly, his back arching into the touch without even thinking. He did everything he could to make it feel like Ethan's fingers, trying to match the technique the Tweedle usually used. He slowly pushed his shirt further up, slipping it off and arched his back further into the touch, letting his nails dig into his skin just a little as he ran his fingers down his sides.

Ethan did that all the time. He'd roll his hips down into Dwight's at the same time and just thinking about it was enough to cause Dwight to moan, his own hips rolling forward, craving friction. Ethan was always so good at all this. Dwight needed Ethan to teach him. He was new to everything and Ethan had always been patient, but by this point, Dwight just wanted every touch, he knew what to expect.

His fingers traced just about the waistband of his pants, a soft whine spilling from his lips. He wanted more. He wanted to give in and just let go but he wouldn't. That's not the way Ethan would've done it. Ethan was all about subtly driving him crazy and that's exactly what Dwight was going to do. He let his fingers brush over his thighs, groaning as his hips impulsively rocked forward once more.

This was always the point where he'd start to beg. He'd mewl softly, scratching his fingers down Ethan's back and beg for him to hurry up, beg for him to touch him. Ethan would always say he already was and Dwight would want to wipe that smug grin right off his face but he was already far too preoccupied with the fingers moving back up his thighs, palming him through the fabric of his pants. He applied just the right amount of pressure, throwing his head back and groaning softly.

He wasn't sure where he was going with it anymore. He just needed to keep touching and feeling and moaning at the thought of Ethan's hands on him. He needed to keep that image in his mind because the thought of Ethan never doing this to him again was too much to bear.

Slowly, Dwight let his fingertips brush under the waistband of his pants, scratching his thumbs over his hipbones and groaned once more. Ethan usually bit those. He'd bite down hard, sucking on his skin until they bruised and then he'd growl softly into Dwight's skin, murmuring, "Mine."

Dwight moaned just thinking about it, arching his back once more, "Mmm…"

He rubbed his thumbs gently over his hips before slowly slipping down his pants. This seemed to be Ethan's favourite bit. There was always this pause where Ethan would take it all in, every time. It was like the first time all over again and Ethan always needed to take a moment to look Dwight up and down. The first few times it unnerved Dwight. Now it just seemed to turn him on a little more as the anticipation would bubble up inside of him.

Dwight paused, running his fingers over his thighs again. He bit his lip as he dug his nails harshly into his skin, groaning under his breath. Ethan would do that every time. He was better at it though. He dug them in furter, almost enough to make Dwight cringe but not quite. Just enough to leave marks. It was like he always knew exactly how much pressure and exactly Dwight liked and exactly where to touch him.

Dwight waited a moment more. He wanted to make the moment last. He wanted to make sure he was doing it just like Ethan would before he finally brushed one finger along his length from the base to the tip, his breath catching in his throat as he did. That felt amazing every time Ethan did that. Again, he couldn't help but wish it really was him, brushing his thumb over the tip.

Brushing his fingers over himself, he slowly stroked, gasping and letting the moans escape his lips. He kept imagining slightly larger hands on him, stroking him, taking it slow and making it last. He bit his lip harder, unable to stop himself from thrusting into his hand, groaning, "Mmm Ethan…"

Dwight flicked his wrist just enough as he stroked himself, gasping and throwing his head back, moaning louder this time as he pictured Ethan towering over him, biting his neck, whispering into his ear, driving him insane. It was all about Ethan in moments like those. Ethan may have been the one pleasuring him, but Ethan was all Dwight could think about. Everything else fell to incoherency, everything but the Tweedle pushing him further and further towards the edge.

Dwight's strokes became firmer, pumping faster and thrusting into his hand again, and again. It felt good, to release the tension but it wasn't the same. He wanted Ethan and this just wasn't him. He needed to feel the blonde's breath along his neck and his lips against his skin. He needed to scratch his nails down Ethan's back and to kiss him roughly as he moved his hips into his hand. Instead he had this, at least until he figured out how to make Ethan see he needed him.

Dwight could feel te familiar warmth coil in his stomach but he wanted it to last a little longer. He wanted to keep thinking about Ethan stroking him, Ethan's smug grin, and the way he'd kiss him soft and slowly when they finished. He wanted that so badly but he knew he couldn't have it and as one final stroke sent him over the edge, crying out Ethan's name, Dwight felt kind of numb.

He melted into the sheets, reaching for a tissue to clean himself and again, taking it slow, just as Ethan would. It hurt a little though, laying there like that. Usually Ethan would be there and he'd crawl into his arms. He'd whisper, 'I love you' into his lips and that's where they'd stay, usually just looking into each other's eyes. Dwight grabbed Ethan's pillow and hugged it tightly, keeping his eyes closed. He did all he could to imagine it was Ethan. He knew it wasn't. It wasn't the same but it felt nice for a little while. He felt a little less alone.

He buried his face in the pillow, pretending it was Ethan's shoulder and took a deep breath, sighing happily as he took in Ethan's scent, "Mmm…"

He hugged the pillow a little tighter, keeping his eyes closed and nuzzling the pillow impuulsively. He always did that with Ethan, it felt right to do it then. He wanted it to feel real, so he did everything he could to make it feel real. Still, as he closed his eyes, imagining as much as he could, he could almost feel Ethan's arms wrapped firmly around him. It was nice. It made him feel safe and in that moment, he found himself slowly drifting to sleep.

x X x

Dwight knew he was dreaming, but it was a nice dream. As he wrapped his arms further around the boy in front of him, he sighed happily, kissing his shoulder, "I love you."

The Tweedle holding him close grinned, kissing Dwight's head and running his hand along his back, "I love you too, Dwight. I always will."

Dwight bit his lip, looking up at him sadly, "But you don't anymore. You said you didn't."

Ethan ran a hand into Dwight's hair, soothing him and Dwight sighed happily, leaning into the touch. Ethan kissed Dwight's neck softly, "I know I don't think I do, but I do. Give me some time, okay? Sooner rather than later, we'll be like this again."

Ethan grinned, brushing their noses together and Dwight felt butterflies fill his stomach, closing the gap between them and kissing him softly. It felt so nice, so familiar and he couldn't stop himself wrapping an arm around Ethan's neck and deepening the kiss, wanting it to last as long as possible.

Dwight knew it was a dream but he was so desperate for that shred of affection from Ethan, he needed it to last. It was just one night, but it was the tiny boost he needed, even if in the morning, he'd wake up all alone.


	10. Chapter 10

_Chapter 10_

The day had started so well. Dwight had woken up smiling for the first time since the accident. The dream had kept him feeling warm and safe throughout the night, clinging tighter to the pillow. He would whisper into the pillow occasionally, pretending it was Ethan. It was easier when he kept his eyes closed and pretended.

He whispered so many things into that pillow. He spoke of their past, of the things they did and the ways Ethan had made him feel. He murmured about the future, and all the things he planned for them. Mostly, he whispered of how much he loved Ethan, how much he always would.

He knew that moment wouldn't last but that didn't make it hurt any less when he finally opened his eyes. That didn't mean he didn't bit his lip and stifle tears when he woke up alone. It hurt. It hurt so much but he knew this was how it had to be now.

He was going to try to fix it though. That was the main plan. He couldn't just try to avoid Ethan anymore. He had to actually try to talk to him, and get him to see things the way he did. Dwight just wanted to show Ethan that he really did love him with all his heart, and he wanted some sort of reassurance that just maybe Ethan might remember some of that, might remember that he loved Dwight too.

Dwight almost didn't want to get out of that bed though. It was safe there. It was warm. It would never be as warm as when he had Ethan there, but it was still warm, still safe, still the only place he felt like he'd be okay. When he closed his eyes, it felt like Ethan was there. His smell still lingered around the room, and on his pillow. He wasn't exactly sure how that had become Ethan's pillow. It just was, and Dwight wouldn't have it any other way.

Slowly, Dwight opened his eyes, groaning softly as the sun shone into them and quickly shut them again, rubbing at them tiredly. He figured the least the sun could do was cut him some slack with the day he had planned out. He still wasn't sure exactly what he was going to say to Ethan, he just knew that this couldn't go on much longer. Dwight was going to go crazy if it did.

He ran his hands through his hair, still reluctant to move from the bed. The bed was safe. He knew he'd be safe if he stayed there. Leaving meant finding Ethan, and telling Ethan about all the things he wanted him to remember. As exciting as that was, there was the terror building up in the pit of his stomach. What if Ethan didn't want that anymore? What if Ethan didn't want him?

He had to push those thoughts to the side though. He wanted his Ethan back and leaving things the way they were just wasn't going to do that. He had to take action to get Ethan to see how much he loved him. How though? What was he supposed to say to make Ethan see? Sighing sadly, Dwight sat up, rubbing his face as he mentally prepared himself for the day ahead of him.

x X x

The first problem Dwight faced was finding the Tweedle. Normally, Ethan would come to him. Normally, they'd be together because they'd either spent the night together, or Ethan would know where to find him. He never really knew where to look for Ethan. He used to hide from him so often because of the pranks Ethan would pull on him, and now he'd been hiding to give him some space, so he didn't know.

He had resorted to aimlessly walking along the hallways. He couldn't be too far. Although, maybe he had a lesson Dwight didn't know about. It was possible with the amount of lessons they skipped to be together that Ethan may have had a lesson at that time that Dwight didn't know about.

It was quiet in the Windsor halls. Dwight should've noticed that. The one thing everyone knew about Windsor was that it was never quiet. The twins were always causing chaos, there were explosions almost daily, there was usually yelling, all sorts. Dwight usually hid away from it, but he knew it was there. You couldn't miss it. So why was it quiet now? The quiet usually meant trouble.

A few more moments of the eerie silence passed before Dwight heard it. That ever so familiar sound of running footsteps and battlecries. He knew it all to well. He'd been caught in the lines of fire enough times to know. He even knew how to avoid it now, how to dodge most of the bullets as Ethan and Evan fired at each other. This hit him harder than he expected though.

I was thinking it was about time you and I had a date with some nerf guns. Ethan's words from back in that café, before all this madness started were ringing through Dwight's head. The way he said it, so flirty. Dwight was sure Ethan planned more. He'd probably planned to pounce on him again, to press their lips together and dip his fingers under Dwight's shirt, running along his chest until he admitted defeat. Dwight would never admit defeat, though. Ethan always tasted amazing, his fingers always knew exactly where to touch. There was no way he'd ever admit defeat when Ethan got like that. He'd do anything for that little bit more, craving every touch.

He couldn't get himself to move from his spot, the thoughts of all the things he and Ethan could've done after breakfast that morning. There were so many possibilities it almost hurt to think about it. It could've been perfect. They were so happy. They could've still been so happy together.

As the twins rushed down the hall, armed with nerf guns and screaming as they fired at each other, Dwight couldn't bring himself to move. He just let the bullets hit him and stayed frozen for a moment, until finally Evan stopped, walking over to him and brushing a hand over his shoulder.

He tilted his head to the side, frowning, "Dwight, are you okay?"

It took Dwight another moment to snap out of it, shaking his head, "Y-Yeah. Yeah, I was just thinking. Sorry." He turned to Ethan, seeing the odd look in his eyes. Ethan looked so worried about him. He never saw Ethan look at him like that before they were together. Dwight let just a little hope creep into him as he spoke softly, "Can I talk to Ethan for a minute…alone?"

"Right." Evan squeezed Dwight's shoulder, smiling reassuringly at Ethan, "I'll be in our room waiting for Ethan when you guys are done."

Dwight watched Evan leave for just a moment, looking over at Ethan. Ethan watched Evan intently. It was like Ethan didn't want Evan to leave him with Dwight all alone and the thought of that kind of stung. What was he going to do to him? Did he really think Dwight was going to do something wrong? He didn't want to hurt Ethan at all, he wanted to show him the way he saw things, so that maybe Ethan would remember and see things the way he did before.

Ethan looked over at him, their eyes catching and Dwight almost wanted to look away. He didn't know why. It seemed like that was what Ethan wanted, but he needed to look into those soft blue eyes again. He missed them. Ethan started slowly walking towards him and it was as though as the distance grew smaller, so too did the pain. Things were feeling more right in that moment.

"You wanted to talk to me?" Ethan smiled faintly, his voice soft and unsure.

Dwight held up a small rose, white with red tips and smiled fondly, "Y-You always said roses were your favourite…"

Ethan looked at the rose for a moment, unsure of whether or not to take it. As that small moment stretched on, Dwight felt more and more uneasy. Ethan blushed, taking the rose and Dwight sighed in relief, "You didn't have to do that."

"Yes I did." Dwight looked down at the floor, shuffling nervously, "I promised I'd give you at least one rose a week. I guess you can't remember, but I have to keep my promises."

Ethan looked at the rose carefully, smiling softly, "Thank you."

Dwight grinned, feeling a little better about everything. He didn't think Ethan would accept the rose, so already things were going better than he had expected them to. He was still trying to gather his thoughts together in his head. He knew he had to show Ethan that he loved him, he just wasn't sure how exactly he was going to go about it. "C-Come with me. We can sit down and talk."

Ethan nodded slowly, biting his lip as Dwight went ohold out his hand. He was used to holding Ethan's hand and he almost forgot. He quickly pulled his hand back, crossing his arms over his chest to stop himself doing anything more. He opened the door to the common room, sighing in relief as he found the room completely empty. Perfect. He needed some space with Ethan to talk about things.

Carefully, Dwight took a seat on the couch, smiling softly as Ethan sat next to him. He looked down at the floor, trying not to think about how close Ethan was to him. He wanted to move closer though. He wanted to lean against Ethan. He was hurting so much and usually Ethan was there for him in moments like these. Usually Ethan would wrap an arm around him and pull him close, looking after him. It wasn't like that this time though and that kind of made him want to cry, want to break down and let Ethan see how much this was hurting him.

"How are you?" Dwight murmured softly, not trusting his voice. He looked up at Ethan, trying hard to stop himself crying. He hadn't expected this to be so hard. This was his once chance to try to get Ethan back and he wasn't about to blow it.

"I'm good. Just trying to remember what I can, you know?" Ethan smiled faintly, looking at Dwight with eyes filled with concern, "How are you?"

Dwight bit his lip, wringing his hands together and looking away. He chuckled sadly, "You really want to know the answer to that?"

"Yes." Ethan replied quickly, leaning closer, "I want to know because I know I'm causing you pain and I want to make it better, so tell me what I'm supposed to do."

Dwight looked into Ethan's eyes again. He always lost himself in the icy blue of those eyes. He bit his lip, tilting his head to the side in an attempt to see those beautiful flecks of green in them. He loved looking into Ethan's eyes. There was something about them, Dwight could find himself staring into them forever and never ever getting bored.

"I'm scared." Dwight whispered, leaning close and brushing his fingers hesitantly over Ethan's. Ethan smiled softly, letting Dwight brush their fingers together. Dwight kept his eyes focused on their fingers. It felt so right to hold Ethan's hand, to just be with him. He let their fingers thread together, "I don't want to lose you." He whispered softly, brushing his lips gently over Ethan's knuckles.

Ethan took a deep breath, almost tempted to take his hand away from Dwight. He wasn't sure what Dwight was expecting of them meeting up like this but he didn't want Dwight getting too used to it. He couldn't just take his hand away though. Dwight needed the comfort and he wasn't about to just stop that. That would be cruel, "Dwight…I don't know what you're losing. I don't remember. I'm sorry. If I could make this easier, I would."

"Try. Please. I-I know I'm asking a lot, but you've got to try." Dwight was desperate. The touch of Ethan's fingertips just making him want more. He didn't know what he was supposed to do. He needed Ethan to know, to remember. He needed Ethan to love him again, because no matter what the others said, Ethan simply didn't love him at that moment.

The Tweedle looked at Dwight warily, unsure of what he was supposed to say. He couldn't just turn Dwight down, but he couldn't say yes either. He was trying, but he didn't know how long it was going to take, or if he ever would get his memories back.

"Dwight…I…"

"Don't." Dwight squeezed Ethan's hand, tears welling in his eyes as he realised Ethan was thinking exactly what he was; that this might be it for the rest of their lives now, "Don't say you can't. Don't say you won't because you're everything to me and I can't lose you. All I'm asking, is that you try to remember. Please."

"I am trying." Ethan looked away sadly, "Do you think I like being like this? I have these memories in my head of this life I had with you. I see these moments of us together, kissing, hugging, laughing…being in love a-and it's like it isn't me. It's like watching someone else's life and it hurts. It's confusing."

"You remember?" Dwight shuffled closer and bushed his thumb over Ethan's cheek, causing him to flinch. Dwight bit his lip, gently rubbing Ethan's cheek, the way he did when Ethan was upset. "I know it hurts. I know you're scared, and you're confused, but that's you. That's you and it's me and we had a whole life together planned."

"Two kids." Ethan whispered, staring into Dwight's dark eyes.

"W-What?"

"Nothing."

"No." Dwight stopped his thumb's movements, just touching his cheek for the sake of contact, "What did you say?"

"Two kids. W-We said we wanted two kids." Ethan's voice was soft and there were tears filling his eyes as he spoke, "You wanted two. You said you always wanted two kids but you were scared to mention it."

Dwight smiled faintly, speaking just as softly as Ethan, "I thought I'd scare you away, but you just said they could be twins."

A tear slid down Ethan's cheek, Dwight quickly wiping it away. Ethan's eyes were so wide, so full of fear, Dwight didn't know what to do. He had no way to fix this for him. All he wanted to do was take the pain away but he knew he couldn't. He knew it was going to take time. Dwight was just so sick of waiting, though. He wanted the guy he loved back. He wanted things to be the way they were before.

"I can't trust my own mind." Ethan whispered. "Sometimes there are these moments, other times there are these thoughts and I don't know what's real and what isn't."

"It's all real." Dwight brushed hair out of Ethan's eyes, trying to smile as reassuringly as he could, "I know it might seem crazy but all of it is real."

"Well then, you should know that I doubted!" Ethan took his hand away, rubbing his eyes. He raked his hands through his hair, trying to get his muddled up thoughts to be a little bit clearer. "He…I-I doubted us. I doubted myself. I thought you were going to leave me. I thought I wasn't good enough. So if we were so perfect together, so right for each other, why would I ever doubt us?"

Dwight just stared at Ethan for a moment. He didn't really think that? Was that the way Ethan really thought? He never wanted Ethan to doubt that he loved him. He wanted Ethan to know that he was always there on his mind, everything Dwight could ever hope for, ever want. "Y-You thought I didn't love you?"

"No! No, I knew that…I think. I don't know. It's kind of fuzzy. He-I…I knew you loved me. I just didn't know when you were going to turn around and find someone better."

"And that's making you doubt if remembering me, remembering us is even worth it?" Dwight tilted his head to the side curiously.

As Ethan nodded slowly, Dwight sighed sadly. He didn't want past insecurities to mess this up. He didn't know exactly how to get Ethan passed those. It wasn't like he didn't love Ethan. He loved him more than anything but getting Ethan to see that he was never going to leave him was a challenge. Even Dwight had those doubts from time to time, thinking Ethan might run off with someone better.

"Ethan, everyone thinks like that, okay? Everyone thinks they're not worth it, they're not good enough, but to me, you are. You're everything. I'm nothing without you. Just look at the way I've been without you. I can't cope like this. I need you in my life to keep me safe, to keep me happy." Dwight smiled as reassuringly as he could, biting his lip nervously.

Ethan sighed softly, "I guess that makes sense. I just don't like the thoughts that jump into my head sometimes. I don't know where they come from. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do with them, so I just try to ignore them, to get on with my life and figure things out as I go."

Dwight leant forward, knowing it was probably a mistake in his mind but needing to do it. He just wanted to be closer. Moving closer still, he pressed a delicate kiss to Ethan's cheek. His skin was so warm. Dwight had almost forgotten how warm Ethan's skin was. He missed it so much. It wasn't fair that Ethan was right there, so close to him and he couldn't kiss him properly. He'd done it a million times before, he just wanted one more. Deep down he knew he wouldn't be able to stop at one though and as he pulled away from Ethan's cheek, he looked into his eyes, whispering softly, "I love you."

"You know I can't say that back, Dwight." Ethan bit his lip. Dwight's lips against his cheek felt so nice. His skin still tingled where they'd touched. He didn't know why this was all having such an affect on him.

"Please." Dwight murmured desperately, his voice cracking, "Just once. Just say it once, please."

"I can't. I don't remember it, and I'm not going to lie to you. I'm sorry."

"Ethan, I need you. I can't keep living like this."

"I can't give you what you want right now. I'm sorry." Ethan looked at Dwight for a moment, guilt digging at him as he saw the tears start to slip, falling down his cheeks. He couldn't help him though. Every time he tried to help Dwight, it only hurt him more. Instead, he got to his feet, crossing his arms over his chest and looked at the floor, "I should get back to Evan."

"No. Please don't go. I haven't spoken to you in so long. I'm sorry. I'll stop."

"I've made him wait long enough." Ethan smiled sadly. He didn't want to leave Dwight lke this, but he knew that anything he said to Dwight now, would only hurt him more. He was so tired of hurting him, "Thank you for the rose."

Ethan left before Dwight could even say anything. He watched Ethan go, looking at the rose one last time before he left with it. He hated that he'd done this to Ethan. He'd made him so confused, and he was making it worse. Deciding it was better if he just stayed away, Dwight put his head in his hands, finally letting the tears fall. Without Ethan, he felt hopeless.


	11. Chapter 11

_Chapter 11_

Ethan hated himself. He hated himself for what he did to Dwight. He hated himself for what he was doing to Dwight. He even hated himself for not staying in that room, but he couldn't. He knew he couldn't. He needed space from Dwight, no matter how much his heart was screaming at him to go back into that room, he knew he couldn't. He had to keep moving, to keep going with his life.

That didn't make it hurt any less to see Dwight like that. He was right. He was a complete wreck without Ethan, but he didn't know how he was supposed to help Dwight. Every time he came near Dwight, he'd find a way to make things worse. It could've been something he did, or something he said, but every time, he'd have to leave the room. It was better that way, and it hurt Dwight less.

It wasn't that he didn't care about Dwight. He did. He wanted Dwight to be happy. He was tired of hurting Dwight and the more he hurt him, the more it hurt himself. The problem was that the only way to help Dwight was to give him something that he just wasn't ready to give. At least, as far as he knew, he wasn't ready.

The memories that cropped up in his head were strange. They came at the most unexpected moments. Ethan would see so many things from his and Dwight's supposed past. He saw Dwight's blush as they kissed for the first time. The way Dwight bit his lip afterwards, almost scared he'd ruined things even though it was Ethan that initiated it, made Ethan smile softly to himself.

He remembered their first time together. Dwight was so awkward, so nervous, so cute and he made every moment feel so good. Every moment with Dwight was tender. Which wasn't to say he didn't have a rougher side. Ethan had had flashes of Dwight pinning him against the wall, biting his neck, growling into his lips. Dwight gave just as much as he got.

Ethan wanted that back. He almost craved it, but he couldn't just give that to Dwight right away. It was like he was starting over fresh. He needed time to figure out where he wanted to go and indeed, if he even wanted Dwight anymore. There was still something in him that was drawn to Dwight, he just didn't know what it was he wanted to get out of that in the long run.

The truth was, Dwight Houston was the strangest guy Ethan had ever met. That should've been the first real indicator for him. In general, he and Evan were always the crazy ones but when Dwight was around, it seemed someone else was even crazier than they were. Dwight was always the weird one, making his salt lines, and filling up spray bottles with holy water. He collected the strangest things and refused to believe they were anything less than imperitive to own, to keep people safe. Everything about him drew Ethan in, and sometimes, Ethan liked that too.

The thought of he and Dwight actually being together was a near impossible one, though. Dwight was never affectionate. He would stiffen when anyone hugged him. He wouldn't like to be touched, at all. Dwight had been that way for as long as Ethan had known him, so that was all he really knew of the knight. Yet here he was with these memories of he and Dwight kissing, hugging, holding hands. Dwight had kissed his cheek in the room when they were talking. Ethan didn't flinch because he didn't want Dwight to, he just didn't think Dwight would want to.

Dwight seemed to want everything with Ethan. He wanted kisses, he wanted touches, he wanted to tell him he loved him, and that was the one thing that hurt above all others. He couldn't tell Dwight he loved him, no matter how much Dwight wanted to hear it. He couldn't lie, but the truth was, there was a part of him that did love Dwight. There was a part that wanted to reach out for Dwight's hand, and to lean into him as he kissed his cheek. Somewhere, deep down inside Ethan, he craved Dwight's attention and he craved Dwight's touch.

Why would he want that though? Why with Dwight? Of all the people in the world, why him? It was like he woke up one day and they'd planted these thoughts in his head, these thoughts that weren't his. Yet, when he remembered flashes if their past, he saw himself with Dwight, no matter how much it felt like it wasn't him at all, he could see that it was. It didn't make sense. It was like every memory wasn't one at all, it was just a dream.

Ethan was almost bitter about it. Why was he forced to have these thoughts about someone he didn't even know, not really? He didn't want them. He wanted to give them to someone else. The thoughts and memories were pointless when he couldn't really feel it. It was as though this was all being forced on him and he didn't want that. He wanted to decide for himself, like Evan said, just keep living and figure it out as he went. He felt like these so called 'memories' were forcing it on him. He wanted it to be real, not forced.

He figured that if he really wanted it, it would come to him slowly, but the way the thoughts would bombard him at the most unexpected moments were doing nothing to help him, merely confuse him. He wasn't sure what the memories were trying to do. It was like Dwight was there in his head and every time he started to doubt, started to think maybe he and Dwight weren't meant to be, the flashes would jump into his mind and tell him that he was with Dwight and always will be. A life sentence he wasn't sure he wanted.

Dwight was cute though. He was adorable. The way his black hair fell into his eyes, especially when he was reading always got to Ethan. It always made him smile. Dwight would get frustrated with it. He'd frown and even go so far as to grumble on occasion and Ethan couldn't stop himself grinning at that. Then he'd blow it out of his eyes and somehow he even made that really cute.

Those eyes. Those beautiful dark eyes. Ethan had never really considered dark eyes to be all that pretty, but when he looked into Dwight's he saw so much. He saw the depth, he saw the pain and the suffering. He couldn't even begin to understand all the pain Dwight had been through but when he looked into those eyes, he wanted to make it go away. He wanted to take away Dwight's pain and leave that little spark behind. He looked even better when that spark in his eyes that meant he was happy. He always wanted Dwight to be happy.

Above everything else, The thing about Dwight that really got to Ethan was his intense need to protect. With everything that happened to Dwight in the past, with his brother especially, Dwight was so focused on keeping everyone close to him safe, even those who weren't so close. The salt lines around all of Windsor were his way of keeping the monsters away, making sure everyone would be okay. He had so much holy water and he always kept a bottle on him, just in case. Ethan had even found a bag of salt in his room. He supposed Dwight had given him that to keep him safe. There were so many herbs, wooden stakes, amulets and all sorts of other things Ethan couldn't quite identify in Dwight's room, all designed to protect them all.

There were so many good things about Dwight, really. Ethan wouldn't doubt that, not ever, but that didn't mean he would just fall in love with him in a snap. There had to be something that really made him fall but Ethan couldn't find that. He wanted it all to be so much easier. All his thoughts were conflicted, because really, he'd do anything for Dwight. He was probably the best friend Ethan had ever had, but that didn't mean he was going to love him. That didn't mean he wasn't angry that everyone seemed to know about his life, but Ethan himself, didn't.

It was annoying, and frustrating and there were times when he just wanted to scream, but he couldn't. Evan was always around. Not that he wanted Evan to leave, he needed Evan around to keep him grounded. He certainly couldn't scream at Dwight. He wouldn't let himself take out his anger on Dwight. He was going through just as much pain as he was and that wouldn't be fair, Ethan knew that. Didn't mean he didn't want to scream any less though. He was angry and hurt and as far as Ethan was concerned, he had every right to cry, and break things, and scream until his throat hurt.

So after he had seen Dwight, he did the only thing he could think to do. He stayed away. He didn't want to lash out at Dwight. He knew that Dwight was just trying to help, and that Dwight just wanted things back to the way they were. If he knew what it was he was missing, not just the few visuals he'd gotten, but the feelings too, maybe it would be easier, but as it was, he just felt like lashing out and Dwight was the last person he wanted to lash out at.

So the last thing he was expecting when he went into the library with all intent to study to find Dwight there. Dwight didn't see him though. It was the first time since Ethan had woken up that Dwight hadn't noticed him after walking into a room. It was almost scary, not to have Dwight's attention. He knew something was wrong right away, even if he didn't know what. Dwight wouldn't be slouching like that if there wasn't something wrong. Ethan almost didn't want to know what it was, but he wanted to help. He knew that going over there would make things worse, but maybe if he knew what was wrong, he could make it better, somehow.

He grabbed Evan's arm, causing his twin to frown, tilting his head in confusion, "What's wrong?"

"This way." Ethan dragged Evan to the book shelves closest to Dwight, "There were some good books around here I was looking at last time we came."

"Oh, really?" Evan grinned, looking intently at the books on he shelf.

Ethan looked over the books at Dwight. He was sitting with Reed, and they both looked anything but happy. Dwight looked miserable. He had a little rose sitting on the desk in front of him and Ethan bit his lip, realising what that rose would've been for. It hurt just to look at it. The rose was different to the last one he'd given Ethan. It was pure red, so bright, so vibrant and Ethan almost wanted to reach out and touch it.

"Will you please just tell me what's going on?" Reed murmured softly, Ethan almost didn't hear it.

Reed was leaning into Dwight, sharing his warmth and Ethan could almost remember doing that with Dwight. He was sure he used to do that when Dwight was like that. He was almost certain that was the way he would look after him and it was odd to see someone else doing it.

"Ethan. What else?" Dwight sighed sadly, sliding further down in his seat. Ethan was sure Dwight could've propped his feet up on the table on that angle, and he was very sure Dwight had done that before. He could vaguely remember that too.

"What's wrong now?" Reed wrapped an arm around Dwight's shoulders, pulling him into a loose hug.

"He doesn't want me anymore."

"You don't know that."

"Yes I do."

"How?" Reed furrowed his brow in confusion.

"I spoke to him the other day a-and he just…he doesn't want me. I can tell."

Reed sighed sadly, pulling Dwight into his arms properly. As Dwight's shoulders started to shake, Ethan couldn't take it anymore, looking down at the floor. He didn't mean to make Dwight feel like that. It was never meant to be like this. He was meant to be Dwight's friend. He was meant to stop Dwight from feeling like this, not cause it.

"Dude, they have Alice in Wonderland." Evan said excitedly, frowning when he saw the sad look on Ethan's face, "Hey, what's wrong?"

Ethan wasn't paying attention, caught up in his thoughts, because despite the guilt, he was angry. He was frustrated. Dwight was making him feel guilty. He had no idea what he was supposed to do and Dwight was making him feel guilty. It wasn't fair. He had to find a way to explain to Dwight, to make him see.

Looking up at Evan, Ethan smiled softly, "I need a favour from the Warblers."


	12. Chapter 12

_Chapter 12_

Dwight was stuck in the common room during his free period, studying. He thought it was for the best if he just kept studying. Focusing on his work was good. It meant he could block out everything else. It was in Dwight's best interest to just keep studying and stop thinking about Ethan and his beautiful blue eyes and gorgeous blonde hair.

He was tapping his pen against the paper, staring at it. The only problem he had with studying all the time is that his mind had a tendency to wonder. Whenever he let his mind wander, he would find himself daydreaming about soft, warm lips against his. He'd be thinking about running his fingers through those blonde locks and staring into those ocean eyes.

When he woke up from those daydreams, he'd find his lips parted, his eyes had fluttered closed and he was sure if anyone was to rush past, they would've thought he was insane. Though he supposed they already thought that with all the salt hanging around. Dwight looked over at the windowsill, sighing to himself. He was going to have to redo the line over there. He'd seen one of the other Windsors leaning against it and they probably messed up the salt. He'd have to teach the freshman the importance of those lines.

He went back to daydreaming almost immediately. Those hands brushing over his cheek, running into his hair were far more interesting than Joan of Arc. He smiled as he pictured Ethan falling into his lap the way he usually did in moments like those, brushing their lips together for just a moment, playfully brushing their noses together and begging Dwight to stop working and have some fun with him. Dwight almost always said yes. How could he not?

The only thing that could break through his reverie was the sound of his phone going off. He shook his head, sighing softly as pulled it out, looking down at the message from Evan, "_I'm so sorry I have to put you through this._" What did that mean? What was happening? Was Evan about to do something horrible to him? Dwight wasn't sure of just how much more he could take.

A moment of silence passed. Dwight was looking around the room warily, his homework forgotten as he tried to figure out just what was about to go wrong. If the Tweedles had something bad planned for him, he just hoped they'd get it out of the way quickly. With all that had happened so far and everything Dwight had been through already, he wasn't sure how much more he was going to be able to take.

He was taken off guard when the doors opened, Ethan and Evan walking in with the rest of the Warblers behind them. The Warblers were Dalton Academy's Glee club and without a doubt, the coolest guys in the school. They got away with most things, and as they were in Windsor at that moment, they would probably get away with anything at all. Dwight quickly covered his books, knowing full well that the Warblers had a tendency to throw papers when they got too enthusiastic with their impromptu performances. Ethan and Evan turned to look at Dwight, Evan looking more than a little apologetic as Ethan started to sing, the warblers and Evan backing him up.

_"In the morning I could take the burning sun._  
><em>I could be the only warning, but I'm not the only.<em>  
><em>So forgive me, 'cause its more than I can bear.<em>  
><em>In demand I make my mind up by deciding not to care.<em>

_Stop giving me choices. Stop giving me choices."_

Dwight had tears in his eyes already. He knew right away that Ethan was singing this to him. He had had enough. It was clear. Dwight didn't know how to make it better though. He understood that Ethan was hurting but he had no idea how he was supposed to help Ethan choose. It was all up to him and if Dwight ever tried to help, he knew he'd only be trying to get Ethan to choose him. As Ethan moved closer to him, Dwight sunk in his seat further, wishing he could just disappear.

_"I'm the victim, of this day and age._  
><em>I've forgotten how to feel, I've forgotten how to change.<em>  
><em>So I surrender, to the apple of my eye.<em>  
><em>I surrender to the wind, I will let the wind decide.<em>

_Stop giving me choices (woah oo) Stop giving me choices (Woah oo)_  
><em>Stop giving me choices (woah oo) Stop giving me choices (Woah oo)"<em>

As the Warblers sang behind Evan and Ethan, a group picked up some papers and threw them. Dwight quickly grabbed his books, rushing to put them in his bag before they did that to his as well. He realised the lyrics were hitting close to Ethan. He realised Ethan was singing this for his benefit, to tell him how he was feeling. That didn't mean it hurt any less though. Ethan was conflicted and as long as he was conflicted, there was the possibility he would say no.

Dwight didn't want to think about what would happen if Ethan said no. He really would be all alone. Ethan was all he had. If Ethan was taken away from him, he really would have nothing. He'd be worthless. He'd felt worthless before in his life, many times but never as worthless as this, never as hopeless.

_"I could break it, I could break it till it hurts._  
><em>I could take whatever words you say, pretend I never heard.<em>  
><em>So forgive me, shouldn't be so hard.<em>  
><em>It's they way I'm put together, so you're never getting past.<em>

_Can't we talk this through? Actions are not what I'm used to._  
><em>Can't we talk this through? Actions are not what I'm used to."<em>

Ethan had stook right in front of Dwight as he sang, looking into his eyes. He could see the pain in Ethan's eyes, see the confusion and the hurt. He never wanted to make Ethan feel like that, and yet here they were. He didn't know how to make it better. As the song went on, Dwight was trying to figure out how he could make it better for the Tweedle.

Evan took over for the last two lines, the pair backing away from Dwight and moving back to the middle of the room, the Warblers standing in formation behind them. Their eyes were all trained on him and Dwight could pick out some of his friends among the group. There was Reed off to one side. He kept glancing at Dwight and then looking away guiltily, knowing how hard this must've been for Dwight. Evan kept looking at him as apologetically as he could. Dwight knew they were doing this for Ethan, because he needed it, it didn't make witnessing it any easier.

_"Stop giving me choices (woah oo) Stop giving me choices (Woah oo)_  
><em>Stop giving me choices (woah oo) Stop giving me choices (Woah oo)<em>  
><em>(I surrender)<em>  
><em>Stop giving me choices (woah oo) Stop giving me choices (Woah oo)<em>  
><em>(Just forgive me)<em>  
><em>Stop giving me choices (woah oo) Stop giving me choices (Woah oo)<em>

_Without Friction, we would float up into space._  
><em>Maybe you could be the friction that will keep me in my place.<em>  
><em>In the morning, I could take the burning sun, I could be the only warning but I'm not the only one."<em>

That last verse was like hope. Dwight looked up into Ethan's eyes as he sang it, a small smile tugging on his lips. Ethan hadn't completely given up on him then. He just had to figure out how to prove to Ethan that they were in love and needed to be together. He had ideas, he just wasn't sure Ethan would go along with any of them. As the song ended, everyone in the room cheered and clapped. Dwight quickly clapped with them, realising he was meant to be doing that, not thinking about ways to win Ethan back. Winning Ethan back was the only thing that really mattered to him though.

The group started to disperse and Dwight just acted on instinct. He grabbed Ethan's wrist, pulling him close. He didn't mean to pull him quite so close. Ethan was caught off guard and tripped into him, Dwight quickly bringing his hands up to his arms, stopping him. Ethan had ended up right there, there noses nearly brushing. Dwight could feel his breath on his skin and he shivered. He'd missed that sensation so much and the craving for a taste of those lips was so much worse when they were that close.

Those icy blue eyes were right there and they were even more beautiful when Dwight got to be that close to them. He could just keep staring into them. He'd found himself resting their heads together and just looking into Ethan's eyes more than once. Ethan would usually catch him doing it and let him know. He wanted that to happen so badly, to feel just a little closer to the Ethan that loved him.

Dwight broke the silence between them, whispering softly, "C-Can I talk to you, please?"

"Is…is this going to be like the last time we spoke?" Ethan didn't move away, speaking just as softly as Dwight was. If he was honest with himself, he liked the closeness. He liked having Dwight right there and he almost wanted to close the distance between them. That was a terrifying thought. Why did he want to do that? That wasn't right.

"No, I promise. I wanted to ask you something, that's all."

"If I answer your question, will you leave me alone?" Ethan murmured softly, biting his lip and Dwight nearly whined, it was such a beautiful thing to see. He stared at Ethan's lips for a moment, taking in every curve, the way they were just a little darker than the rest of Ethan's skin and took a shaky breath.

"Depends how you answer."

"What if I don't want you to leave me alone?"

Dwight took a shuddering breath, looking Ethan up and down. He ran his hands down Ethan's arms, threading their fingers together. Dwight hadn't expected any of this. There were so many mixed signals. He was sure Ethan didn't want him anymore, but he needed him. He was desperate, and suddenly Ethan was right there and he wasn't moving away. Dwight looked away from Ethan's lips, unable to take it anymore. He looked down at their entwined fingers instead, "I-I thought you didn't-"

"I don't know." Ethan admitted, shrugging and sighing softly, "It could be the close proximity. I mean, there are parts of me that scream no. There are parts that say I need time, to figure this out, but then there's this other part of me and it's drawn to you. No matter where we are, it's always drawing me in. I'm not saying I like it, I'm just giving up on fighting it. That's what the song was about. I have so many choices, I can't be sure what I should do."

"Which is why I need to ask you something. You can say no if you want."

Ethan leant closer, their noses brushing together, and Dwight's breath caught in his throat, "Ask me."

"Before the accident, we said we were going to go on a date, and I thought maybe…you might still be up for that?" Dwight regretted it straight away, looking away nervously. That was too much too soon. He could tell. He felt terrible already.

"You want me to go on a date with you?" Ethan smiled faintly, "Really?"

"You can say no if you want to."

"What would we do…on this date?" Ethan bit his lip again, grinning. He was so tired of fighting everything. He was just going to let everything go. It meant being closer to Dwight. There was something in the back of his mind telling him to stop but he wasn't focusing on that. He was running completely on instinct.

Dwight's eyes were fixed on Ethan's lips again, stammering when he finally managed to speak, "W-Well, I thought I would take you somewhere familiar. Nothing much. Something casual, you know? Maybe it would help you remember some things."

Ethan grinned, bumping their noses together, "I might like that."

"R-Really?"

"Really. I've been treating you like dirt, Dwight. I need to make up for that, and I need to actually try to remember some of this stuff. Maybe a date somewhere familiar will help."

Dwight went to lean closer, taking a deep breath. He didn't want to go to far, but the tiny space between them was making it difficult for him to think straight. He just wanted to run a hand through Ethan's hair, pull him close, make up for all those lonely nights. He would do anything for his Ethan back. "I-If you don't back up, I'm going to end up kissing you."

"I might be okay with that…" Ethan whispered, looking away when he said it. He wasn't sure why he was being so forward, and he wasn't sure that he liked it. He was still so conflicted, so unsure of himself.

"I'm not going to do that to you." Dwight took a step away, still holding Ethan's hands. He couldn't bring himself to let go. He was desperate for that contact, "As much as it kills me, I can't do that. You have to kiss me when you're ready. We're doing this at your pace."

"I-I'm sorry. I don't even know where all this comes from. I'm just not holding it in anymore. This is the stuff I've been thinking. All the confusing things that have me conflicted." Ethan smiled sadly.

Dwight was more than a little bit relieved to hear those words. It meant his Ethan was still in there. It meant that deep down, Ethan still had feelings for him, or at least, that's what Dwight choosed to make of it. He wanted Ethan back and this was the first piece of hope he had found that he could cling onto, "It's okay." He smiled softly, "Tweedles are notorious flirts. You are the biggest flirt I know. I'm used to it."

Ethan nodded slowly, a small smile gracing his lips and Dwight was sure he fell in love all over again when he saw that smile. It was tentative. He was so unsure of himself, yet there was just a hint in his eyes, telling Dwight that Ethan really did want this. He wanted to try and Dwight had never been so glad for that. He was being given a second chance.

Tilting his head to the side, Ethan looked into his eyes, biting his lip as he smiled, "So…tomorrow night?"

Dwight grinned, rubbing his thumbs over Ethan's hands soothingly, "Tomorrow night. I'll meet you at your dorm room and escort you to my car. I will drive. Not letting you near the wheel of a car for a long time."

"I think I'd prefer it that way." Ethan chuckled.

Dwight pulled Ethan's hand to his lips, brushing a kiss over his knuckles. He was sure he saw a tinge of red in Ethan's cheeks and he couldn't help but smile a little brighter at the sight of it. Just a little more hope, "I'll see you tomorrow, then."

Ethan nodded, smiling faintly, "Tomorrow."


	13. Chapter 13

_Chapter 13_

Dwight was freaking out. He shouldn't have been, really. It was nothing much. He wasn't taking Ethan far, but that was just it. He was taking Ethan. On a date. He was usually the one being taken on the dates, not the other way around. It wasn't that he didn't want to take Ethan on dates. It was just that he was a whole lot better at it than Dwight was.

Dwight couldn't figure out what to wear. It seemed like the most stupid, trivial thing in the world, but what he wore was so crucial. Maybe if he wore what he wore when they had the accident, it'd help trigger some memories. He couldn't do that though. There was blood on the hoodie. His favourite hoodie. He missed it so much.

He decided to just grab any hoodie, one of Ethan's that was still in his room. This one was red and Dwight wasn't sure if the colour would suit him or not but he decided to go with it. He didn't have enough time to be fussy about this sort of thing. Grabbing his black skinny jeans, the ones Ethan loved so much, Dwight quickly slipped them on. He still wasn't sure he looked okay. He really should've been trying harder for Ethan, but it wasn't about that on this date. It was about reminding Ethan of who he was, of who they were. He ran a hand through his hair, biting his lip as he looked at himself in the mirror. He couldn't quite get it to sit right. Ethan wouldn't mind, right?

He was running late. He really had to get going and pick up Ethan. Taking a deep breath, he grabbed his car keys and made his way out of the room. He wasn't sure how Ethan was going to take the night, but he decided it was worth the try. As he arrived at the Tweedles' dorm room, he took a deep breath, trying to prepare himself. He could do this. He could. All he wanted to do is see Ethan's face again.

Hesitantly, Dwight knocked on the door, looking down at the floor. He wasn't sure what he was planning on saying when Ethan opened the door, so he thought maybe it'd be best if he wasn't looking at him. It might make things the door opened, Dwight's stomach filled with butterflies, the nerves suddenly getting the better of him.

"Are you okay?" Ethan murmured, and it was just enough to make Dwight look up, his breath catching in his throat. Dwight was usually the one wearing plaid. Ethan told him he looked good in it, so to see Ethan in it took him off guard. He looked so good. Dwight couldn't stop his eyes trailing over Ethan's body, biting his lip in an attempt to stop himself groaning. He looked amazing.

"I-I'm fine." Dwight murmured, smiling fondly, "You look…wow."

Ethan chuckled softly, a red tinge creeping onto his cheeks. "I'll take that as a compliment. Thank you. Isn't that another one of my hoodies?"

"Yeah." Dwight looked down at himself, pulling at the hoodie to make sure it was sitting right and looked back up at Ethan, tilting his head to the side, "You don't mind, do you?"

"No, no." Ethan leant close, tugging gently on the strings of the hoodie, smiling cheekily, "It looks good on you."

Dwight bit his lip, wrapping his arms around Ethan and pulling him into a hug. It was all impulse but he couldn't help it. He needed to hold him in his arms again. He didn't mean to do it, really. He couldn't help it. He hadn't had Ethan really close in such a long time and suddenly there they were, about to go on a date together.

Ethan froze at first, unsure of what to do, but soon wrapped his arms around Dwight and murmured softly, "Hey, are you okay?"

Dwight couldn't quite bring himself to speak. His emotions getting the better of him. He just nodded, clinging to Ethan a little tighter.

"Then, what's wrong?" Ethan was so scared he'd said the wrong thing, he'd done something wrong, "I'm sorry."

"No." Dwight looked up, resting their heads together and murmuring softly, "No, I just…I really missed you."

"I'm not back yet. Not the me you're missing."

"You're the closest thing I've got." Dwight smiled softly, looking up into his eyes. He brushed his thumb along Ethan's jaw, leaning forward and pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek. "I know you can't say it yet, but I love you."

Ethan looked away guiltily, shuffling awkwardly on his feet, "Where are you going to take me?"

"There's a cafe near here." Dwight smiled faintly, "We had breakfast there the morning before the accident. We eat there a lot though, so I thought it might help trigger a few memories."

"Sounds fun." Ethan smiled faintly, holding out a hand and wriggling his fingers, "We going then?"

Dwight stared down at Ethan's hand. He longed for the brush of those fingertips. Against his hand, against his skin. He hesitantly threaded their fingers together, squeezing gently, "Right."

Dwight was a little bit nervous to be behind the wheel of a car again. He had driven himself home from the hospital, but this was different. Ethan was with him. It gave his memories and thoughts more to cling to. The thought of another car accident, this time taking Ethan away from him forever. Needless to say, Dwight had decided to take the long way to the cafe. It meant he got more time with Ethan anyway, and he wasn't about to turn that down.

"Can…can I…?" Ethan hesitantly held out his hand and Dwight grinned, quickly taking it.

"You can always hold my hand." Dwight murmured softly, gently squeezing his hand. He had missed that familiar touch. There was something so simple about Ethan's hand in his. So simple, yet so perfect. He hadn't realised quite how much he had missed it until that moment. He never thought he'd miss anything that much before. Ethan's hands were perfect. They gave him butterflies. Gently rubbing his thumb along Ethan's hand, Dwight glanced over at him for just a moment, smiling fondly.

"I have a confession to make." Ethan mumbled, biting his lip nervously.

"Oh?" Dwight almost didn't want to know. He liked living in this fantasy world in his head, this world where Ethan has no regrets about him, or anything to do with them. He liked that world. It was perfect, but he had a feeling the confession would do nothing more than shake the foundations of that world. Nothing is ever quite the same once the foundations are shaken. Things break, change, twist. Dwight wasn't sure he was ready for that to happen.

"Yeah. I…I've been wanting to hold your hand since I woke up in hospital."

"Really?" Dwight bit his lip, trying to stifle his grin, "You know you could've just taken my hand any time you'd wanted, right?"

"I know." Ethan looked out the window, trying to avoid Dwight's eyes, "The second you let go of my hand in that hospital, I wanted it back, but I thought I was insane, so I didn't say anything. I tried to ignore the urge after that. It's nice though. I like it." Ethan smiled fondly.

"From now on, act on instinct. Please. It seems to be working in my favour." Dwight chuckled softly.

"Deal."

As Dwight parked the car, Ethan looked around them curiously, trying to figure out if he could remember the place. It felt familiar, but he couldn't quite place it. Maybe he's been there before, but he felt like it was all brand new. He supposed that if he said that, it would disappoint Dwight. He didn't want to disappoint him. He wanted to keep that smile on his face, as much as the deep desire to do that almost scared him.

Looking over at Dwight, he smiled softly, murmuring, "This place looks really nice."

"We go here all the time." Dwight shrugged, smiling faintly, "You said you didn't like always staying at Dalton, and we both couldn't cook anyway."

Ethan chuckled softly, gently squeezing Dwight's hand without even thinking about it, "That sounds about right."

"Stay right there." Dwight quickly got out of the car, rushing to Ethan's side and the Tweedle rested his head back, laughing softly. Dwight was trying to hard. He wondered if Dwight always did this. He couldn't quite seem to remember but he was just reveling in the moment, grinning at the adorably nervous look on Dwight's face. As Dwight opened the door for him, holding out a hand, Ethan bit his lip, trying to hide the grin. Hesitantly brushing his palm against Dwight's, Ethan sighed happily as Dwight gripped his hand, helping him out of the car.

Dwight smiled faintly and Ethan was sure it was one of the cutest things he had ever seen. He tilted his head to the side, furrowing his brow, "Dwight, are you okay?"

"I'm fine. This is just a big deal." Dwight rubbed the pad of his thumb against the back of Ethan's hand, "This is the closest I've been to getting you back. This could help you remember."

"Dwight…" Ethan pulled Dwight closer, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek. He almost stopped himself, but he promised he wouldn't stop himself, he'd run on instincts. Looking into Dwight's eyes, his instinct was to kiss him. Right there, but this time he did stop himself. Instincts aside, he simply wasn't ready for that yet.

He smiled softly, paying particular attention to the beautiful darkness of Dwight's eyes as he spoke, "Just take things slow, and we'll see where we end up, okay?"

Dwight nodded slowly, "Just know that it's taking everything for me not to just press you against the car right now and ravish you."

Ethan laughed as Dwight blushed, "You mean like I-" He cut himself off, taking a deep breath. He didn't know where that had come from. He just knew that he had pressed Dwight against a car. Recently. He wasn't sure how recent it was, but he could remember it. It was scary. It wasn't like the others. He didn't just have the picture there. He had the feelings with it. He knew this one was real.

"Hey…" Dwight leant forward, pressing a reassuring hand to Ethan's shoulder, "Are you okay? What's wrong?"

"I-I remember. I remember that." Ethan clung to Dwight, taking shaky breaths. It was the first real thing he remembered. Other memories had come up every now again but never with emotions and never with so much force.

"Hey, shh, calm down. I've got you, okay?" Dwight pulled Ethan into his arms, hugging him as tightly as he could. He took a long deep breath as Ethan clutched him to his chest, running his hand soothingly up and down Ethan's back, "This is a good thing, okay? It means you're starting to remember everything."

"I-I didn't…it was a different car, but I had you pressed against it. I asked you on a date…but why did I do that?" Ethan buried his face in Dwight's neck, desperate for the comfort.

"Because you love me. I know you can't remember that yet, but you will. I know you will." Dwight pressed a gentle kiss to Ethan's forehead, "Come on, let's go inside, have our date, and see what happens, okay?"

Ethan nodded slowly, "Thank you."

As they walked in Dwight reached out without even thinking about, grabbing Ethan's hand. He felt his heart flutter when Ethan let their fingers thread together. Things were finally getting better. They were going to be okay. He just knew this was the first step on the road to recover. He would do anything he could to get Ethan back. Looking over at Ethan, he grinned, seeing a familiar spark in the other boy's eyes.

"Did I tell you you look beautiful?" Dwight murmured softly, slipping into old habits.

"No, but I think the 'wow' kind of gave off that impression." Ethan chuckled nervously, blushing, "Thank you. You do too."

Dwight smiled fondly, looking over at the cashier, "Hey. I'll have a coffee and he will have one medium caramel frappe with extra coffee and a bacon and egg bagel."

Ethan frowned, looking at Dwight curiously as he handed the money for their order over, "How did you know that I wanted that?"

Dwight chuckled, "Because you get the same thing every time we come here. I can't help it if you're predictable." He pulled on Ethan's hand, bringing him closer and whispered into his ear, "And yes, we've had this conversation before."

Ethan bit his lip nervously, looking Dwight up and down, "I can't seem to figure you out."

"Better that way, don't you think?" Dwight grinned.

Ethan chuckled, leaning into Dwight, "Yeah, okay, that's true."

Dwight took a deep breath, sighing happily as Ethan leaned into him, pressing right back and sharing their warmth. He tentatively wrapped his arm around Ethan, pulling him closer and resting his head on his shoulder, "I missed this."

"I wish I could say I did too." Ethan rested his head against Dwight's, "But it's nice."

Dwight looked up at Ethan, biting his lip to stifle a smile, "Well, I guess that's a start, huh?"

Ethan kissed Dwight's jaw, letting his lips linger there for just a moment and Dwight's eyes fluttered closed at he contact. It felt so intimate, so important. He didn't want to move. He didn't even want to open his eyes in case he was dreaming it.

Ethan chuckled softly, "Dwight, wake up. We need to take our order."

Dwight reluctantly opened his eyes, "If you can't kiss me, that's a really nice substitute, just so you know."

Ethan laughed, grabbing Dwight's order and handing it before taking his own, "I'll keep that in mind. Where are we sitting?"

"We have a booth at the back." Dwight linked his arm with Ethan's, pulling him in the right direction.

"We've got our own booth?" Ethan raised his eyebrows, smirking.

"Well, you could say it's ours." Dwight pulled Ethan over to the booth they usually sat in together, pulling him to the side he usually sat at. He put his order down, taking Ethan's and placing it on the table.

He pulled Ethan closer, "Look…" Pointing out the small D.H + E.B carved into the wall, "You did that. It was a long time ago now. You said we'd come back here years from now and we'd see it and remember our lives together."

Ethan stared at the wall for a moment, leaning closer and brushing his fingers over it. It was surreal. He could remember flashes of himself doing that. Taking a deep breath, he whispered softly, "Y-You kept telling me to stop because you thought I'd get caught."

Dwight grinned, speaking just as softly, "And you just giggled and told me to relax. No one even noticed."

"D-Dwight. Stop. Please." Ethan pulled his hand away, sitting down in the booth and taking a sip of his drink, trying to calm his nerves, "I need time to process all this."

"Right. Sorry. I got carried away with myself again."

Dwight quickly sat across from Ethan, watching him for a moment. He felt horrible for forcing so much on him so soon. He was just so desperate and as the memories started coming back, he started thinking about how close he was to getting Ethan back. Ethan picked up his drink, taking a longer sip and looked over at Dwight from across the table, frowning.

"What?"

Dwight looked down at the cup in front of him, "I just…I'm so glad you agreed to come tonight. I didn't think you would."

"How could I say no to you?" Ethan chuckled, "I don't know, I just wanted to see you. It feels wrong, being away from you for so long. I have trouble sleeping sometimes and I don't know why."

Dwight smiled faintly, tapping his fingers gently against the table, "You know I've been having the same problem. It's not the same without you. The closest thing I have it that pillow that smells like you."

Ethan shifted in his seat, leaning closer, "You have a pillow that smells like me?"

"The whole room does." Dwight blushed, "You spent so long in there with me, it started smelling like you."

Ethan blushed, biting his lip, "I didn't realise I'd spent so long in there."

Dwight nodded quickly, "You're with me most of the time, and when you're not with me, you usually have something of mine on you. It's been this way for so long now, I just got used to it."

"Do you…do you have something of mine on you right now? Other than the hoodie, I mean."

"Yeah." Dwight bit his lip nervously, pulling a necklace out from under the hoodie, "You said it was good luck, but you liked me to wear it."

Ethan held his hand out impulsively, brushing his fingertips over the necklace, smiling fondly, "I got that when I was just a kid. I always thought it was good luck."

"I-If you want it back, you can have it back. It wouldn't be right for me to keep it if you didn't want me to have it." Dwight almost regretted saying it, really. He wanted to keep the necklace. He knew it didn't really give him any luck at all but it made him feel like it did, knowing that Ethan thought it did. That was enough for him. He didn't want to let go of that hope.

"No. No, I want you to keep it." Ethan smiled reassuringly, looking down at his food bashfully.

Dwight had missed Ethan like this. It was nearly his Ethan, nearly the one who loved him. He was so close to getting him back, he could tell. It was a little hard, not to be able to reach across that table, pull Ethan to him and kiss him, especially when he was being so sweet, but Dwight was at a crucial point. He didn't want to do anything to mess this up, so he sat in his place, gently tapping his finger against the table and watching Ethan fondly.

He wasn't expecting Ethan to cover his hand with his own. He wasn't prepared for the feel of soft fingertips against his. Dwight's stomach filled with butterflies as he stared at their hands, not wanting to say anything, not wanting to let anything spoil that simple, perfect moment.

"Relax." Ethan whispered, causing Dwight to look back up at him, "I'm not going anywhere. I promise."

Dwight couldn't quite find his words, taking a deep, shaky breath. He hadn't expected anything like this. He hadn't expected Ethan to be so kind and for him to try so hard for him. Looking into those perfect blue eyes, he wanted to say those three words all over again, but he wouldn't. He didn't want to spoil the moment, knowing Ethan couldn't say it back, not yet, but there was hope in those eyes. Dwight knew deep down that it was going to get better. They were going to be okay.


	14. Chapter 14

_Chapter 14_

When they had finished their food, they had just sat there for a while, content to just be with each other. It was simple. It was what they needed. Dwight needed the closeness. He needed it to reassure him that Ethan was there, and he wasn't about to disappear again. He was going to stay and try to figure it out with him. Ethan needed the quiet to help him gather his thoughts. He had Dwight there to help him through it but this was really what he needed more than anything else to help him start the healing process. He needed this to help him figure out where he was supposed to go from there.

"We should get going." Dwight murmured, smiling sadly. He wanted to stay a little longer, but he had other plans for the night that he needed to continue onto. They were important. They would help Ethan remember, he was sure of it.

"We can't stay just a little longer. I-I'm having a lot more fun than I thought I would." Ethan looked over at Dwight with sad eyes. Dwight felt bad, looking into those eyes. He didn't want Ethan to look so upset.

"I have more plans though Ethan. We should go now before it gets too late."

"We're not going home?"

"Well, we are. There's somewhere I want to take you at Dalton. I hope you don't mind." Dwight smiled bashfully, "But we should really get going now."

"Oh. Okay." Ethan rubbed his thumb against the back of Ethan's hand, "Let's go then."

x X x

Dwight felt uneasy getting back into the car. It was the way home that got them last time, and this time was only made worse by the darkness. He hadn't even started the car yet, but he was already gripping the steering wheel tightly, taking a long, deep breath.

"Hey…" Ethan rested his hand on Dwight's arm, tilting his head to the side, "We're going to be okay. Just take the long way again, right?"

Dwight nodded quickly, "R-Right. Sorry. I just lost you once, and I'm starting to get you back. I don't want to lose you again."

Ethan squeezed Dwight's arm reassuringly, smiling softly, "It's different this time. It won't happen the same way. We'll be fine."

"I know." Dwight took one hand away from the wheel, rubbing his hand gently. "Thank you."

Hesitantly, he started up the car, pulling out of the car park.

Ethan had reluctantly let go of Dwight's arm, moving his hand to Dwight's knee, squeezing gently. Dwight sighed happily, taking comfort in the small gesture. Just the touch of Ethan's hand was enough to make him relax, because he was there. He was safe and he was with him and Dwight knew everything would be okay as long as they had each other. It was perfect. He was perfect. Dwight couldn't wait to take Ethan where he had planned to take him, to hopefully fill in some more of the missing memories.

He wondered how long it would take, how hard it would hit him. He didn't want it to hit Ethan too hard. The way he reacted to the simple memory in the car park had Dwight worried. If Ethan reacted badly, he mightn't want to remember any more. Dwight needed him to remember. He decided he'd do absolutely everything in his power to help Ethan through it.

"What are you thinking about?" Ethan asked curiously, "You're being so quiet and you look so serious."

"You. I'm thinking about you. I'm going to do everything I can to help you through this, you know that, right?"

"I know Dwight." Ethan smiled brightly. He rubbed his thumb along Dwight's knee, causing him to shiver, "I know that you've just been trying to help me all this time, and I know I was horrible to you. I was just scared. I trust you. I do. I know you're going to help me."

"You weren't horrible to me, Ethan. The situation was. Is. It is to both of us."

Dwight wanted to glance over at Ethan, to see his reassuring smile, but he couldn't bring himself to do that. He had to be careful driving. He still wasn't ready to relax behind the wheel of a car, especially not with Ethan sat next to him.

x X x

Ethan had his hand rested on Dwight's knee for the entire journey back to Dalton. Dwight supposed that would've been a distraction usually, but for him in those moments, he really just saw it as a comfort. Ethan was looking after him and he was so grateful. Even when he was supposed to be the one protecting Ethan, he found a way of surprising him and coming through for him. Dwight supposed that was what Tweedles did; surprised people.

As he parked the car in the Dalton car park, he looked over at Ethan, the faintest of smiles tugging at his lips. Ethan always looked so beautiful in the moonlight. It would catch his ice blue eyes and somehow make them look even more beautiful than usual.

When Dwight finally got himself to stop staring into those perfect eyes, he spoke quietly, "Are you ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be." Ethan smiled brightly.

Ethan was nervous. He knew this was going to be something to help him remember and that was just a little bit worrying. He figured he'd seen everything in Dalton though, so there couldn't possibly be anything new for Dwight to show him.

"I promise I won't push anything on you, okay? I'll take this slow and I'll give you time to figure out whatever memories hopefully come to you."

"Thank you. For being so understanding." Ethan smiled gratefully.

He couldn't help but laugh when Dwight got out of the car and rushed around to his side once more, opening the door for him and holding out a hand. Taking off his seat belt, Ethan took his hand, stepping out of the car and pulling Dwight close, "You know that isn't necessary, right?"

"It is though." Dwight leant close, their noses barely touching, "I want to make you feel special. That's what I do. I make you feel special."

Ethan blushed, looking away and shuffling awkwardly on his feet, "W-We should get going, right? You said it was getting late."

"Right." Dwight chuckled softly, holding out his arm and grinning as Ethan's linked with his, "Hopefully this will go as well as I'd planned."

x X x

Ethan had absolutely no idea where Dwight was taking him. They were walking across the school campus together. It was nice to walk through the gardens at night. He couldn't help it, moving on instinct and resting his head against Dwight's shoulder. He sighed happily, not wanting to break the silence. He did want to ask. He wanted to know where it was that Dwight was taking him, but he would do anything to keep that beautiful, simple, perfect silence going.

Dwight looked over at him, smiling fondly, "We're not too far now. We can't be long though. Curfew is soon."

Ethan hadn't even taken curfew into account. He was so focused on them and the perfection of everything around them, everything that was happening. Dwight had him completely transfixed and he wouldn't ever change that.

"Is this place special?" Ethan supposed that was a really stupid question. Of course it was special, Dwight was taking him there, showing him everything he could to help him remember. He wasn't sure what it was about wherever Dwight was taking him that made him think that it would be enough for Ethan to remember, but he supposed that if Dwight thought it was truly that special, it must've been important.

"One of the most special places I know." Dwight smiled softly.

"A-And I know it too?" Ethan asked cautiously.

"Yes. You definitely do. I took you here a long time ago, and you took me here after that. It's sort of become our place."

Ethan nodded, smiling as he took in Dwight's words. That meant it had to be special, right? If it was a place they shared, he was sure there must've been some very important memories wherever it was Dwight was taking him. Ethan's patience was wearing thin though. He wanted to know. He wanted to remember. He was so anxious to get there and to see things the way Dwight did, the way he once did.

When Dwight suddenly stopped walking, Ethan wasn't sure if his heart stopped with them, or sped up. They were there, right? That surely meant they were there, but Ethan looked around and it was all as everything else was. Just more trees as far as the eye could see. He couldn't quite figure out why this of all spots was so important.

"A-Are we here?" He asked Dwight, his nerves showing through his voice. He wasn't sure why they were there, really. He knew what Dwight was wanting to achieve from this, but it just looked like most of Dalton. He couldn't see why it was so special.

Dwight turned to face Ethan, holding both of his hands and suddenly Ethan realised just how important this was to him. He took a shaky breath, looking into Dwight's eyes.

"Right here, this spot, was where he had our third date." Dwight smiled fondly at the memory.

Ethan frowned. Why would they have a date there? And why was a third date so significant? A first date, sure. An anniversary, understandable, but just the third date? "We had a date here? Why here?"

"You said you loved looking up at the stars." Dwight grinned, chuckling softly, "It was cute, really. I couldn't say no to that."

Ethan smiled softly, "I guess that makes sense too. I've always thought the stars are beautiful." He looked up at the stars for a moment, looking back at Dwight and biting his lip, "Kind of like your eyes…"

Dwight blushed, looking away, "I-I…so…I took you here. This is where we had our third date and I attempted to cook."

Ethan laughed out loud, "Oh my God, you tried to cook!" He giggled softly, relieved that Dwight hadn't taken offence and was simply grinning at Ethan's reaction, "Did you burn the kitchen down?"

"No, but I had to make at least two of everything."

Ethan snickered, "You did that for me?"

"Of course."

Ethan smiled fondly, leaning close and pressing a kiss to Dwight's forehead. He sighed happily. He remembered bits, but not emotions, not yet anyway. Dwight had been so good to him. He was so lucky. If this was all true, he couldn't quite be sure that he deserved any of it. Dwight was giving him so much. "You're so good to me, Dwight."

"Y-Yeah, well, this date was really important. The third date was the date I gave you the ring that you're wearing. Our third date was the date you promised your heart to me."

Ethan gasped, pressing their heads together. He tried to remember. It was so important. So crucial. Looking down at the ring on his finger, "I-I didn't know why but I didn't want to take the ring off."

"I was glad you didn't. I think I would've lost all hope if you had." Dwight pulled Ethan's hand to his lips, kissing the ring.

Ethan could sort of remember it. Dwight had gone down on one knee when he gave it to him. Ethan had frozen when he did. He thought Dwight was trying to propose or something. They'd just started dating and it was too much for Ethan too soon, but then Dwight was saying those words, those beautiful words and Ethan needed to give Dwight his heart. Deep down, he knew he already had.

Ethan's eyes filled with tears as he started to remember it, started to remember how he felt, "Y-You were so sweet. You already had my heart, you know? You always had my heart."

Dwight hugged Ethan tightly, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you cry."

"No. No, it's just a lot to take in. I'm happy. I promise." Ethan smiled softly, hugging Dwight as tightly as he could. He clung to Dwight's warmth. He was perfect. He was so perfect and Ethan wasn't sure what he did to deserve him, really. He was doing everything to make it easier for him and asked nothing in return, no matter how painful it was for him.

Suddenly it was so simple. How he hadn't seen it before, with the way Dwight had been treating him, trying so hard to make him happy and make sure he was okay, he didn't know. He looked into Dwight's eyes, taking a deep breath, "I…I love you, Dwight."

Dwight just stared at him for a moment, trying to take that in. He hadn't expected Ethan to say it. He had missed hearing it so much. It was one of those things he'd heard every day and so, had ended up taking it for granted. It had been too long since he'd heard those words from Ethan's lips.

Ethan was so scared. Dwight hadn't frozen with him like this before. He held Dwight a little bit tighter, hoping he would wake up from the trance he seemed to be in. Maybe he shouldn't have said it. He was already regretting it, simply because of the way Dwight was reacting. He didn't think it would hurt him, but maybe it had, "I'm sorry…I didn't mean to-"

"Don't you dare apologise for saying that." Dwight murmured, smiling fondly, "I love you too, Ethan.

Ethan's heart swelled. He couldn't stop smiling. Dwight had said it a few times before, but this time he could remember the feelings, he could remember how much he wanted Dwight to say those words and how good it made him feel to hear them. It was perfect.

He pulled Dwight closer, cupping his face in his hand, brushing their noses together, and parting his lips, "C-Can I kiss you?"

"You never have to ask me that." Dwight smiled fondly.

Ethan chuckled softly, unsure of himself. He was sure, judging by the memories, that he had kissed Dwight before, but this was like the first time. The gap between them was so small it didn't take much to close it, pressing their lips gently together. Dwight's lips were so soft and warm and Ethan melted into the kiss straight away, sighing softly.

It was all so soft and sweet and Ethan melted further and further, moving closer. Suddenly there was a tongue hesitantly flicked over Ethan's bottom lip and it felt so familiar. He ran a hand into Dwight's hair, holding him in place as he parted his lips, swiping his own tongue against Dwight's lips, smirking as the hunter groaned softly.

Ethan felt his confidence boost at the sound, flicking his tongue into Dwight's mouth for just a moment. Dwight moaned, holding Ethan a little closer. He reluctantly pulled away for air, whispering into Ethan's lips, "Don't you dare start teasing me now…"

Ethan chuckled, nipping softly on Dwight's lip, "You like it."

"Two can play at that game."

"I'd like to see you try."

"Oh God, I missed this." Dwight grinned, wrapping his arms tightly around Ethan's neck, holding him close and sucking his bottom lip into his mouth, earning a soft groan. He let his teeth graze gently over the soft skin and Ethan whined softly, Dwight tugging on his lip as he pulled away, "Thank you…for the best date ever."

Dwight chuckled, "You're so welcome."


	15. Chapter 15

_Chapter 15_

Dwight hadn't expected this. It was so much so soon but he was so bereft of affection by this point that he just didn't care. He groaned softly as Ethan tugged gently on a strand of his hair, biting his lip. The kiss had started out so sweet, so innocent, yet as they slowly made their way towards Windsor, hands started to roam, kisses got more passionate and Dwight was wondering how the hell he lasted that long without Ethan's tongue in his mouth.

They hadn't even parted to open the door, Dwight reaching out aimlessly for the handle and moaning as Ethan grazed his teeth along his tongue, pulling him down the halls. He didn't even care if anyone saw them at that point. He was so far gone, so caught up in the moment because Ethan was there, his arms moving around Dwight's body and their lips pressed firmly together. Nothing else mattered.

It was like Ethan was suddenly remembering everything and Dwight could only be grateful that Ethan was such a good learner because this was all so much, so good, such sensory overload in all the right ways. He wanted more, craved it, but he wouldn't. He needed to move at Ethan's pace, even if he was moving much faster than Dwight had expected.

Dwight hadn't realised how far down the hall they'd gotten, gasping as Ethan pressed him firmly to the door, "E-Ethan…"

"Let me in…" Ethan nipped softly on Dwight's lips, their bodies flush together and it was all Dwight could do not to roll his hips forward.

"W-What?"

"Don't want the night to end…"

"But Ethan…we should slow down."

"I'll slow down. I can go slower, please Dwight, I need this."

Dwight didn't want to argue. He couldn't, really. Ethan was all but begging him to let him stay in his room, something he'd thought he wouldn't ever get to do again. Taking a deep breath, Dwight nodded slowly, turning in Ethan's hold and pulling his keys out of his pocket. Ethan kept his arms wrapped around Dwight from behind, pressing kisses to his skin and causing Dwight's hand to shake as he tried to get the key in the lock. Once Dwight finally got the key in the lock, Ethan licked a line along his neck, causing the hunter to gasp, tilting his head to the side, "God, you're such a tease…"

"Hurry up." Ethan whispered in Dwight's ear and he swore that was the sexiest sound in the world. There was so much promise in those two words. He had absolutely no idea what it was Ethan was planning to do, but he knew it'd be good. It always was.

Finally getting the door open, Ethan immediately turned Dwight in his arms, pressing their lips back together in a passionate kiss. It was all desperation, and want, and need. They had gone so long trying to deny that need but now, finally they could let go and give in to each other.

Dwight groaned into Ethan's lips, biting gently, "Mmm baby, I missed you so much…"

"I don't know why I was fighting this for so long." Ethan slipped a hand into Dwight's back pocket, pulling him closer.

It took all of Dwight's will power not to go over the top, not to pounce on him, not to use all the techniques they'd learnt together to turn Ethan into a quivering mess, begging for more.

"I could drive you crazy, you know? I could have you screaming." Dwight ran his hands under Ethan's shirt, digging his nails into his skin just enough before whispering into his lips, "But I won't."

Ethan moaned, pulling Dwight towards the bed, "Why not? I want you to. I want you to do everything you usually do to me, Dwight…"

"No." Dwight kissed Ethan softly, pulling away after a moment, "We go at your pace, which means, I'm following your lead."

"How far have we gone…you and me?" Ethan's voice showed just a little bit of nerves and Dwight took a moment to look Ethan up and down appreciatively, kissing his neck.

"All the way."

"Oh thank God." Ethan pulled Dwight into a searing kiss, groaning softly.

He pushed Dwight onto the bed and Dwight wasn't exactly sure what to expect. He hadn't expected a reaction like that. Ethan was all need and hunger and desire and Dwight wasn't sure how long he was going to last with him like this.

As Ethan crawled over him, a mischievous smirk on his lips, Dwight knew he was done for. He knew Ethan had plans and suddenly it was like he wanted to fight back. He wanted to show Ethan just what he could do, how good he could make him feel, but there would be other times for that. This was Ethan's turn, his turn to reintroduce himself to Dwight's body.

Ethan brushed his nose along Dwight's cheek and the hunter couldn't help but sigh happily, wanting to keep that close, that intimate. It was a simple action, but it was so sweet and Dwight kind of wanted him to do it again.

As Ethan's hands moved slowly down Dwight's chest, he pressed soft kisses to Dwight's jaw, slowly moving down to his neck. Dwight didn't want it to end. He wanted Ethan to move faster, yet he would've loved for time to slow down too, just a little, just enough to make it last.

Ethan looked up at Dwight for a moment, smiling softly. He pressed a delicate kiss to Dwight's neck, slowly pressing more and more kisses to the spot and applying more and more pressure. Dwight groaned softly, tilting his head to the side to give Ethan more room. He'd been rough with Ethan before and could handle just about any amount of pressure Ethan gave him.

As Ethan let his teeth gently drag over Dwight's skin, he hunter moaned, doing everything he could to stop his hips from rolling forward impulsively. Ethan's teeth were guaranteed to make Dwight gasp, and groan, and mewl, and beg for more.

Dwight ran his fingers into Ethan's hair, his eyes fluttering closed as Ethan let his teeth gently brush over his skin once more, "Mmm…"

Dwight gasped, moaning softly as Ethan applied the slightest pressure, his teeth running along sensitive skin. It was like the sound spurred Ethan on, causing him to dig his teeth in a little further and Dwight whined softly, gripping Ethan's hair and pressing him down further, urging him to do more, to keep going.

Ethan took the less than subtle hint, sinking his teeth into Dwight's skin. The hunter mewled softly, moving subtly into the touch. He opened his mouth in a silent moan as Ethan began to suck his skin, unable to stop his hips from rocking forward. It was all instinct, he couldn't help himself when Ethan was marking his skin like that and he needed Ethan to keep going, to do more. He needed more.

Ethan moaned, grinding his hips down into Dwight's and pulled away from his neck, kissing the mark he'd left behind. Dwight couldn't contain his moan as he looked into Ethan's eyes and saw how dark they'd become, lust filled, and wanton.

Ethan leant forward, growling into Dwight's lips, "Patience. I want to do some more exploring…".

Dwight bit his lip, staring into Ethan's eyes for a moment more, "I'm all yours."

"Mmm yes, you are…" Ethan let his fingers slide under Dwight's hoodie, slowly pulling it up to reveal beautiful, pale flesh.

The way Ethan licked his lips as he got a glimpse of Dwight's body was enough to have the hunter moaning in itself, as Ethan slid the hoodie off, it all got so much better. Dwight watched Ethan carefully as he ran his hands up his chest.

"You're so beautiful." Ethan murmured, causing Dwight to chuckle.

"You say that every time."

"Has it ever not been true?"

"I could ask you the same question." Dwight groaned as Ethan let his fingers catch on a nipple.

Ethan chuckled softly, leaning forward and flicking his tongue against the skin just neck to Dwight's nipple, causing his breath to catch. Ethan grinned, enjoying watching and causing reactions in the hunter. He pressed a kiss to the nipple, taking his time and letting his tongue flick over the sensitive skin.

"E-Ethan…" Dwight moaned, arching his back into the touch, trying to get used to the sensation. It had been so long, he couldn't help but be swept away by the sheer pleasure of everything Ethan was doing to him, the thought of everything that was to come only making things worse.

Ethan chuckled softly, running his tongue tortuously slowly over Dwight's nipple. The hunter moaned louder this time, throwing his head back, "F-Fuck, Ethan…"

"Soon, Dwight." Ethan murmured, chuckling softly. Finally, Ethan grazed his teeth over Dwight's nipple and he was sure that would be enough to ruin him. That one simple action had Dwight writhing, moaning and shuddering as pleasure washed through him.

"M-More…Ethan, oh God, please. I know w-we're going at your pace but this is torture." Dwight almost begged, running his hands under Ethan's shirt, "You're still wearing so many layers…"

Ethan laughed, slipping off his shirt, "Better?"

Dwight grinned, sitting up, "Much."

He wrapped an arm around Ethan's torso, pressing his lips to one of Ethan's nipples. He smirked as the Tweedle moaned, his hand impulsively moving into Dwight's hair and urging him to keep going. He licked gently on the nipple at first, nipping gently and causing Ethan to whine softly, throwing his head back.

"Mmm Dwight, you're so good at that."

Dwight chuckled softly. He'd learnt everything from Ethan. It was amazing to get to do that with Ethan again after all that time. He needed more, he craved it. He hadn't expected after all the time that had passed for it to be that good.

Dwight wanted to pleasure Ethan too. He wanted to show him how much he missed him, but he needed to keep going at his pace, so teasing him with kisses and licks was the most he could do, not that he minded. The sounds the actions elicited were well worth it.

Ethan pulled Dwight up, into a passionate kiss. It was a battle for dominance Dwight would always say he let Ethan win, even though they both knew Ethan always did. Ethan was all about control and Dwight was all about being dominated. It didn't take much for him to give in, to follow Ethan's lead. Ethan laced their fingers together, pressing Dwight's hands to the bed, grinning down at him as he was pinned there.

"What are you going to do now?" Dwight murmured softly, grinning.

"Oh, I don't know." Ethan straddled Dwight's hips, grinding against him and earning a soft groan from the hunter, "I can think of a few things."

"Stop thinking, and start doing!" Dwight ran his fingers down Ethan's back, nipping gently on his lip.

Ethan chuckled softly, running his hands along Dwight's body. He looked Dwight up and down carefully, biting his lip as he smirked. Normally Dwight would've been uneasy at the gaze but this was just another thing that Ethan always did. He kind of liked it if he was honest. He liked knowing that Ethan liked what he saw when he looked at him.

Ethan grinned shuffling down Dwight's body and pressed his palm firmly against the bulge in his pants, earning a quiet groan as Dwight pressed himself closer.

"What do you want?" Ethan whispered, looking up at him.

Dwight couldn't quite think straight with Ethan's hand right there, applying just the right amount of pressure, "A-Anything. Ethan, please…"

Ethan smirked, subtly rubbing his hand along the bulge, causing Dwight to choke on a moan. He spread his legs a little more rocking his hips into Ethan's hand. It was amazing to be so close to Ethan again and to feel his hands on him like that. He wasn't sure he'd ever feel it again and as Ethan fiddled with his belt, Dwight whined softly, throwing his head back.

Dwight whimpered pitifully at the loss of Ethan's hand, watching him carefully as he slowly slid down his pants. He groaned softly as Ethan kept eyes on his, smirking.

Ethan looked over Dwight licking his lips once more and flicking his tongue over the tip of his length.

Dwight bit down hard on his lip, trying not to moan, trying not to give Ethan the satisfaction of knowing just what he was doing to him. Ethan simply took it as a challenge, scratching his nails along Dwight's thighs and slowly ran his tongue along the underside of Dwight, grinning as the hunter writhed, clutching at the bed sheets, "E-Ethan…fuck, d-don't stop…"

Ethan chuckled softly, running his fingers up and down Dwight's thighs, causing the hunter to shiver. He smirked, looking up at Dwight, "You're so desperate for it, aren't you?"

"It's been so long Ethan, please…"

It was like Ethan knew. He knew he was teasing and torturing and he knew how much Dwight loved that, but he knew how much Dwight needed this, how much he craved it. Carefully spreading Dwight's thighs, Ethan slowly took Dwight into his mouth, causing the hunter to cry out on pleasure, throwing his head back and running his hands into Ethan's hair, gripping tightly.

Dwight couldn't think straight anymore. He had been wanting it for so long, craving Ethan's touch and now that he had it, it was almost too much to bear. It took all his self control not to thrust into Ethan's mouth, the wet heat sending him closer and closer to the edge. He didn't want to let go though. He wasn't ready. He needed the moment to last.

As Ethan started moving, bobbing his head and alternating between sucking hard and soft, Dwight wasn't sure how long he'd be able to last. He wanted to hold on. He wanted Ethan to give him more, this wasn't enough, but he just couldn't hold it in much longer.

"E-Ethan…so close…"

With Dwight's words, Ethan quickly pulled away, Dwight whining sadly at the loss, "Hold on. I'm not finished with you yet."

Dwight growled, flipping them. He knew he was meant to be going at Ethan's pace and that this was about him but he couldn't take the teasing anymore. He was allowed to take those pants off. He was allowed to touch Ethan, just a little. If Ethan could get away with it, so too could he.

Ethan looked up at him, biting his lip, stifling a grin, "Mmm so forceful, I love it."

Dwight quickly undid Ethan's pants, slipping them off, and looked Ethan up and down. He was beginning to think he'd never get to see Ethan like that again. So vulnerable, so beautiful, so perfect. He let his fingers trail along Ethan's sides, causing him to shiver, keeping his eyes trained on Dwight's.

Dwight smiled softly up at him, brushing his fingers over Ethan's length. The Tweedle groaned softly, moving his hips subtly into the touch. That was all the encouragement Dwight needed to start stroking him, groaning softly as Ethan gasped, thrusting into his hand. He loved knowing he could do that to Ethan. In one moment, he could have Ethan gasping, groaning, begging, and Dwight always wanted to make it last when he did it. He wanted to watch Ethan, see the pleasure he was giving him.

"Ethan…what do you want? This is about you. Tell me what you want…" He urged, speeding up his stroked and earning a soft whine.

"I want you. I-I want to make you scream." Ethan looked down at Dwight, his voice rough, "I want to remember what it feels like to be inside you."

Dwight's hand on Ethan stopped for a moment, just staring at Ethan. This was all one thing but he hadn't expected Ethan to want to go that far. He kept thinking about it, thinking about Ethan inside him, pounding into him like he always did and Dwight was sure he wouldn't last long. He wanted it though, and if Ethan wanted it too, he wasn't about to say no.

"Make love to me, Ethan." Dwight murmured, biting his lip, and that was all Ethan needed.

Ethan leant forward, pulling Dwight down to him and pressing their lips together in a gentle kiss, his fingers tangling into Dwight's hair. It was soft and sweet and Dwight felt himself melt into the kiss, moving closer and sighing happily. He bit gently on Ethan's lip, smiling fondly as Ethan nipped gently on his, rolling them and holding him down on the bed once more.

"I need to prepare you." Ethan murmured into his lips, making no move to pull away.

Dwight quickly shook his head, running his fingers through Ethan's hair, "No. I need you now. I want to feel it Ethan, please…"

"A-Are you sure?"

Dwight growled softly into Ethan's lips, "Do it, Ethan."

Ethan grinned, grazing his teeth along Dwight's lip. Dwight couldn't help but grin as Ethan opened the top drawer, knowing exactly where they kept the condoms. At least he was remembering things, even if he wasn't realising it.

He watched as Ethan slid the condom on, biting his lip. He didn't think this would happen so soon. He didn't realise how badly he wanted it, how much he missed it, but as Ethan lined himself up, making sure Dwight was ready, he knew he needed it. Moaning as Ethan started pressing into him, Dwight dug his nails roughly into his back, throwing his head back and crying out in pleasure. It felt like an eternity before Ethan was all the way in but it was perfect.

Dwight wasn't sure how long he was going to last like that, groaning and arching his back, "Move Ethan…p-please…"

Ethan groaned, thrusting into Dwight and he was sure he was going to lose control. His hips moved with Ethan's, urging him to keep going.

Ethan moved faster, spurred on by the sounds spilling from Dwight's lips. He moaned, moving his hand to Dwight's length, stroking in rhythm with his thrusts. Dwight cried out, thrusting into Ethan's hand and moving with him, scratching his nails down his back.

"F-Fuck Ethan, c-can't take much more…"

Ethan sped up his thrusts, matching it with his strokes and moaned, "Let go Dwight…s-scream…"

Dwight thrust his hips into Ethan's hand once more before finally letting go, arching his back and screaming Ethan's name. As he tightened around Ethan, that was enough to set him off too, throwing his head back and crying out as he came undone.

Dwight melted into the sheets, smiling lazily. He hadn't felt that good in so long. He groaned softly as Ethan pulled out, watching him toss the condom to the bin and crawl up to him. He smiled fondly up at Ethan, brushing his fingers along his cheek, "I love you."

"I love you too." Ethan grinned, kissing Dwight softly and wrapping his arms around his waist.

"Stay tonight." Dwight almost wanted to beg.

"I'm not going anywhere."


	16. Chapter 16

_Chapter 16_

Ethan felt warm. He wasn't sure why he felt so warm but he was in absolutely no position to complain about it. Sighing softly, he kept his eyes closed, clinging to the pillow in front of him. At least, in his sleepy state, he thought it was a pillow. Smiling at the feeling, the warmth and the safety. He felt that safety there too. He wasn't thinking clearly, but he didn't feel like he needed to. Wherever he was, he knew he would be okay, though he wasn't entirely sure how he knew that. He just did for some reason.

Suddenly Ethan felt this weight around him. It was there before, but now it had a tighter hold around him. It was warm. It felt kind of nice, in a strange sort of way. He wasn't all that sure of what it was, but he wasn't complaining either. It was snaked around his waist, pressing him closer to the pillow, that perfectly warm pillow. Not too warm, but not too cold either, just right. He didn't know what it was about where he was laying, still barely awake, eyes still shut tight, but he knew that it was just perfect.

Ethan gently ran his fingers along it. It was so nice and warm. Soft. It felt good beneath his fingertips. As he got further and further along, he felt the shape change and finally realised. It was an arm. It was Dwight's arm. He had stayed the night with Dwight that Dwight was holding him close as they slept. It felt nice to be so wanted by someone that wasn't his brother. He never really expected it. The way Dwight's arm tightened around him if Ethan moved away too far caused Ethan to smile, shuffling closer, like he knew Dwight wanted.

He didn't expect to find himself there that morning. He knew he really liked Dwight. He wasn't sure where that had come from at all, he just did. There was something about the way Dwight cared for him like that, looked after him. He knew he's always be safe with Dwight. It was perfect, really. He kept Ethan safe. He kept Ethan happy. The date the night before had been proof of that. Dwight was so worried about Ethan getting hurt and he tried so hard to make him happy, he did everything he could to make the night perfect.

Dwight was adorable, really. That's what Ethan thought. He had the cutest black mop of hair that fell into his eyes. Ethan loved pushing it away for him, to look at those gorgeous brown eyes of his. Dwight's eyes were really pretty. That's what Ethan told himself. They were so dark and almost mysterious. You could only really tell that they were brown and not black in the right light. There was something about Dwight's eyes. Such pain and sorrow within them, but more than that, such hope. Ethan loved looking into those eyes and seeing the little spark.

Looking at Dwight now, his eyes closed, he could see how long his eyelashes were. They were beautiful. It was amazing to be able to just look at Dwight like this, knowing that Dwight liked it, wanted it. Dwight seemed to crave his attention and now that Ethan had finally given up the fight, he was more than willing to give that attention. He ran a hand through Dwight's hair, smiling fondly as the younger boy leant into the touch. He didn't expect Dwight to lean into it like that, but he liked it, and somehow deep down, he knew he would.

He let his fingers run down Dwight's side, shifting closer to share their warmth. He hadn't thought he'd have gone as far as he did the night before. He just sort of lost control. He wanted to remember, to feel and he did. He remembered the things Dwight liked and he remembered how it felt when Dwight did the things he loved right back. He remembered the soft touches and the sweet kisses, the way things could go from rough and needy, to sweet and tender in moments, and then quickly go right back again. He remembered how it felt to be in love with Dwight Houston.

His heart fluttered at the thought. He was in love. He was in love with Dwight Houston and he didn't know how on Earth he could've ever forgotten that, how he could've forgotten the way they looked at each other, the way they held each other and whispered to each other. He was amazed he couldn't remember the way Dwight smiled at him, and what that meant. Ethan only wished he could've remembered that sooner. He'd missed out on so much time. So much they could've been doing while he was trying to fight the one thing he really wanted.

The memories had come during he night mostly. He dreamt them. He remembered the way they'd gotten together. He had filled Dwight's room to the brim with roses. Red, orange, yellow, pink, white, every colour you could imagine a rose could be. There was no bare counter in Dwight's room. Even his bed was covered in them, and when Dwight had come back from lessons, he'd opened the door to find all those, and in among them, was Ethan. Dwight didn't know what to think. Ethan had already filled his room with things before but that time it was different, and when Ethan walked over to him, taking his hands, and asking him to be with him, Dwight had smiled more than Ethan had ever seen before.

He remembered their first date, and the way Dwight was so nervous he barely spoke. He remembered the first kiss, the way Dwight had frozen, terrified he'd do something wrong. He smiled fondly as he watched Dwight sleep, memories flooding his mind. He even remembered the nerf fights they'd have, as hard as that was to believe. The memories had all come so quickly, it took Ethan some time to get through them all. It took him even longer to decide he was okay with every thought running through his head. It was a little overwhelming.

As Dwight began to stir, Ethan moved closer, resting his chin on the pillow beside him and watching him curiously. He smiled fondly as Dwight sniffled, his hold around Ethan's waist becoming tight. He wasn't sure whether he remembered that or not, but it was nice. Dwight buried his face in Ethan's neck, taking a deep breath and causing Ethan to giggle as it tickled against his skin.

Dwight's eyes slowly fluttered open, pulling away from Ethan just enough to look up at him. Ethan bit his lip, trying to stifle his grin. Dwight was clearly still trying to get his head to start working. He just kept staring at Ethan for a moment, and Ethan didn't move. He didn't want to. He wanted to see what Dwight was going to say. He was worried that somehow, someway he'd screwed it up and Dwight wouldn't want him anymore. It would just be his luck to push Dwight away for so long, only to be pushed away as he changed his mind, and realised just how he felt.

Though, as it happened, Dwight didn't do that at all. He just moved closer, smiling brightly as he held Ethan to his chest. He pressed gentle kisses along Ethan's shoulder and up to his neck, whispering softly, "Mmm good morning."

Ethan sighed softly, running his hand down Dwight's spine, causing him to shiver, "Good morning."

Dwight smiled faintly as he reached Ethan's jaw, pressing feather light kisses along his skin until he reached Ethan's lips, speaking softly into them, "Did you sleep okay?"

Ethan ran his hand up Dwight's back once more, nodding slowly, "Best night's sleep in ages."

"No regrets?"

"No regrets."

Dwight grinned, closing the gap between them in a gentle kiss. Ethan slowly ran his hand into Dwight's hair, humming happily into the kiss. He didn't want it to end. He'd wasted so much time fighting it, telling himself it was wrong, telling himself that even if he wanted it, it could never happen. He didn't want to waste anymore time. He just wanted to keep kissing Dwight, to keep tasting him, and to come up with some way to make up for all the pain he'd caused.

When he finally did pull away for air, he quickly rested his head in the crook of Dwight's neck, pulling him closer. He didn't want to move. He didn't want to go anywhere, because he knew he was going to have to tell Dwight that he had remembered a lot now, and he was worried about how much he was getting wrong. He was scared he had still missed out important parts of their past, and he was scared that the reminder of the accident would make things worse, would make things awkward between them. He didn't want them divided.

Dwight wrapped one arm around Ethan's waist, letting the other run up to his neck and hold him close, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine." Ethan whispered, rubbing his nose softly against Dwight's neck. He smiled fondly, brushing his fingers along Dwight's side, "I've never been better."

Dwight grinned, shivering as Ethan's fingers ran along his side and leant closer to him, seeking warmth, "Perfect."

"Can we stay here for a while?" Ethan looked up at Dwight with hopeful eyes, "I mean, you don't need to be anywhere, right? I just thought we could spend some time together for a little while."

Dwight gently kissed Ethan's nose, causing him to crinkle it, chuckling softly, "There is no place I'd rather be than right here, in your arms."

Ethan shifted closer, hugging Dwight as tightly as he could. He was content to stay right there in his arms, trying to figure out what he was going to do about telling Dwight. He'd definitely have to tell him that morning. The thing that had him stalling for time more than anything else was his fear or scaring Dwight, of worrying him, of making him think that maybe he wouldn't be able to handle the sudden burst of information.

He figured that Dwight would be okay. He'd have to be. Him remembering was a good thing. It was just what Dwight wanted. He just had to figure out how he was going to tell him. He couldn't really think straight though. Not with Dwight's skin pressed against his, not with his head rested against Dwight's warm shoulder. It was rather surprising really, that Dwight had skin as warm as it was. The pale colour was deceptive. Ethan had always thought Dwight's skin would be cold. That was just one of the many things Dwight surprised him with.

He hadn't even realised he had started running his finger along Dwight's arm. It felt so nice to brush his finger along Dwight's skin, feeling the curves of his muscles and the warmth radiating off him. It was nice to be able to just lay in Dwight's arms without having to say a word. They were passed the need for words. Ethan could remember that now too. It was still a little fuzzy. There were still things he was unsure of, but he supposed Dwight was going to be right there to help him figure those things out. Dwight would always be there for him.

So when Dwight started twirling a strand of Ethan's hair around his finger, Ethan didn't have the same reaction he would've had a few days earlier. If it had been earlier, he would've flinched, pulled away. He would've fought his urges, but he wasn't fighting anymore. He'd long since given up on fighting. Instead, he pressed gentle kisses along Dwight's shoulder, slowly making his way back up to his shoulder. The hunter hummed happily, his eyes closing as Ethan moved along his skin. It felt nice to be able to make Dwight so happy. To cause him so much pleasure with the simplest of touches.

Ethan grinned, wanting to keep going. He let his lips brush along Dwight's skin, leaving gentle kisses as he went. From his shoulder, Ethan slowly made his way up to his neck, nipping softly on his collarbone. Dwight bit his lip, groaning softly as he did, and Ethan couldn't help but tease him just a little bit, sucking gently on Dwight's skin for just a moment. He chuckled softly as Dwight whined under his breath. Slowly, he continued to press feathered light kisses up Dwight's neck, finally reaching his ear and whispering, "I love you."

Dwight grinned tilting his head to the side. He brushed his nose along Ethan's, looking into his eyes and whispering just as softly, "I love you too."

He let his fingers run along Ethan's arm gently, causing the Tweedle to shiver. As Dwight pressed some gentle kisses to his neck, Ethan decided that that was the beast place in the world to be. He didn't want anything more but that, right there. The perfect moment that drew on as Dwight flicked his tongue gently over his skin, kissing softly.

"What's gotten into you this morning?" Dwight murmured softly, and Ethan could tell he was smiling just from his voice.

Ethan looked up at Dwight, kissing him gently and spoke softly into his lips, "Just figuring some stuff out in my head about us."

Dwight frowned and Ethan immediately regretted saying that, because he knew. He knew Dwight was going to get worried, and he didn't want to worry him. He wanted Dwight to be happy about it, because he was. He just wished he hadn't put Dwight through so much pain before he finally snapped out of it and remembered everything.

Dwight ran his hand through Ethan's hair, "What about us?"

Ethan took a shaky breath, looking up into Dwight's eyes, "Dwight, I remember."


	17. Chapter 17

_Chapter 17_

Dwight just sort of stared at Ethan for a moment, trying to take in the information. He remembered? Remembered what? Everything? He couldn't have remembered everything, could he? Not all at once. Not that quickly. It was good though, really good. It meant he had his Ethan back, but Dwight was so scared Ethan would be hurting. To remember so much, so quickly, would be a lot to take in. Quickly, Dwight wrapped his arms around Ethan from behind, sitting up and pulling him close so that Ethan's back was flush against his chest. He rested his chin on Ethan's shoulder, smiling fondly at the closeness.

Ethan leant further back in Dwight's arms, covering his hands with his own. He let his fingers thread into Dwight's, feeling the weight of their hands together and running his thumb over Dwight's knuckles. The silence drew on, and though Ethan knew that it was good, that they could just be together without saying anything, he also knew how important it was for Dwight to say something. Right now. Anything to reassure him would be good.

Hesitantly, Ethan tilted his head to the side, looking up at Dwight, biting his lip nervously, "Please say something, Dwight."

Dwight tightened his hold on Ethan's hands reassuringly. He wasn't upset, at all. He was worried Ethan might think he was, but how could he be? He was ecstatic. He had his Ethan back. He was just scared of how much the Tweedle had had to go through to get those memories back in such a short amount of time. He pressed a gentle kiss to Ethan's cheek, trying to reassure him and earning a happy sigh. He grinned, nuzzling Ethan's neck and hugging him a little tighter.

He didn't want to break the silence but he knew he had to, whispering softly, "How are you feeling?"

Ethan chuckled softly, "I'm fine Dwight."

"No. Be honest." Dwight kissed Ethan's shoulder, sighing softly, "Getting six months worth of memories back in one night is a lot to deal with. Don't act like it isn't Ethan, I'm here for you."

Ethan shifted in Dwight's hold just enough to look in his eyes, biting his lip and smiling softly. He took a hand from Dwight's, brushing it through the hair at the back of his neck and whispering softly, "I'm okay. I have you, and I love you, and I'm okay. I promise. You'll keep me safe. I know you will."

Dwight looked into Ethan's icy blue eyes, chewing nervously on his lip. Ethan's hand running through his hair felt so nice, so familiar, and the warmth in his eyes seemed more familiar too. He was still worried. He was beyond worried. He knew it had taken more out of Ethan that he wanted to admit, and he knew he had to get Ethan to admit it, to talk to him, because it would just be too hard for him to deal with alone. Looking into those soft blue eyes though, Dwight smiled softly as he recognised that look, the one Ethan always gave him; love. He felt like he was finally home.

He brushed his thumb over Ethan's cheek, smiling fondly as Ethan's eyes fluttered closed for a moment, leaning into the touch. Dwight felt like everything might actually be okay now. He had his Ethan back. They could get through the rest, because they had each other.

"T-There were so many things I wanted to tell you. There were so many things I wanted to do. E-Every day, I saw you and everyone got to hug you, but I knew I couldn't." Dwight's voice came out as a whisper.

"You could've. I wouldn't have minded. We were still friends in here." Ethan whispered just as softly, pointing to his temple, "You were always my friend. You were always allowed to hug me, just like everyone else."

"I wasn't though." Dwight tightened his hold around Ethan, resting their heads together, "Because if I did, I just…I know for sure I wouldn't have been able to let go. I knew that if I hugged you, I'd want more. I'd kiss you, and I couldn't force that on you. I wouldn't do that to you. I love you too much for that."

Ethan closed his eyes, taking a shaky breath before he looked up at Dwight, wrapping his arms around his neck to hold him in place. He hated knowing that he hurt Dwight that much. He wished he could fix it, make the pain go away, but he didn't know how. Their noses brushed gently together and Ethan opened his eyes once more, looking into Dwight's deep, dark brown ones and smiled softly. Those eyes. Those beautiful, perfect eyes. They were one of the things he fell in love with.

Finally, Ethan whispered softly, their lips barely touching, "You don't have to hide your feelings anymore."

Dwight was so desperate for Ethan's affection, the words caught him off guard, his breath hitching as they spilled from Ethan's lips. That was enough for him. That was permission, and that was all he needed. He looked at the soft smile on Ethan's face for a moment more before his eyes fell shut, closing the distance between them in a gentle kiss.

This kiss was so much more important than the others. It was like the first time all over again. Dwight needed to show Ethan how much he meant to him, how much he cared about him, and Ethan needed to reassure Dwight that he was there, that he would always be there. Dwight let a hand slowly run from Ethan's cheek, to his neck and slowly into his hair. He'd missed the feel of Ethan's hair beneath his fingers. So soft. He wanted to make the kiss last, bringing Ethan closer. There were so many emotions he had to pour into that kiss, so many things he needed to say. He needed to tell Ethan he loved him, he needed him, and that he was so, so scared to be without him.

Ethan answered in kind, pressing their lips firmly together. He poured everything into that kiss, trying to tell Dwight that he was there, that he always would be. It was soft, and sweet and Ethan was just taking his time to appreciate how perfect Dwight's lips were as he slowly parted his own, flicking his tongue against Dwight's.

The hunter quickly took the hint, parting his own and groaning softly as Ethan's tongue swept into his mouth, tasting lazily. Dwight brushed his tongue along Ethan's, pulling him closer. He drew Ethan closer, leaving no space between them and started gently sucking on Ethan's tongue, causing the Tweedle to moan softly pressing himself closer. Reluctantly, Ethan pulled away for air, whining as Dwight ran his teeth along his tongue as he did.

Ethan smirked, licking his lips and tasting Dwight on them. He whispered softly, "You are such a tease." and kissed Dwight's nose.

Dwight chuckled softly, crinkling his nose as Ethan kissed it. He pressed gentle kisses to Ethan's lips to accentuate each word as he spoke, "I learnt… from… the very… best… tease… ever."

Ethan snickered, "Really? Who's that, then? Should I be jealous?"

"Oh, well, I don't know if you know him." Dwight nipped gently on Ethan's neck, "He has this beautiful golden blonde hair that falls into his eyes. I love running my hand through that hair." Kissing his way up Ethan's neck, he whispered, "And he has these soft, ice blue eyes, I just stare into. His lips. They're so soft, and his body…" Dwight bit his lip, looking him up and down, "Mmm his body is to die for."

Ethan grinned, tugging on Dwight's lip with his teeth, "That's all well and good Dwight, but you just described my brother."

"Just because you're twins, doesn't mean I was talking about him!" Dwight shuddered, causing Ethan to laugh, kissing him reassuringly.

Dwight laughed softly, looking into Ethan's eyes for a moment. He was glad. He was so, so happy to have Ethan back, but that didn't mean he wasn't worried. He didn't want Ethan to keep it all inside, so he had to ask. He had to figure out where exactly Ethan's mind was and how he could help him.

Delicately running his fingers through Ethan's hair, he kept the soft smile on his face, "What was it like? To remember everything?"

Ethan frowned. He leant his head against Dwight's shoulder, trying to figure out what to say. He wasn't sure really. It just happened. One minute, he didn't know, and the next he did.

Taking a shaky breath, he murmured softly, still trying to figure out his words as he went, "I…it was like, I went to sleep last night and I dreamt it. All of it. Well, I don't know if I remember all of it. You're going to have to help me fill in some of the blanks. It was like I saw us, and I was doing that before, you know? I would see us, and know that it had to be real but the feelings weren't there. This time they were and now I look back on the way I treated you while I couldn't remember."

Ethan cupped Dwight's face in his hand, biting his lip, "I'm so sorry."

Dwight quickly shook his head, resting it against Ethan's once more and smiled softly, "It's okay. Really. You didn't know. I was just trying to keep my distance so that you wouldn't be freaked out by my intense need to look after you." He chuckled softly.

"I felt safe with you. I wanted to be close to you. I didn't know why, I just knew it was important for some reason." Ethan pressed a gentle kiss to Dwight's cheek, smiling reassuringly, his voice going soft, "You were so important to me, even when I had no idea why. Even when the thought of what you wanted from me was something I just couldn't give, I kind of wanted to, and I just wanted to keep you happy. That's how much you mean to me."

Dwight grinned, nudging Ethan's cheek with his nose. They were going to be okay. He knew they were. This was exactly what he wanted and what he was completely terrified wouldn't happen. He only had one more thing he had to fix. He didn't know how to fix it though, but he thought he ought to try. pressing a gentle kiss to Ethan's lips, reluctant to pull away, he whispered softly, "I'm so sorry I wasn't the one driving."

"I'm not." Ethan murmured just as softly, looking up into Dwight's eyes, "That must have been terrifying for you. I can't even begin to imagine it, so don't you dare so you wish you were the one driving, because you already went through enough. I don't know if I could've handled seeing you like that. You're much stronger than me."

"They made me leave. I didn't want to, but they said I had to leave the room." Dwight bit down hard on his lip at the memory.

"I know. I know, I remember you saying that. It's not your fault. None of this is your fault. I should've been watching the road."

"I distracted you." Dwight murmured sadly, causing Ethan to roll his eyes.

Ethan looked Dwight in the eyes and whispered softly, "How about we stop blaming ourselves, and just be happy we're both okay?"

Dwight chuckled, nodding slowly, "W-We're going to be okay, right?"

Ethan hugged Dwight as tightly as he could, speaking softly before brushing their lips together once more, "We're going to be amazing, Dwight."


	18. Chapter 18

_Epilogue_

Dwight had to be quiet. He knew he had absolutely no chance, but he wanted to try, he had to. Seemed like every time this happened, he tried, no matter how much he knew that he was completely and utterly screwed. Still, it was fun to put up a fight. Fun in a kind of terrifying way.

He'd ran so fast. He didn't even realise he could run that fast until he did. He supposed that being with Ethan did that, made him a faster runner. That was the thing about Ethan; it was all about running, usually away from the trouble he'd caused.

At that current moment, Dwight had his back pressed firmly to the wall, hiding from his foe. He knew that the only way he could stand some kind of chance was to use his stealth as an advantage, hiding himself as he moved from room to room, trying to find the one that was after him.

It was quiet. Eerily quiet. Usually there was always some kind of commotion in the halls of Windsor, but at that moment, nothing. Dwight supposed the rest of the student body knew what was going on, and didn't want to be around, afraid to get in the way of crossfire. Dwight understood. He'd been in there shoes once.

It used to terrify him, really, but now he was used to it. He knew what he was doing, even if he knew he'd get beaten down every time. It was like his enemy was a trained assassin or something, knowing exactly when to strike, where to hit to knock him down.

Not that he minded. Not really. It was fun. He loved it. He knew he'd always lose, but he always tossed that thought to the back of his mind, content with just playing the game.

Dwight froze in his spot when he heard foot steps. So that's where he was. Dwight waited a moment more before he jumped out from behind the door, firing a bullet. A yelp came from his prey, causing the hunter to blink a few times in shock. Then he realised that it wasn't the enemy at all. It was Reed.

"Oh, dude, I'm so sorry. I didn't think anyone else was around." Dwight moved to Reed's side where he'd frozen in place, dusting off his shoulders and looking him over to make sure he hadn't been hurt, "You okay?"

"I'm fine!" Reed squeaked, holding up his hands in surrender, "I didn't get the memo. How long have you been doing this?"

Dwight tilted his head to the side, trying to think. How long had they been doing this? It felt like it had started as soon as he got out of his lesson. He walked into Windsor hall and it was already completely silent. There was no one there, completely bare. That was when Dwight had seen it, sitting precariously on the common room table. A nerf gun, with a small note attached. The note said simply, 'Dwight, the games already begun. Good luck. - Ethan xx'

So there he was, hiding from the Tweedle. He looked back at Reed, shrugging, "As soon as I got back from class."

Reed's eyes widened. That meant it had been hours. Dwight wasn't complaining though. It was fun, really. It had been a long, long time since he and Ethan had had a nerf fight. He loved the carefree side to Ethan when he had a nerf gun in his hands. There was that time when it absolutely terrified him, but now he loved it. It made Ethan so happy, how could he not?

He looked at Reed again, seeing he was still a little shocked and bit his lip nervously, "I didn't hurt you right?" He was really hoping Reed would be the very last person to ever get caught in the crossfire. Who knew how quickly Reed could fall on his face, especially under the circumstances.

"I'm fine!" Reed chuckled softly, running a hand through his strawberry blonde hair, making sure he hadn't bump his head. He just couldn't be sure and it was better safe than sorry. Smiling softly up at Dwight, he rested his hands on his hips, "Next time aim higher. Ethan's much taller than I am."

Dwight laughed, "Will do."

Dwight looked Reed up and down with a raised eyebrow. His uniform was more immaculate than usual. Reed, the greatest artist Dwight had ever known, usually had a stain of some kind on the sleeves of his blazer. It could be from paint, charcoal, clay, anything. He never let his other clothes get dirty, but Reed was okay with messing up the blazers to some degree, saying that they really needed something more fashionable anyway, and more practical for summer. This time though, the stains weren't there, and his sleeves were rolled up out of the way of his hands.

Dwight smirked, "You going somewhere special, Reed?"

Reed blushed, looking around as if searching for an answer, "I…w-what? No! What gave you that idea?" He chuckled nervously.

Dwight grinned, leaning closer and murmuring softly, so that if anyone did happen to walk by, they wouldn't hear him, "Where's Shane taking you out, then?"

Reed shuffled awkwardly on his feet, look down at the floor, "H-He…that Italian place that everyone's been talking about."

Dwight whistled, impressed, "Classy. Pricey. He must really love you."

Reed hit Dwight's arm, pointing at him threateningly, "You don't tell anyone."

"Who am I going to tell?" Dwight rubbed his arm, frowning, "But wait, shouldn't you be dressing up? Why are you looking extra presentable in your uniform?"

"B-Because…" Reed shook his head, looking down at his feet.

"Reed. Speak, or I fire at you again."

"Okay!" Reed quickly threw up his hands once more, "Shane said he had something he wanted me to wear, so he's bringing it to my room for me to change into."

Dwight chuckled, nudging Reed's shoulder, "That's really sweet. Have fun, okay? Don't tell Shane I shot you. I'll never hear the end of it."

Reed laughed, "Of course not."

Dwight was just about to say something else when he heard a second set of foot steps. He froze. There was no chance someone else was walking around too. Dwight didn't want to turn around. He knew it was coming from behind him, but he kind of wanted to remain oblivious. This was an absolutely terrible way to get caught. Usually it was much better. Usually he was hiding and had made a preemptive strike. At least then, he went down with some form of dignity.

Eventually he had to turn around though. He couldn't not. It was time for him to face up to his demise. Slowly he turned on his feet. There he stood, Ethan Brightman in all his glory. He was a fair way down the hall, nerf gun in hand, and the smirk was impossible to miss. To say Dwight was scared was an understatement. He didn't want to take his eyes away from the boy down the hall, but he had to get Reed out. Turning to face Reed, he saw that the boy had frozen in place once more.

"Reed. Run." Reed just stared for a moment, Dwight's words not really sinking in until the hunters hand pressed down on his shoulder, "Get out of here, Reed!"

Reed shook his head, looking up at him and quickly nodding, running and Dwight bit his lip, calling out, "Don't run too fast!"

Ethan tilted his head to the side, slowly walking down the hall towards him. Dwight quickly held up his gun, aiming at Ethan. He wasn't going to last long, but that didn't mean he couldn't put up a fight. Ethan seemed to like it when he put up a fight, anyway.

"Hold up." He warned, trying his best to keep the nerves out of his voice. He didn't want to admit that even after all the time they'd had together, Ethan Brightman with a nerf gun in his hands was still one of the scariest things he could think off. He had aimed to sound almost threatening. Maybe it would've been enough to actually make Ethan stop. No such luck. Ethan simply raised his eyebrows, a small chuckled escaping his lips.

Dwight just watched Ethan as he got closer and closer, taking a shaky breath. He was doomed. So, so doomed. There was no way he was going to last long. Not with Ethan. Not when Ethan had that glint in his eyes and his finger firmly on the trigger. He didn't know what Ethan was about to do next, but he was intrigued, really. Ethan was always so much fun when he got like this. There was a time when Dwight thought that, no. This would never ever be fun, it would only ever be insane. He didn't know how Ethan had changed him so much in such a short amount of time. Made him so, so much better.

"The whole tough guy thing? That's hot." Ethan teased. grinning. He spun the gun on his finger for a moment before holding it up and aiming it at Dwight, "You know I'm going to have to kill you now, right?"

"But baby, I thought what we had was special." Dwight pouted, holding his hands up in surrender. It was pointless to try to fight Ethan. He'd only beat him anyway. That didn't mean he couldn't have a little fun trying to stop him from shooting. The giggle that spilled from Ethan's lips caused Dwight to grin with him, "You don't have to do this."

"Oh Dwight, I think I do." Ethan sighed a little sadly, his finger on the trigger faltering just a little as he watched Dwight, "Would you please not pout like that when I'm trying to kill you?"

Dwight chuckled softly, deciding that he was definitely going to pout more, looking at Ethan with sad eyes. It was always fun to tease Ethan like that. Ethan would say he hated it. He would every time, but they both knew he didn't. He loved it. It was fun and Ethan just loved the fact that he could get Dwight to do something goofy like that.

"Okay, fine. That's it." Ethan rolled his eyes at Dwight's stupidity, squeezing the trigger and firing three bullets straight at Dwight. The first hit his chest, the second his arm, and the last hitting his shoulder. Dwight just stood there, shocked for a moment.

This was that moment. That moment that happened every single time Ethan and he had a nerf fight. Every time without fail. It was without a doubt, Dwight's favourite part of having nerf fights with Ethan, even if it was a little painful at first.

Ethan knew Dwight was waiting for it. The smirk that grew on Ethan's face told Dwight as much. He watched as Ethan started moving towards him again, and there was absolutely no way Dwight could stifle his grin anymore. He had been looking forward to this more than anything else, because Ethan was just so affectionate when he got like this. It was like he was grateful for Dwight, thankful that he went to the trouble of putting up with his insanity, and how could Dwight not? The smile on Ethan's face was more than enough of a reward for him to go through the fear of Ethan shooting him in the eye, because Dwight truly believed Ethan could be that good a shot.

Ethan's pace got faster and faster until he was running at Dwight and all Dwight could do was hold out his arms, preparing himself. It didn't take long from there. One minute, Ethan was some distance away, the next, Dwight was hit with a heavy weight, grunting as Ethan pushed him to the ground with a loud thud. Dwight's eyes closed, groaning in pain as his back his the hard floor, chuckling softly as he tried to get used to the pain.

Ethan snickered, shifting up to straddle Dwight's hips. He leant down to Dwight, their noses just touching and brushed a hand through his hair, "Aw, I'm sorry baby, did I hurt you?" He teased, a grin clear on his face.

"You know you did. You always do." Dwight laughed, "Oh God, I think you broke one of my ribs or something."

Ethan leant forward, nipping gently on Dwight's lip, "You exaggerate too much."

Dwight ran his hands along Ethan's back, "Yeah, well you talk too much."

Ethan smirked, "Is that your way of hinting that you'd like me to put my mouth to better use?"

"Yes. Yes it is."

Ethan leant forward, their lips brushing together as he whispered, "What are the magic words, Dwight?"

Dwight frowned, thinking for a moment before smiling softly, looking up into Ethan's eyes, pouting slightly, "Please, Ethan?"

Ethan smirked, pulling away and tilting his head to the side, "Tsk, no Dwight. Those are not the magic words."

Dwight whined sadly, his fingers digging into Ethan's back, urging him back down to his level, "What are the magic words then? Whatever they are, I'll say them…"

Ethan smirked, leaning closer once more, "Mmm such a good boy. You've got to admit that I won, silly."

Dwight groaned softly, his fingers digging into Ethan's back as he grabbed Ethan's lip between his teeth, tugging him close, "You won. You know you won. You always win. I don't know why you insist on hearing those words."

Ethan hummed happily, "I just love hearing it."

Dwight snickered, pressing their lips together. He quickly wrapped an arm around Ethan's neck, keeping him in place and groaning softly as Ethan's fingers trailed along his sides. He nipped gently on Ethan's lip, sighing happily as Ethan let his hands run along Dwight's chest, slowly moving his hand up to cup his cheek.

Ethan growled softly into Dwight's lips, biting roughly on his lip, earning a groan from the hunter beneath him. Dwight knew in those moments that everything would be okay. They'd been through so, so much in such a short amount of time. Dwight was so sure he was going to lose him, but he didn't. They came out of it stronger than ever, and Dwight knew he'd do anything to keep something like that from ever happening to Ethan again. They'd be okay, as long as they had each other.

Dwight let his tongue slide along Ethan's lips, grinding his hips up into Ethan's just enough to tease, causing the Tweedle to gasp, pulling away from the kiss.

"It's not nice to tease." He murmured softly, nipping Dwight's neck sharply.

Dwight whined, "God, I love you so much."

Ethan grinned, "I love you too." Sucking on Dwight's pulse point, Ethan had the boy beneath him whining, struggling and moaning his pleas, "Now let's go somewhere more private."


End file.
